TMI Filler

I didn't do the last one (in order on TMI) because I have a backlog (as can be seen by the fact that this one is coming much later than it was originally posted) and it was stupid. This one is marginally less stupid. Once again, from TMI.

1. What are your feelings about traditional bachelor/bachelorette parties?

Clear proof that monogamy is a sham. Okay, that's not fair. Monogamy isn't a sham, and I respect people who are monogamous because hey, more for me that way. Only kidding. But bachelor/ette parties seem to either be just parties, and why the hell not, or excuses to cheat. Just because you're not married yet doesn't make it not cheating. I've been to parties before weddings where the couple were both there and there was some goofy fun, and that's fine, but if you're segregating the sexes and doing things secretly, you're cheating, Jack/Jill.

But I'm going to have a killer bachelorette party if I ever get married. Strippers will not be involved, and my prospective spouse will be. In other words, group sex with the bride and groom. Oh yeah, it'll be epic.

2. Do you wear (or not wear) something special to bed/dress differently when you want to have sex?

To bed? Or just in general? Because in general, if I'm expecting sex and I want it to be something other than random sex, I will wear nicer underwear and I might dress more sexily. But to bed? I sleep naked. It's not an invitation, it's a sign which says, "Hey, if you want me, here I am." I do it alone, together, whatever. If I sleep in clothes, I always wind up strangling myself on a neckline or being pinched by something. Fuck clothes. Nudity in bed rocks.

3. Do you ever fake orgasms?

I don't fake. I occasionally embellish the truth. Sometimes the O isn't that big, and it's through no fault of my partner/partners, and I make it bigger because it's a two-way street. I don't believe in rewarding bad behavior, but I will reward good behavior by being a little over-dramatic. Also, sometimes sex needs a little drama to spice things up. As long as I'm cumming and my partner isn't doing anything wrong, I'll express my appreciation. If that means I emphasize my enjoyment a bit, hey, that's not lying. And sometimes, if I get into embellishing the truth, the truth starts to feel better. But no, I don't fake orgasms... except once or twice when I really just wanted to get the fuck out of Dodge and have him cum already.

4. Do you own any leather or rubber clothing?

I have leather boots. Does that count? I'm not a huge fan of tight things, and things that capture body heat make me sweat and then I pass out from dehydration. Seriously, I can sweat out in a heartbeat. I wore leather once, and was profoundly uncomfortable, and it wasn't even that sexy and certainly wasn't the bottom layer. The idea is sexier than the reality, like edible panties, which are a goddamn joke. When I first heard about them as a child, I figured they were some kind of cloth made with spun sugar. They are most assuredly not. And even that sounds like a horrible idea to my more experienced mind.

5. On a scale from 1-10, how willing are you to do something in bed you don't want to just because you are asked?

Depends who's asking. I have limits. Beyond them, I will not go. There are things I don't enjoy a whole lot that I'll do if asked nicely. But I won't do scat, for instance, just because someone asks. Even Sheri couldn't peer-pressure me into doing that, which fortunately she's never tried to pressure me into doing. But I have gone to places where things got unpleasant for me because I let someone talk me into something. So maybe a 5? I hate judging analog values on a digital scale. There's no discrete nature for this system. It's infinitely dense. Math geek test.

Bonus: Can men and women be "just friends?"

What the Hell kind of question is that? If you don't think they can, you're a sexist jerk. Sorry. I mean, that's like asking if I can be just friends with a woman. I mean, I am attracted to women, have sex with them, so obviously I must be unable to separate sex from friendship, and thus I can never be friends with anyone. What a load of crap.

Now, I happen to believe that one can be friends with someone and still have sex with them. I have friends who are nothing more than friends, and I've had sex with them and would do so again. Gwen, for example, is one of my best friends, and we have no plans on becoming romantic, but we've fucked like rabbits. Still, friends without benefits is perfectly feasible, and I have many friends of a non-sexual variety of both sexes. It depends on what's appropriate for the friendship. I don't talk to all my friends about my personal problems either. Can I be friends without revealing every facet of my being to a person? Absolutely. There are levels of friendship and types of friendship, and it's all a rich mishmash of crap.

For the love of whatever deity or deities or lack thereof you hold dear, send me some questions or something. TMI is great and all, but really, it's a mixed bag.