TMI Grab-Bag

I don't know, maybe TMI has stopped. Since there wasn't a new one, I've gone back through some of the older ones I've never answered, trolling for interesting questions. In no particular order:

What is the farthest distance from home you have you have ever had sex or an orgasm? What is there farthest distance you have travelled from your home to have a sexual encounter?

I've probably never been more than 1000 miles from my home. Maybe slightly more. I'm not a big traveller, not because I don't like trips, but because I don't like travel. It's a distinction. Anyway, I don't think I've ever been to a place farther away than that, and I've had sex and orgasms in the farthest place I can think of, which is visiting my uncle Sam (incidentally, the distance is why we never see him, grrr).

How many states (or Canadian provences or your country's geopolitical division) and counties have you had sex and/or an orgasms in?

Maybe 6? Possibly more than that; I don't keep count, and sometimes having sex in the car means one is doing it in places one isn't thinking about. Less than 10, certainly.

Would you rather watch a erotic/porn movie, read a story, or listen to an audio? Why?

Depends on what I'm looking for. Audio seldom gets me off, but it can get me in the mood sometimes. Movies are quick and dirty and usually get me off, but a good story will turn me on and get me off better. I'd have to say that I prefer stories, but I watch a lot of porn videos too.

Have you ever had:

1. Angry sex? Yes indeed.
2. Pity sex? No. I don't fuck people out of pity. I might fuck someone because no one else will, but that's not pity, that's charity. There is a difference. I don't feel superior about charity.
3. "Oh well, I might as well" sex? God yes.
4. One-of-you-knew-it-was-goodbye-and-the-other-didn't sex? No, I don't think so. Usually if it's goodbye, either I tell the person or I'm not having sex with them. Maybe it happened to me once, but I don't recall.
5. Don't-remember-having-it sex? Yep. Not proud of it. There's little point in having sex if you're not going to remember it.
6. Regret-it-afterward sex? Of course. I've done too many things I regret, and sex is certainly one of them.
7. Can't-remember-his/her-name sex? I have a bad memory for names, but I usually don't fuck people without introduction. But I've done this.
8. Never-knew-his/her-name sex? That's a bit awkward, because I like to know what to call out. Awkward or not, I've done it too.

What was the worst single sexual experience of your life?

Emotionally? I'd rather not talk about it, honestly. There are some things I don't talk about. Strictly in terms of it being a bad lay? That's a hard one to say. I've certainly had some bad sex. Given my attitude toward trying things out and not being hung up on particulars, I sometimes wind up in situations where the sex is just awful. I try not to let that affect me; I just make a mental note to keep away from that person or activity in future. It's like sampling new food. I've eaten some terrible food in my time, but I'm a pretty adventurous eater. There are a few things I won't eat, or even try, but other than that, I'll try it, and if I don't like it, I don't eat it again. Same with sex. I could give a roll-call of bad sex, but why dwell on it. I'd rather give a roll-call of great sex. In fact, that's sort of what I do around here, isn't it?

Bunch of Stuff

Playing catch-up a bit here, just because I've finally got some free time before I head into the next gig. I wish that being busy meant being permanently employed or being well-remunerated, but neither of those things is true. Someday. Someday.

First off, the excitingest news (sic, sic, I know, I know, but I don't care): Sveta's spring vacation is next week (she actually gets to have it sort of in spring, unlike a lot of colleges, for reasons I don't really understand) and instead of heading to PC Beach, she's going to spend the week with me. In fact, if she can swing it, she may be able to show up late this week, and then we'll have two weekends and a bunch of weekdays, and even if I have to be working some, it'll still be great. Hooray. So I'm looking forward to that, obviously.

Second, Simon and I. As I said, I wasn't looking for long-term at all. Which is good, because he pretty much threw me over for Andie. They're actors, they stick together. I doubt very highly their relationship will last longer than a week now the show is over. Yes, I'm just a bit bitter, not because I wanted him, but because I'm so much hotter than she is. Sorry, ego talking.

However, I've revised my estimation of Simon back to something of a player-asshole, because he seemed to have no problem going behind her back and giving me the old torpedo. I might feel guilty in other circumstances, because I'm not a home-wrecker nor do I feel, as some do, that it's not my fault if people are unfaithful with me. In this case, however, I don't feel guilty at all. I wish I could have convinced them to have another threesome with me, maybe worked on Andie a little until she came over to my side. Ah well. I just know that every night, during intermission, while Andie was changing into her next costume, I got some from Simon. The light booth is in the balcony, and usually the balcony doesn't sell, so there's less risk of being discovered in there, but still, we had to be quick and fairly quiet and keep away from the window.

He would slip up as the house lights were going up, sneak in the door, and I would be on my knees in a flash, pull out his cock from his pants, and get him hard as quickly as possible. One night, he was on a hair trigger for whatever reason (possibly having been onstage making out with Andie) and he came in my mouth almost instantly. But most of the time, he just got hard, I pulled the condom on him, and he pressed me up against the wall, pulled my panties to one side (or sometimes had free access because I wasn't wearing them) and pressed in. I confess, I was usually tickling the tender tamale a bit during the show, so I was on a bit of a hair trigger myself. I'd get five minutes of solid, rapid fucking, probably get off nicely enough, and then he'd pull out, pull the condom off, and shoot his load in my mouth, give me a peck on the cheek, and hustle down to get ready for Act II.

I like working lights because I'm by myself, can do certain things in the booth, maybe have a drink while I'm working if the play isn't really heavy with cues. So this is just icing on the cake. There are a lot of things I don't like about lights, but there are definite advantages.

But now that's over with, and hopefully it won't be passed around that I'm the lighting whore. Now that I dislike the idea, just that I don't like the implications. I'd be happy to have hot and cold running sex in the booth while I work, believe me. Maybe I should arrange that... But how? I could bring Sveta on as an intern, she could "learn lights" during shows (well, particularly during the rehearsals, because those get boring fast) and really just be there to pleasure me. No, only kidding. It's a nice fantasy though. Maybe we'll stop by the theatre one night when no one's there and enact it...

Amateur Hour

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TMI But Not From TMI

Thanks to Seph and others, I have a new TMI.

1. If you were Roman, what would your name be?

Probably the same as it is now. It's originally a Greek name, I know, but we actually get it via the Romans. Or perhaps Hornia Maxima. No, I'd be Tertia, because I'm the third child, and I'd be a Celtic slave, undoubtedly, since I'm about as Roman as Vercingetorix.

2. If you were a crayon, what colour would you be?

Red. All the cool stuff is either done with red or black crayon. But I hate crayons. I like colored pencils. More control.

3. Your house is on fire and you can only take three things. What would they be?

If my house catches fire, I'm running back into the flames and expiring like the phoenix because there's no fucking way I'm dealing with my house burning down. It better not burn down, you hear me. I really can't pick three things. I have a lot of books and while I could live without any of them, picking three of them to save would be almost impossible. Plus my other stuff, which again, I could live without, but I can't prioritize. I'd probably have to save my computer, because it has stuff on it that I don't want to lose. Other than that, I don't know. I'll be burnt up anyway.

4. What was your scariest experience?

I got practically raped once. Not pleasant, but I don't know if it was my scariest experience because it wasn't rape exactly, nor was I terrified, just not happy with the situation. I don't get stage fright when I act, but I get horrible stage fright when I'm giving presentations to people. It's probably one of those. Or maybe auditions. I hate auditions; I can get naked in front of a crowd of thousands of strangers (and I bet someone just came) but I have the worst time doing a monologue in front of three people I know. But I don't know if those were scary in the way an ax-wielding maniac would be, for instance.

Oh, okay, I've got it. I once had to lie on a ledge which was just wide enough for my left shoulder and left ass cheek, holding on with one hand, while with the other I reached out for a bolt which was just out of my reach. Above stage. Which was 20 feet straight down, with nothing between me and it but air. And then I let go of my hand-hold and stretched and was able to loosen the bolt as I was essentially falling, then quickly shifted my weight back and grabbed the hand-hold again. I don't have a problem with heights most of the time, but that was terrifying. And talk about unsafe. I came down after that, stayed firmly on the ground for the remainder of the day, then went home and drank heavily. Really heavily. I still had vertigo for a few days after that. That was scary in a visceral, death-defying way. Maybe some of you are scratching your heads and wondering why the fuck I would do that. Maybe others are saying, "Yeah, that's not scary at all, do it all the time." I do things like that all the time too. It's part of my job. I think nothing of standing on the tops of ladders (although don't let OSHA find out). But that was scary to me.

5. Something you’re proud of doing?

Hey, what the hell, I'll say that I'm fairly proud of this blog. I'm proud of telling Sveta about my life. I'm proud of some of the work I do. I'm proud that I've never gotten an STD aside from a yeast infection which might have been the result of sex and not normal things. If you can hear a knocking noise, no one is trying to get in, it's just me knocking on wood so hard my fist is getting bruised.

And here we have the additions.

6. (impy) What’s the dumbest thing you have done lately?

Oh, having certain sexual encounters might qualify. But I do a lot of stupid things.

7. (nilla) Strangest food combination?

I like Montreal Steak seasoning (the spicy is better) on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Or just cracked pepper. Yes. Seriously.

8. (seph) If you could create a world in your own image…what would you call it?

Seph's answer was Pornia, and I can't top that for greatness, but I don't think it'd be fair or correct for me to simply call my world Pornia too. That's one of the advantages of the original TMI; no answers to have to compete with.

I'll say "The Love Planet, Baby." All of that. The "Baby" is important. Galactic voyagers of the future will say, "Hey, Zorg 3279, where are you headed for shore leave?"

"I'm beaming down to The Love Planet, Baby!"

"Don't catch space-syphilis."

"Naw, man, The Love Planet, Baby is entirely space-syphilis-free."

"Well damn, I'm heading down to The Love Planet, Baby too, then!"

Yeah, it'll be awesome.

9. (Lexi, that's me) If your life were a movie, who would direct it?

I know, I know. I could have made this easier. Also, I figure I'm going to get a lot of "some porn director" responses. But my life wouldn't be directed by a porn director. I want classy sex, not porn sex. God, I really could have made it easier. It's simple to come up with the question, but to answer it...

I think my life would probably be a collaboration between Barry Sonnenfeld and Francois Truffaut, equal parts comedy and sexy, classy as hell, one choice piece of film making (actually, I would love to see what would come out of a collaboration between those two, because it would be stranger than Montreal Steak seasoning on PB&J). Of course, that's only if I can't direct it myself. I want to be played by Famke Janssen, I think. No, I want to be an auteur and direct and star as myself. But with more explosions, wittier dialogue, and plenty of nudity.

3 Years

Holy shit. I forgot last night, so I'm back-dating this post, but 3 years. Jesus. I never thought I'd make it this long.

Thanks for all the comments over the past three years, the nice words, the questions, even the stuff which didn't really make sense. No, I'm not stopping now. Just taking a moment to commemorate.

I'd have to say that the biggest thing of the past three years was definitely Sveta finding out (there are four parts, here's the last). It's recent, sure, but it was huge. I never thought it would happen, not really. And that we're still in love, still together... okay, enough sap. I hope everyone has enjoyed how that story unfolded, because I know we have.

Now, the traditional gift for a third anniversary is leather. That would suit a lot of bloggers, but me, I'm not much for leather. But I'll see what I can do. Don't expect bondage gear; I don't own any, and leather chafes and doesn't breathe. I liked cotton better.

Think of this as an excuse to ask questions, make requests, even suggest ways to improve the blog. I won't necessarily agree, but it can't hurt to point things out. Maybe I'll do a redesign. Maybe I won't. I really will try to do something for the anniversary though. It's been hard, I know, with 400 not really having much fanfare, but I do try, with my limitations, and if nothing else, I'll keep blogging and trying to make things sexy around here.

So, once again: Happy birthday to Lex-ploits! Here's to three more years!

Sex and the Stage

I thought I'd take a moment out of my busy schedule of decompressing to clarify comments that I made regarding simulated sex and its actual appeal. I was tired/drunk. Maybe I can be a bit more clear now. No, I am not doing this because someone complained. You're all great. I'm doing this because I'm in a tireless hunt for perfection, and I complained. Also because it helps to gradually zero in on a position.

Sometimes, sex on stage is really sex on stage. Very, very seldom. Incredibly seldom. If I hadn't been there, I wouldn't have believed it. But most of the time, sex on stage (or even foreplay on stage) isn't sexy at all. It can't be. You have to pay attention to lines and cues and blocking and so on, and there's never any actual coitus going on anyway. I've done various things on stage which, if they were real, would have been sexy as hell to me, but because they were just acting, they were mechanical. I think even most Method actors who believe in living their parts would agree that sex on stage isn't sex. It's like sex in porn. It's for the audience. If you're performing, you do things differently.

But sometimes things happen. I once had a love scene, not a sex scene but some heavy action, with a guy who was gayer than a Fire Island hooker. We were not into each other at all. If he'd been straight, we wouldn't have been interested in one another. But every night, his cock would get hard as a rock during the scene. The second time it happened, he apologized profusely, because he was a good actor and a good egg who wasn't interested in making things awkward. I knew he was gay, he was not closeted at all about it. For whatever reason, his body was betraying his mind. Similarly, I've been a bit dewy during certain scenes for no particular reason. The sex was still totally fake though.

However, despite the on-stage sex being fake and the two actors being actors and not people in love or lust, sometimes doing things onstage with someone makes an actor get the hots for them offstage. It can be normal or it can be creepy depending on various factors. I'm sorry to say that in my experience, it tends to be guys becoming smitten with gals, but that's not always the case. It's like any other crush, usually. You can sometimes sense it, but many times no one acts on it.

When people do act on it, it can be unpleasant. For one, if the feelings are in no way reciprocal and the object of affection isn't even interested at all, then all the unpleasant unrequited love stuff can happen, plus it can make the onstage stuff incredibly awkward. Either the affected (shorthand for the actor who has the crush) tries to make the onstage things more real, or becomes incredibly mechanical, and either way it's not good news.

Then of course, as in our present case, we have a crush which progresses to physical affection (i.e. they get it on in real life) which is common enough, and doesn't really require any onstage romance at all. Show romances are incredibly common. Theatre people are kinda slutty, I'm afraid. And all show romances carry the threat of awkwardness. But a show romance which mirrors an onstage romance has the potential to be really awkward, particularly if things don't go well offstage.

Last night, things didn't go all that well offstage. Pretty much everyone in the cast and crew knew that something had gone on between Simon and Andie, and Andie was obviously totally mortified that she'd done it. She definitely couldn't look me in the eye, not that I spent a lot of time trying to catch her gaze. I gather that after I went home, they fucked at least once more, possibly sans condom. But whatever the case may be, it was bad enough that she'd done it with him, but with me involved, I think she just wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

They're both decent actors, so it didn't affect their performances much, but they didn't speak at all backstage and if you knew, you could see the awkwardness onstage too. I knew, so I saw it stick out like a sore thumb.

And then, lo and behold, after the show, off they went together to his place. Weird. But not that uncommon. I didn't press on them; maybe before the run is over they'll have me in. Obviously, the show romance blossomed. I felt okay about that because it meant that hopefully the initial awkwardness was over, but bad because while I'm coming down from stress-horny, I still wouldn't sneeze at another threesome. Instead, I got to go home alone, wake Sveta up even though I shouldn't have, and talk with her too long, keeping us both up, although she only missed lunch, I had a matinee the next day.

We tried a little phone sex, but it wasn't happening. She sent me a picture from her phone I'm not going to share, but rest assured that she's beautiful even when she's tired. That helped. We wound up with her listening while I masturbated, which isn't really phone sex but worked out okay. We may try it again. I'm not changing my stance on phone sex, but it's something we can do. Her roomie wasn't there, thank God, but Sveta didn't know when she'd be back, so there could be no fun on Sveta's end. I felt like a tool, but she said she liked it even if she couldn't actively participate. I told her that she had, repeat had, to find a lover with a single, even if that lover was just someone who would let Sveta come over and masturbate in his or her room. She giggled at that, but I'm serious. She needs to find some college booty, of either sex. She'll regret it if she doesn't. Maybe I need to visit her and help her out, be her wingman, something. Or she's got to get a new roomie, one who's never there, or who wants to join in, or who has a cute boyfriend and is interested in sharing. Something. My poor baby is dying from lack of attention.

Anyway, I couldn't sleep, woke up early enough to get a send-off fuck from the old man (who was anything but old this morning, let me tell you; I was dying of sleep deprivation and he was a spring chicken). Didn't expect anything to happen, and I was mostly right. I did talk with Simon, who said that things were going better between the two of them, which showed. Still, she isn't talking to me. Maybe she's jealous. She should be, because I gave Simon some speedy intermission head. Not something I often do, but it's a smallish cast and we had a place to ourselves and nothing to do for ten minutes. I don't like being the other woman, but in this case, I'm not really. It's a fucking show romance. It's just a fling. Plus, I want to get with her too, so I'm cool.

But no love for Lexi. Managed to surreptitiously rub a small O out during a quiet moment, but I could have really gone for some cock. Still, I didn't press my luck in the theatre, and Simon and Andie left shortly after the play, probably to go back to his place. Ah well. I can't really believe I lost out to her. Maybe I haven't. Maybe I was too aggressive, and he prefers submissive. If he'd caught me any other week, he would have gotten much more of that, but this week, the beast has been in heat.

Came home, had after-dinner sex with Dad, and now I'm writing this because despite my exhaustion I can't fall asleep. Hope it wasn't too boring.

News As It Happens

Back from a good evening. Fairly drunk, so you'll have to forgive me if I shlurrrrr. Okay, not really that drunk. I've had a few drinks more than I would if I weren't looking to get drunk, but not enough to be so out of it that I start doing really stupid things.

After a really stressed-out week, I wanted to let my hair down a little. So I went out with some actors. Slumming, I know. No, only kidding; to any of the actor-types in the audience, I love you kids, particularly when you're buying. Simon was there, and they were all feeling good and charitable toward techies, so they were buying, and I wasn't telling them to stop. They started singing at a certain point, and God help me I joined in. Fortunately, no one in the place minded.

I believe I've fucked Simon every single day this week. Not a record for me or anything, but I've been horny as I mentioned last time, and he's been willing enough. Last night he actually waited around for me to finish some things up and then when everyone else had gone (and don't think that I didn't feel a little awkward with him obviously waiting for me) we found a quiet spot in the soft goods (that's fabric and curtains for those who wonder), made a little nest, and had a wonderful, passionate, face to face and slow and steady session. We were just sort of curled up together with our hips pressing together, in and out, very different from the frantic actions of the previous sessions, but it was great because it was pretty much exactly what I needed to get over some really pain-in-the-ass problems. The only bad thing is that somehow my panties got lost. Maybe he stole them. If so, he can have them. If not, I hope no one finds them soon. Probably they're buried in with the fabric, and some day down the line someone will stumble across them and wonder what the hell was going on.

He said he had been keyed up too... because apparently he's got a bit of a crush on the girl he's making out with on stage. Know how I said it's not romantic to do things on stage. Well, I was mostly telling the truth, but sometimes (and I hate to say it, but it's usually the guys who are guilty of this) one party will become smitten with the other party. Usually, that makes doing it on stage awkward and clumsy, and even if it doesn't the act on stage is usually not what the smitten party is looking for, but it can lead to complications. Very little good can come of it.

Of course, I told him he should ask her out. I am not a font of good advice most times, particularly when in the throes of passion or afterglow. I joked again about getting her and me together.

Tonight... yeah, he was putting the moves on her and she wasn't interested. Not at first. Because she's probably just as aware as I am that romance on stage doesn't usually translate to romance off-stage. Or maybe she wasn't into him. But the liquor flowed, and she had more of it than I did and is a smaller woman anyway, and I felt a little sorry for him and started helping him out chatting her up, and when the party broke up, they were definitely heading for the door together. That is, until he told me to come on, grab my coat (as it were, since I didn't wear a coat) and come back to his place with them.

Stone-cold sober I am not one to refuse an invite like that. I don't think it registered with her (and I've got to give her a name now I guess, so we'll call her Andie, short for Andrea) until she got out the door with me tagging along. Then she wanted to know what I was doing. I said I'd been invited back to Simon's place for more drinks. Not really a lie. She frowned, then giggled and said, "I don't think he wants to drink anything." If I were a responsible adult and she were younger than I am, I would have stopped things, or at least slowed things down, because she was plastered. But I'm not, and she's got to be five years older than I am, maybe more, so who am I to tell people they can't have a good time, even if they regret it in the morning?

Instead, I whispered back, "Yeah, I know. But there's only one of him and two of us. How will he ever choose?" I've found it easiest to let people think they're making their own choices. If I hint and tease enough, they usually do what I want anyway. No, that's not true, but it is in this type of situation. She was going to get fucked that night, and whether or not I was involved too was something I wanted her to believe she'd decided. I am not without a level of experience in this regard. I am certainly not a player or an expert at seduction, but I can make an evening pleasant, particularly if I've been helped by other people's overindulgence.

She giggled again and slurred, "Why should have have to choose?" Bingo. Contrary to popular belief, the instant we decided to share a guy, we didn't begin lezzing out or anything. If anything, that decided, her attention turned back to him. Fortunately, the walk to his place from where we'd been drinking was short, otherwise I think she would have embarrassed herself, or maybe I would have. I was drunker then than I am now, certainly.

We got in, and they were making out sloppily, and for a few minutes it seemed like I might be in serious third-wheel country, and my cooch was starting to resign herself to an evening of manual stimulation, when Simon broke away and said, "Andie, Lexi's already said she'd be up for a threesome, how about you?" Actors can, on occasion, be refreshingly direct. Most other people would have worked around to the topic gradually or never. If I were romantically interested in Simon, I might be insulted, since the implication was that he'd had me and thus he could do what he wanted with me, so there was no need to ask. But since I'm not, and I had in fact said I'd be happy to have any kind of sex he wanted, really, it was nice and direct.

She gave me a look and wilted a little. "I'm not into girls," she said, blushing. "I've never done anything like that before."

"Hun, I bet Simon hasn't either," I said with a cheeky grin. And he didn't immediately provide proof otherwise, which just confirms my suspicions that he isn't as hot shit as he'd like us to believe. But whatever. "It doesn't matter. I'm not looking for anything. I just think we can have some fun with him, okay?" I put my arm on her shoulders and decided to chance it and give her a peck on the cheek. "I'm not expecting you to eat me out or anything."

She laughed nervously, but looked a little relieved, more so when I didn't immediately start making out with her. "Can I go first? I've had an itch all night." And with that, things became much less formal.

She did go first. Her body isn't bad at all, not terrific but I really shouldn't judge. She has a C-section scar, so there's obviously a story there, but fortunately I didn't have to hear it. She was shy at first about taking her clothes off, but when I started to take mine off, she got the hint. I put the condom on him, then stroked her belly while he pressed himself between her spread thighs. She's a screamer. Lots of actresses are, in my experience. It's the dramatic flair. Seeing as I've done a bit of acting myself, I shouldn't generalize like this, but hey, I'm not really being nasty. It's just observations.

Despite the loud moans, she wasn't cumming. She stopped making noise when I started stroking her clit, but pretty soon she had her hand on my hip and was begging for more. I kissed Simon and stroked her clit with one hand while massaging her ample breasts, slightly droopy but with perfect perky nipples, with the other. But she didn't make it over the edge before he pulled out, pulled off the condom, and pressed my head down to take a load in the mouth. I kept diddling as I swallowed, then since she was begging, pleading that she was so close, I didn't think she'd mind, so I bent my head a little more and started sucking her clit between my lips while I pressed my finger into her. She was a basic puzzle; find the right spot and stroke it and you're guaranteed an orgasm, not stellar, but not mediocre either. If she'd been more open to a little experimentation, I could probably have brought her off much better, but I managed to get that spot that the cock just wasn't hitting, and she screamed and came, and then almost immediately started closing her legs.

She wasn't comfortable with the situation. I got up and tried to apologize, but she said she just wasn't used to it. I think a bit of the booze was wearing off and she was feeling out of her depth. I reassured her that I wasn't expecting any quid pro quo, and she lay back and then smiled and said, "Actually, it was nice." Maybe a convert after all. Can't proceed to quickly.

Simon was half-staff already, watching me lick her pussy, and I sat back expecting a quick recovery, which was made quicker when Andie sat up and said that even if she wasn't quite ready to try me out, she could at least get Simon ready for me. She gives good head, I'll give her that. Practice, I'm assuming. I respect experts, and while she did some things differently than I do, she was definitely getting a rise out of him. Gave me a grin and said, "Watch this," and then swallowed him down to the base and licked his balls. Very hot. I'm not saying I was as impressed as I'm sure she wished I would be, but it was still impressive.

I was a bit afraid he'd stick with her and just cum in her mouth, or at least get so close that he'd cum before I had any satisfaction, but once he was good and hard, she put the condom on him and then sat back and watched the music. I got off a bit on being watched, I don't mind saying. It wasn't a classic threesome, really more like taking it in turns, but it turned my crank. I even teased her until she came over a little and put her hand just above my pussy and felt his cock going in and out, until I came, which startled her a little and she shrank back and blushed.

Then it was her turn for a cum banquet. Simon was going to go up and give me a second helping, but I told her to get what she deserved, so Andie got on her hands and knees right over my snatch and sucked the load out of him like a pro. Then she came up and lay next to me and we both enjoyed the moment for a bit, until she rolled over and awkwardly tried to give me a kiss and a grope. Nothing worse than being viewed as an obligation. I think she felt like she owed me. I told her she didn't, that I didn't want her to do anything but enjoy herself. I've been in similar situations a few times, where the other woman feels like she needs to get involved with me even though she really doesn't want to. It's not a good situation for anyone. I try to be gentle but firm; I don't want to fuck someone who's not into it.

Simon said that was as good a time as any to get some drinks, so he went, buck naked, into his kitchen to get some, and I sat and felt a little awkward and a long way from being satisfied. I confess, while I'm not putting my nose up at any kind of sex if it's good, I wish there had been more of a threesome atmosphere, particularly when Simon came back, handed me my drink, and proceeded to ask Andie if she'd like another go. He ate her out this time, something which I confess I've never had from him. We've skipped over that part because I usually want cock right away. From her reactions, he wasn't going badly. Then he pulled on another condom, flipped her over, giggling, and pressed in from behind.

Now, if it had been a proper threesome, I could have been 69ing her as this happened, and she would have eaten me out and I could have sucked him off occasionally or at least licked his balls, plus I could have licked her too. As it was, I got to watch for a while. Then Simon said he'd always wanted to try two girls at once, so he lay back and let Andie ride him (drunkenly, which is really no way to ride a cock) while I sat on his face and let him taste me. He wasn't bad at all. I came, not a huge one, but a nice middle-of-the-session O. He couldn't say anything because I was on his face, so he shot his load in the condom, and I don't think she got off again, which is too bad because I could easily have gotten her there.

And then she announced that she was going to sleep on the couch, and he rolled over and said he was going to take a nap too, and damn it, I had to leave. So I left and came home. A good night. Not a great night, but who knows, maybe tomorrow I can convince them to do it again, only this time I'm definitely getting farther with Andie. Sveta's asleep, or I would have called her to talk about it, because I know she'd enjoy it. Now, she can read it with everyone else. Sorry sweetie.

Anyway, not the perfect evening, but enough to tide me over. Not that I'm not currently typing with one hand in my panties (I didn't lose them this time). Now I must go and capture the flag.

Why Are Redheads So Naturally Hot

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Have I Mentioned Stress?

I believe I may have mentioned that stress does things to me. Sometimes, stress dries up my sex drive completely (or as completely as it gets, and usually the rest of it is taken care of by having no time to indulge anyway). Sometimes, on the other hand, even though I have virtually no time to indulge, stress cranks me up to the point where I'd sleep with a troll if he put a bag over his head.

I am currently in that second state. Before and after rehearsals, I'm working my ass off, but during rehearsals, I'm sitting around in the light booth pressing a button every few minutes. And I'm not helped by the fact that Simon (remember Simon) is on stage, shirtless, looking just the worst kind of tempting. There's a scene where he and the female lead are getting hot and heavy (we're talking kissing, not stripping or coitus or anything like that), and I am so incredibly jealous of her that they can probably hear my teeth grinding from the stage, and I'm in the balcony.

As an aside, there's nothing sexy about having to do a sexy scene on stage (well, nearly all the time anyway). It's all business. At least, that's how it should be. So doubtless there's no enjoyment going on as they get hot and heavy; they're probably trying to remember their next lines. Still, for the bored and horny watcher, it's like a flame to a moth.

I guess what I'm trying to work toward is the admission that... well, I was weak, and I have no other outlets, what with not being home and Sveta not being here and... a few nights ago I went back to Simon's apartment and we fucked like rabbits. Not like rabbits, actually; I would have worn a rabbit out. I'm not in love with this guy at all. I don't even know that I like him that much. He's not horrible, but he's an actor, he's fairly shallow, but damn is he good to look at, and he's not bad in bed either. Not that we made it to bed immediately. The first time, I pinned him up against his wall (I told you, I am feeling like a goddamn werewolf bitch in heat right now) and about sucked the tongue out of his mouth, which gave him the general idea, then he hoisted me up, got his knee between my thighs and spread them, and started just rubbing my crotch with his leg until I came in my panties.

Since I was working, I had on pants, not a skirt, but the pants came down around my ankles in a hurry after that, and he pressed into me from behind, pressing my face up against the wall, and just fucked me raw. I don't know how he managed to get a condom on while I wasn't looking, but lo and behold, after another Lexi O, he pulled out, pulled off the condom, and gave me a mouthful of cream, which tasted like the greatest thing ever at that point. I'd been all day just wishing I could fuck something, anything, and this was great.

And we didn't stop. Clothes hit floor, we were naked and headed to the bedroom, and I gave him head so he didn't really get flaccid, just got less hard and then harder again, and then I lay back on the bed and played with a nipple in one hand and my clit with the other until he pulled on another raincoat (I would die for a creampie, but not really, and he was taking charge on that front, so good for him) and then lifted my hips off the bed and was basically fucking himself with me. He's strong, I'll give him that. He held me up and raised and lowered my lower half on his cock. I hadn't been taken like that in a long time.

The second and third times were broken up by a space to get a drink, and then I was back on the bed playing with myself like an insatiable slut (which I guess I was at that point) until he got to watch me bring myself off, then asked if I was the type of girl who went in for anal. You all know the answer to that; I just rolled over and stuck my ass in the air. He spanked me while fucking me, which I'm not into, and I told him so, and to his credit he listened and stopped. Sorry, just not really my thing. I am in no way a pain slut. But having a cock in my ass after a long time was enough to bring me off, a long, hard cum that at some point in the middle must have made him cum in his condom, but I didn't care even when he slipped out of me; I had my fingers on the joy button by then and was lost in space.

After that, it looked like I was going to spend the night, but I didn't want to. I wanted to fuck, not sleep, and he looked like he wasn't ready for another, so I told him I'd see him later, pulled on my clothes (my panties were clammy from all the juice that had gone into them during the day) and went home.

And if that were the end of it, I'd chastise myself and be done with it. Only it wasn't. The next night, he was going out with some of the other actors, and I practically dragged him into the light booth when he invited me and started pulling down his pants before he could say anything. He went out a few minutes later with a satisfied smile on his face, and I wasn't interested in partying, just in tasting the remnants of cum on my tongue from the BJ.

Then last night, we were done early, and he said he wanted to go out again, but I convinced him that I'd let him do pretty much whatever he wanted to me if he took me back to his place instead. I let him spank me. My ass hurt afterward, but I came quite a few times, and I was at least momentarily sated by the time he shot his fourth, very weak load onto my back.

But tonight takes the fucking cake. I am simultaneously pissed off at myself and incredibly turned on (and still horny as hell). I will not say I've never had sex in the theater before. Far from it. But I had some work to do, everyone else was leaving for the night, and Simon came up and asked how long I'd be. When I told him I might be a while, he asked if I wanted to take a break before I started. We were all alone in the building (they love me, so they trust me, plus when I do lights I usually have to work alone), on stage, and guess what, there's a sofa in the play... and we christened it.

There's a stain on the center cushion now. I turned it over, and it probably won't amount to much, but there was a wet spot where my ass was sitting as he fucked me. Very unprofessional, but as I said, stress does bad things to me, and I've been quite stressed recently. It's good to have a gig, but this gig has been stressful, not super-stressful, but enough that it turns me into a raving lunatic, apparently.

And you know what? I'm going back tomorrow, and I've told Simon that we'll find some time to fuck again. Because I need it. In fact, I've as much as said that if Simon wants to bring another girl home with him, I'll join in. I haven't had a threesome in a while. If Sveta were here, I'd bring her over.

Sveta knows about all this, of course. After the first night, I talked with her about it. She's just sorry that she's not here to satisfy me, which I think is sweeter than anything. She knows that if she ever gets an itch that needs scratching, she can find a boy toy too. I wish she would; it would do her a world of good. Who knows what will happen?

I waited to blog about this until now because I'm not super proud of it, and I haven't had a tremendous amount of time. It's been a while since I had a whirlwind show romance (and I use the word "romance" without any implications of actual romance) and I confess that while I feel a little wrong, it's really nice. After the show finishes, we'll go our separate ways. He hasn't been clingy or needy; if anything, I've been more needy, not that he complains about my physical needs. We had a date, that didn't really work, and now we're fucking. I'm okay with that.

Sorry that this post is somewhat frenetic and detail-low. I'm tired, horny, stressed, and over-worked and under-paid. That's what I give these days: frenetic and detail-low. Foreplay has gone right down the toilet.

TMI - I Guess Not the Last One

Apparently it was all just a ploy for attention. But what isn't, really? As always, meme courtesy of TMI.

1. For self-arousal, if you could reach any part of your body with your mouth, which part would you like to reach and why?

Come on, this really needs to be asked? I'd probably want to be able to eat myself out. I'm not scared of tasting myself. But it'd still just be masturbation. I've never actually seen in the flesh someone who could auto-oralize, but I know they exist, and again, it's cool and all, but it's just masturbation with flair.

2. If you reached that part of your body, how often and how long would you want to stay there?

If it weren't as easy and comfortable as using my fingers, probably not that long or often. I mean, it's hard to watch porn with your head between your legs. It's hard to type that way. It's hard to do a lot of things. I'd probably just trot it out as a trick at parties. Because I know I'd want to see myself do it, so to be fair, I'd do it for others, just as an icebreaker. And then I'd ask for volunteers to finish the job.

3. If the opportunity arose, what would you like to do to someone else that you have never been game to try before?

To someone else? That makes it sound less experiential and more abusive. There are a few positions I've never tried, I guess. Honestly, anything I haven't done already and would try is probably not for the blog anyway. I've been game to try things and have just never done them before. Actually, I'm game for a lot of things, some I've done, some not. If I'm not game for it, I probably don't want to try it if the opportunity arose.

4. You have been selected to swap one of your organs with another member of the opposite sex. What would you swap and why? Who would you choose as the organ donor?

I confess, I'd like to try out having a cock. But I don't want to swap. I want to have a cock and a pussy at the same time. So I guess I'd offer anyone who'd take it my pinkie toes in exchange for the rental of their cock. Not fair? Okay, I'd trade sex organs with a guy, for the evening. Hell, then we could fuck, for starters. Of course, I'd want proof that he had the stamina of a rhino, and in return I'd offer up proof of my astounding tightness and ease of climax. We'd probably have to fuck once before the deal was done, just to prove the point. Then we'd fuck again after the switch, and then invite in the harem.

Seriously, I would like to try out having a cock. I'd swap brains, jump into a man's body for a day. I'd like to feel how it feels on the other side, how penetration really feels to the guy, how a male orgasm feels, how it feels to ejaculate. I'm perfectly happy being a woman, but my curiosity is piqued with regard to how the other half lives. And just think of what it would do to my technique. I'd know how a guy feels, so I'd know how to make him feel good. Although I flatter myself to think I know something about that already.

5. Overnight you have a beauty sleep and inexplicably awaken at dawn having now turned into the most beautiful person on the planet. What would you do differently for the next 24 hours?

Possibly take horrible advantage of people. Probably parlay my looks into plenty of nookie. Other than that, while I'm not saying I wouldn't like to look better than I do, that's really for shallow, self-absorbed reasons, and if I suddenly became the most beautiful woman in the world for 24 hours, I doubt I'd have much time to do anything else.

Bonus Question: You are noticed by a talent scout and invited to star in your own x-rated movie for world wide distribution. You are asked to write the plot. Describe your movie plot in one sentence of no more than 20 words.

"Hatshepsut, first female Pharaoh of Egypt, indulges her lusts by taking on all comers, with period-accurate costumes."

Oh yeah baby. I'm a little obsessed. But I would love to see some sexy she-Pharaoh porn.

My runner-up might be: "1000-member orgy in which Lexi takes center stage, filmed in the style of Busby Berkley, all-singing-all-dancing-all-coitus." That's 22 words if you count hyphenated words as their separate parts, but it only cheats a little.

Gentlemen Prefer Blondes

Not me though. I like redheads. Still, as an aggregating principle, that all the women in these videos have blonde or blondish hair serves well enough, I guess.

First up: http://www.tube8.com/anal/beautiful-blonde-threesome-anal-creem-pia/226179/

This is purest porn. There is nothing amateur about it. I don't personally understand the appeal of bleaching and tanning, nor do I get what men find attractive about buck teeth, but hey, the woman's body is very nice. Legs that go all the way up, and I find that very attractive sometimes. It's a threesome, with DP and anal and creampies and such, and that's good enough for me.

Second: http://www.tube8.com/amateur/german-amateur-couple/145505/

I don't know whether this is actually amateur or not. Hell, I don't really know if it's really German or not. I can't say that I care. This woman is gorgeous, and while she only gets one guy instead of two and things are a little more normal in terms of sex, it's still worth watching because she's gorgeous. An ass made for nibbling at, a pretty little pink pussy, two perky boobs (which may be fake, but if so they're well done fakes), a cute little tummy... yeah, I'd go blonde for her. A nice visible creaming on the pubic region at the end, which doesn't really count as a creampie in my book but makes for a better shot. I wish she took off the dress, and I wish there was more missionary, and another guy, but it's good anyway.

Lastly: http://www.xvideos.com/video61330/18_year_old_french_girl_is_doing_it_for_her_first_time

I can tell you that it's French. Beyond that, I have no idea. I do know that while I ordinarily don't find tan lines attractive (well, I don't find them more attractive than without, the way some people seem to), on this girl they are. If it really is her first time, that's too bad because it doesn't seem like that good a first time. Your first time really should be face to face and without a pair of jeans tangling up your legs. It's not fake rape or anything, it's just not the way I'd choose my first time to be. Ah well. She's still cute as the dickens though. I confess, I do enjoy innocence (as I've mentioned) and she looks all cute and innocent, and that turns me on. I'm not a good person.

TMI - The Last One?

Seems like TMI might stop. And while I do mock the questions, that would be too bad. Ah well. I guess I'll just have to come up with something else for filler. What? Make me actually do work? Never!

1. Have you had sex with another person in 2010? Have you passed on an opportunity to sex with another person in 2010?

Oh yeah, I've had sex with another person in 2010. And to be honest, I don't think I've passed on an opportunity, because I don't think there have been that many opportunities I would pass on. I don't fuck everyone who offers, but this year as yet has been pretty mundane in terms of sex. At least at the time I write this, which is several weeks ago.

2. What is the funniest thing you have ever said or done during sex? (Orgasmic facial expressions do not count.)

Said: I've told funny stories and jokes with a cock inside me before. I talk while having sex. Real conversations. But that doesn't count. I guess once I called a boyfriend "Captain Ook Ook." That story is long and not really all that funny if you weren't in on the joke, but it's a funny thing to call someone who's cock-deep in you.

Done: Well, I believe I mentioned that I've farted during sex, which wasn't funny to me but I suppose could have been funny to an observer, if I had been a character in a movie or something. I giggle a lot. And I once fell off the bed, but I don't entirely count that because it wasn't totally me doing it.

3. What is the first thing you notice about a member of the opposite sex?

Opposite sex? The chin, I think. I'm not joking; I notice a man's chin first on his face. I don't care about the chin, really, and it usually doesn't affect my judgment of a guy at all, but I'd say that's the first thing I notice. Possibly the hands, but I've usually noticed the chin first.

4. What is the best pick-up line you have ever heard? Every used? Ever been used on you?

I am not being modest or proud when I say that I don't think I use "pick-up lines" per se. And I really haven't had that many lines said to me, unless you count normal conversation as a line, or "Hey, you want to go in the other room and have sex?" That works on me alarmingly well. My favorite pick-up line is, "Nice shoes. Wanna fuck." But I've never actually heard it used. It's just goofy.

5. Where is the most unique [place, which was left out of the original which made it kind of a strange question] you have ever had sex?

I've done this one. Plus, things can't be more unique than other things. Either it's unique or it isn't. I've had sex in some odd places, sure, but to quantify them, to list them in order of oddity, is too much for me.

Bonus (as in optional): Do you pee in the shower? If so, has any Sig-O known that you pee in the shower? Has any Sig-O peed in the shower?

I do pee in the shower. I don't know if a lot of women do; it seems to be more of a guy thing. But I actually enjoy standing up to pee sometimes, and I'm not likely to do it anywhere but the shower or a body of water (yes, I've peed in the ocean as well). I sometimes like to feel it trickle down my leg. What can I say, I'm a little strange. Not always, but sometimes. And sometimes it's the morning and I'm cold and don't feel like getting out of the shower, but I have to piss like a racehorse, so I just go while I'm showering. Maybe it's a bit disgusting. I have no real problem with urine, provided it's not stale and in clothing or carpets.

And now Sveta knows I pee in the shower if I hadn't told her before. I don't think I've ever done it in front of her. We've never tried anything watersports-related, but I'm open to the possibility if she ever wants to. Other sig-Os have certainly known I pee in the shower, because I've peed on them on occasion, by request.

As far as sig-Os peeing in the shower, I've done some watersports stuff, and I prefer to do that in the shower because cleanup is easier. On an everyday-basis, I don't know whether my sig-Os pee in the shower. I can't say it bothers me one way or the other. Maybe I've just grossed a lot of you out. Ah well.

Working

I am up to my tits in work at the moment, hence the lack of postage. If I were international mail, I would definitely be held up at the distribution center. I think I keep up enough to be local mail though. Wow, that was an incredibly stupid joke/pun.

I saw Simon again this weekend. It was a bit awkward, and oddly enough that's a good thing. If he hadn't felt awkward about it, I would have labeled him a jackass player and moved on. But either he felt awkward about having fucked a coworker of sorts, or he felt awkward about the way things turned out, or possibly both. I know I was feeling a little of column A, a little of column B.

If it had worked out really well and then been really awkward the next time we met, that would be one thing. But we were both at work, so to speak, so it's allowed to be a bit awkward. I know a few people were nodding and winking and knowing that something went on between the two of us, which only served to make me feel more embarrassed about the whole thing. But I don't think he's the jackass I've perhaps made him out to be. I might get another evening of enjoyment out of him if I play my cards right. Can't say that I care one way or the other, except he was good enough to go back for seconds. And I like sex. News flash, there.

Sveta just came through mid-terms, which means she was stressed as hell and we had a few spats over the phone, just little shit which doesn't matter. It's okay. Fighting is fine, as long as it's just fussin' and not feudin'. All is forgiven. I can't wait until she gets the time to come home again. Yes, she's coming home to me. My house is now her home. I declare it. So shall it be written, so shall it be done. Also, she thinks she did well on the tests, which is good too. Soon she'll be better-educated than I am. Never thought I'd be the dumb one in a relationship, but apparently I'll have to go for barefoot and pregnant in front of the stove while she brings home the bacon. I'm okay with that.

Other than that, not much to report. Once I get more time, I hope to be able to do some more writing, but for right now, I'm dreaming about doing work, waking up, and doing work. It's a non-stop litany of work. Hoo-freaking-ray.

For the More Adventurous Among Us

Because I know I get readers who are more into various lifestyles than I am, I offer these two videos. I know, they're pretty "vanilla" as it were for the initiate, but I'm not all that into bondage and submission. I just happened upon them, thought they were relatively sexy, and offer them as a propitiation to the kink gods. Or something.

http://www.tube8.com/amateur/scene-slut-fucked-and-facialed/202821/

I enjoy sexy underwear. The girl is attractive, the bondage is tame, and basically the only comment I have is that it's pretty silly that she keeps her sunglasses on the whole time. I wish we got to see her breasts, because they look like they might be nice.

http://www.tube8.com/amateur/ladder-fuck/203637/

This one, on the other hand, seems a bit more realistic. There's some spanking if you like that (I'm not into it myself, really, but the girl is cute), some commands, some roughness... yeah, it's still pretty tame I'm sure. I enjoy it for the adorable female presence, even though I must admit I want to rush in and protect her from the guy. Ah well. That's my instinct. Also, I want to rush in and take off her top, because once again, no boobs. Still, her butt is very cute.

Who knows, maybe with a little exploration I could get into a bit of submission. But not a tremendous amount. I'm too ornery. Anyway, I hope you enjoy. Just a snapshot of my viewing.

Sveta Is a Trooper

When we last left our heroes, Lexi was watching a DVD quietly so as not to disturb Sveta's beautifully-sleeping form lying on her chest. But eventually I did have to disturb her because I was wide awake and the movie was over and I was starting to lose feeling in my limbs. I can't stay lying in the same place for too long. I get fidgety.

So I had to wake her up, which was brutal because believe me, I really just wanted to stay and watch her sleep forever. When I said her name, she snuggled even more into me, which made me almost give up and resign myself to permanent paralysis. But then she blinked her eyes, looked at the TV, and asked what time it was.

Fortunately, she can get back to sleep. We went upstairs and I tucked her into bed and then spent the rest of the night trying unsuccessfully to fall asleep. I had to get up early for work, but nothing. Couldn't sleep. I wound up getting up at dawn, eating breakfast, watching something, killing time, and hoping that I wouldn't crash five seconds before I had to leave. Then I took a shower just as Dad was getting up, told him I didn't really have time for anything, and that he should save it for Sveta, who needs hard cock much more than I do.

Then off to work. I'm informed that while I was away, Sveta got a delightful morning fuck from Daddy, complete with a rejuvenated sperm count and orgasms all around. Then she did her homework like the good student she is. Honestly, I wouldn't have been doing homework if I had been in her shoes. She did admit that she had taken a few breaks with some toys from my collection. I let her take her favorite vibe back to school with her. She can use it discreetly I think.

It took forever for me to get home. I mean, I was exhausted, doing manual labor, not wanting to be there... multiply real time by about five million and you have a general idea. Oy. And when I finally got back, all I really wanted to do was crawl into bed. But I stayed up for dinner, then was falling asleep in front of the TV with Sveta, so it was her turn to suggest we turn in. It was later than I thought I'd make it too, so in the end we were able to curl up and snuggle in bed, which led to some light fingering but nothing serious. I was almost too tired to feel arousal, that's how tired I felt. In the end, she told me to lie back and enjoy it, and treated me to a very nice O with her tongue, after which I dimly remember her crawling back up and wrapping us in the blanket.

The next morning, we woke up together, didn't have a lot of time because once again I had to work (the theatre doesn't believe in weekends), but we managed to get in a shower together, and after I'd cum and washed off, I revved her up in time for Dad to come into the bathroom, bend her over the side, and thrust his cock into her dripping pussy. I stuck around for a while, longer than I should have, licking Dad's balls and teasing Sveta's click from underneath, then I had to rush to get ready.

Sveta, bless her, stayed later than she planned, and it took me forever to get home again, and by the time I was back, we didn't go upstairs, we just left her baggage on the floor near the door, and I pulled down her jeans and panties and bent her over the couch and licked her from behind until she was dripping like an old faucet. She didn't want to get her pants went again, so finally she pushed me away, practically ripped her pants off, and then lay back with her legs spread, just waiting for me to bring her over the edge. I could taste her on my tongue for hours afterward, after we'd pulled ourselves together, I'd taken her back, returned home, and felt all empty inside. I wish I hadn't had to work. It was a bitch. But Friday evening was wonderful, and even if it just made me miss her terribly, I wouldn't trade it for the world.

TMI Deadly Sins

Once again, back to the bin.

1. LUST: Besides your current Significant Other, for whom do you lust or have you lusted?

See everything I've ever written on this blog, plus anything I'll ever write. Lust is definitely my deadly sin. A catalogue of even the highlights could take years.

2. GLUTTONY: What food brings out your inner glutton?

Chocolate. Absolutely. I like other food, but I could eat myself to death on chocolate if I broke down.

3. GREED: What are you greedy for?

Sex. Money (I'm not proud of that, sure, but I don't have much so I pinch pennies and wish I had more even though I have more than many people, I'm sure). Attention (I try hard to keep this one under wraps, but I can't lie and say I don't like attention). Approbation.

4. SLOTH: What is your plan for an ideal day of sloth?

To be able to actually sleep through an entire day, like the dead, no waking up because things hurt or having to go to the bathroom or eat or anything, not because I'm sick or exhausted, just to lie in bed and be asleep for a whole day and miss it completely, without realizing it, without worrying about it. I'm sure you were expecting something sexy, but really, I just want to sleep through it.

5. WRATH: Describe a time that you opened up a can of whoop ass on someone.

No thanks. I'm not proud of losing my temper, and because I've always been bigger than the other kids, I sometimes do things which I don't mean to be violent but which people take as violence. I don't like violence. I might contemplate it, even do it, but I don't like dwelling on it.

6. ENVY: Whom or what do you envy? Why?

I envy lots of people. I don't think it's unhealthy to envy, unless envy turns to hatred. I can say, "Gee, I wish I was a bit more like X," without wishing for X to fail or become a bit more like me. It can be a raising experience, a desire to raise the joint standard. But some people take envy and wish, instead, "Gee, I wish X were worse than me." That's not healthy. Maybe I'm not using envy the right way. But I do wish I could be like some people. I envy looks, or attitude, or success. It comes from not being completely happy with myself, I guess. But if it makes me strive to improve myself, I don't see the harm. Or rather, I see less harm in it than if it made me strive to destroy others.

7. PRIDE: Have you ever had to swallow your pride? What are you proud of?

Yes, I have had to swallow my pride. Also, not a pleasant memory. I didn't start this blog to psychoanalyze myself, so fuck it, I'm done with that.

I'm proud of things I've done. It's a displaced pride, sure, because one should be proud of oneself, not one's accomplishments, but hey, I guess it's pride in oneself through one's accomplishments. Or something.

This was a really dumb one, and I'm sorry for that. Maybe I wouldn't have done it at all, but I'm running low on my backlog and there haven't been any other interesting memes I've seen recently.

No Time For Blogging, Dr. Jones

So aside from an automatically-posted PotD post, I haven't blogged in several days. I didn't even turn my computer on for two days straight. What can I say. I was busy, I didn't have the energy for blogging, not much of anything happened...

Except for Sveta coming down to visit on Friday evening and staying until Sunday night!

Did I have you going for a minute? I'm a tease, let's face it. At least this time I was teasing about boring things and serious about exciting things.

I wasn't really expecting the visit until she called Friday and asked me if I could come pick her up. What she would have done if I'd said no, or had been out of town, I don't know. I love the impulse though, obviously. So I hopped in my car and went and picked her up at the station, which isn't so much of a schlep that I would have minded even if she hadn't been a bundle of coed sex.

We barely made it out of the station. Seriously. It's been so long since she's gotten any, and so long since we've seen each other, that I had to fend her off (which was hard for me to do because she wanted it but so did I), and then only until we were in the car. The light had faded, we weren't in plain view, and she hopped into my lap facing me, grinding her hips against me, giving me kisses all over my face while she unbuttoned my blouse and started copping a serious feel. Since I wasn't wearing any underwear, it wasn't hard for her at all.

It was cramped being in the car, but we didn't give a shit. Being in a cardboard box with my sweetie would have been fun at that point. I had my hands down the back of her pants, cupping her ass, sliding fingers forward under her panties to stroke the tender parts between her legs, even cheekily running a finger around her asshole until she almost begged me to finger her butt.

She was wearing a sweatshirt so I couldn't get at the goodies of her top half, so I made up for that by driving her crazy below the equator. She was bumping and grinding on me until I was afraid for the suspension of my car. She pinched my nipples harder than she's ever done before, almost painful actually, which I'm not into, but I let her because I knew she wasn't trying to hurt me. Plus, I was pretty occupied between fingering both her nethers and sucking on her tongue until I was sure I was pulling it out by the tonsils.

Her eyes opened really wide and I felt her shake and then get this really shocked look on her face, and she leaped up like a scalded cat and screamed, "Oh shit!" The poor thing came in her pants, and believe me when I say that for her, that's no laughing matter. She got beet red, looked like she wanted to crawl into a hole and die, and I confess that I had to restrain myself a little because my first impulse was to laugh at the humor. It wasn't funny to her. She had this wet patch on her jeans, looked like she had an accident of the decidedly non-sexy kind.

But it was okay. After a moment, she laughed, and then I laughed, and she said, "A year ago, I would have died, right there." It's true. Now, of course, she said, "Driver, take me home; I fear I must change my soiled undergarments." In this adorable British posh voice too. I cracked up. God, I love her so much. I also wanted to tell her to shift her royal British arse back into my lap and forget going anywhere, because while it was hysterical, it was also incredibly sexy, and I was wound up. It's not often she cums before I do if we're both working at it.

My parents were out, so when we got home it was straight upstairs, into a hot shower for two, with plenty of giggling and naked parts flashing as clothes were stripped off and left on the floor. I wanted to take a shower because, as disgusting as this is, I hadn't had one yet that day. Sveta wanted to clean up too. And it was chilly, and a warm shower sounded nice even without the company.

I had her cumming like a trained monkey (well, that actually makes no sense, because I've never seen a monkey trained to cum), over and over. I made her cum three times in the shower, and two of those times were almost one long orgasm with two punctuation marks. Either she's been practicing, which she has a little, or absence makes the pussy grow more sensitive, or something. She still goes weak at the knees when she cums, so after the first time happened unexpectedly quickly, we shifted to more of a bath, sitting down, so she wouldn't slip and break her neck.

We were out of the shower, wearing nothing but towels and thinking about simply jumping into a warm bed and making it warmer, when Mom and Dad came home. They were surprised and delighted, of course, Dad in particular when Sveta ran up to him, dropped her towel, gave him a big kiss and hug, and then started pulling his cock out of his pants without letting him get his shoes off. He was barely in the door. God it was cute. I really do wish I could share pictures.

Eventually, things settled down to Sveta sitting on Dad's lap with his cock thrusting up into her, shifting her butt up and down every so often, while she told us all the news of college. Really, it's perfectly normal in my family to have conversations like that. I do it all the time. But when other people hear about it, they can't get over it. It's not really even fucking, it's like holding hands while talking, or sitting in someone's lap. It's just a connection.

Dad did finally want to finish things up, and he shifted the two of them around so he was gripping her waist from behind, and pumped into her cunt like piston until she was gasping and possibly having a multiple. Then he unloaded his balls (depleted, I'm sorry to say, because he'd already had once with me earlier, but how was I to know) into her, helped her lie back on the couch, gave her a big kiss, said, "Good to have you home, Lana [Note: I'm using "Lana" as a pet name because it is, for "Svetlana", from which "Sveta" comes. Obviously, my Dad doesn't call Sveta that, because it's an alias. He calls her by a pet name, the way he calls me Lexi, different from her actual name, so even though Sveta is already a pet name, I'm using Lana to distinguish. Just so you're totally confused.]," and headed up to bed. Mom gave us both a kiss and headed off too. Well, she gave Sveta a kiss, and me a kiss on the top of the head because I was already delving into Sveta's honey pot to clean out all the spunk I could.

That made her cum again (dear God, it's the truth; she was super-orgasmic Friday), then she looked about ready to keel over from a combination of pleasure and exhaustion, so I wrapped her in my arms, put a blanket over us, and put on whatever DVD was already in the player, which she saw 3 minutes of before falling asleep with her head on my chest. I missed that more than I can say. I'm missing it now.

Unfortunately, I had to work on the weekend, which meant that during the day I didn't get to see as much of her, and during the evening I was tired, but I'll try to give a rundown of the further adventures of Lexi and Lana (I'm not changing, but I like the alliteration) in an additional post.