Things Go On

My life is pretty much just a loop from day to day right now. There aren't that many things which happen differently from what happened the day before. My well-worn rut is getting deeper every day.

I wake up, sometimes early, sometimes late. If I'm lucky, Dad's around, and I get some nookie if I've got time. I work. I eat. I think about sex while working some more. It distracts me, and sometimes I have to take a bathroom break and tickle myself until the needs are more under control. I eat again. If I've got time, I look for porn, and if I'm very lucky, Dad and I have a second shot before bed.

I haven't been good about blogging because it takes time, and usually if I blog I like to have something interesting to say, and when I have interesting things to say, they often make me anxious, and I don't generally have the time to write and then take care of needs. Or I don't have the ability to take care of needs; I can't think about anal.

Sveta has been busy too, so I've only seen her once. I'm hoping Valentine's we can do something, which is pretty sad really, because she's not supposed to be spending Valentine's with a sad old woman. Yes, I'm feeling sorry for myself. But really, she's supposed to be spending Valentine's with someone other than me. Or maybe I just think that. I'm a shitty Valentine in some respects; sure, you'll get lucky, but you'd get lucky even if it weren't Valentine's Day (yes, there is supposed to be an apostrophe). I have done fun Valentine things in the past, but right now, I'm not up to it. We'll probably just eat chocolate and fuck, not necessarily in that order or stopping one to do the other.

I'm going to stop this post because it's getting entirely too depressing. I'm not really depressed, I'm just run-down. I'm hoping that soon, after I lose my current job (not because of the economy, just because gigs don't last forever) I can kick-start my life a little, find a better job, make some better money, get out of the rut. It's not a great time to be looking for work, but I can't help it. I might even have to call out the big guns and wear something slutty to interviews. I don't like trading on sex-appeal, but desperate times call for desperate measures.