How Are My Parents Doing?

An anonymous reader, via comment, asks, "[W]e haven't heard about your relations with your dad in a while. Is he ok? Any updates on your family would be , ahem, "stimulating" for this reader"

The main reason why I haven't talked about my father, or for that matter my mother, much since I've started back up with blogging is that there hasn't been much to tell. When Omicron hit the area, they kind of went back into lockdown because they're both highly comorbid. So I've seen them from a distance for the past few months. Basically, I've seen everyone except Sveta and Zoe from a distance the past few months, really.

They're both fine, just getting older and so with the accompanying medical issues. Dad can still get it up hard as a rock and he still loves his girls, but these days he lasts forever and sometimes can't cum at all. If he does go off, that's generally the ballgame, as it were. He's explored medical aids for this, but with some of his other medical issues they're not recommended, and anyway he can give much better than he gets, so no one is complaining.

Mom is doing okay too. She says her sex drive has slowed down a little, but that doesn't mean she didn't enjoy her outing with Liam back when it was still safe for her to do so. I think she'd like another helping of a young man who's dying to please her, personally, but who can blame her?

Sorry that's not a terribly exciting answer, but believe me, as soon as it's safe to start doing so again. Sveta and I both need a heaping helping of Daddy's love, and we'll definitely report on it when it happens.

Anonymous readers are just as welcome to ask questions as anyone else, and I read all my comments, so be like our anonymous friend and ask away. Or tell me what you'd like to hear about, if you don't have specific questions. I can't get Nielsen to return my calls about polling my readers for what they'd like to read, so I have to rely on you to tell me.

Interrupting

The other day, when we had a group of youngsters at work and they were much less supervised than I had expected, I managed to interrupt two of them in what they must have thought was a dark corner having some alone time. This meant that I came upon a youngster with his pants unzipped and his lady friend with panties around ankles, although they were hurriedly trying to pull themselves together and I don't know how far they'd gotten.

Situations like this always put me in a bit of a bind; on the one hand, I suppose that as a responsible adult the best thing for me to do would be to discourage continuance gently but firmly, but on the other hand I've been a youngster looking for a dark corner before. In this case they were all about assuring me that what I had plainly seen was not what was happening, until I stopped them.

"Kids, I'm not your mother," I said. "Do you have protection?"

They stammered something affirmative. 

"She's gonna get off too, right?"

He blushed about as red as she did and wouldn't meet my eye, but there was murmured agreement.

"Fine. I don't know where you're supposed to be, you don't need to tell me, but be back before you're missed, okay?" And I closed the door and left. They had found a dark corner, though I periodically check dark corners for reasons other than blue-balling youngsters, so I was pretty sure no one would interrupt them again, at least until I showed back up after a while to make sure they left.

And I was wound up as hell for the remainder of the day, wishing I had someone to take to a dark corner. But Aunt Lexi is a chill aunt, not a suicidal one, so I was in no way going to ask if they wanted company. When I got home Sveta barely got a word in edgewise before she was on her back on the sofa being eaten rambunctiously.

I don't know. Like I said, I should probably dissuade people from fucking in dark corners when I find them, just because what if someone else found them and it came out that I'd not performed my responsible adult duty? In places where I'm not the law in town (I may be very low on the hierarchy of the law at my job, but I'm still the law) I don't feel quite as responsible, but then I'm not responsible, usually.

In my younger days, had our ages been a little bit closer, I might have offered to join in. As it is, they got to get lucky twice in one day, I guess.

Flash Fiction Friday Cross-Post

Once again, over on the fiction side of things (and I promise to keep fiction there so no one is confused) I've participated in Flash Fiction Friday. Check it out and then hit Max's blog for other participants. I feel like I should have some sort of value-added content over here to justify cross-posting, but I can't think of anything. Any ideas? I don't want to just post writer's notes over here. Maybe I could try to recall some fun stories from my past which relate in some way to the topic of the week? I don't know. I'm open to suggestions as long as they aren't impossible to maintain.

Speaking of Anal

We were speaking of anal, right? Of course we were. It's me.

Anyway, I've been going through some old files and stuff and I've found some pictures from who knows when, and I figured why not share one with my faithful reading public? I'm pretty sure it's my brother and I, but beyond that I have no context. No fun story to share, just a little eye candy for you.

TMI Tuesday

From the TMI Tuesday blog:

1. What did you last savor and when?

The last thing I think I really savored was the sensation of putting a larger buttplug in after wearing a smaller one all day. Details here, but the shorter version is that I had gotten used to the feeling of wearing the small one and then to accommodate the larger one took a bit of effort on my part which is part of why I love anal. That slow spread sends me. I really enjoyed it after a long-ish day at work.

2. Athletic mind blowing sex or slow sexy romantic sex, what do you want right now?

Right now, because I'm not having any, I want athletic mind-blowing sex, hard, from behind. Maybe multiple partners. But if I got that, I'd switch over to wanting romance. I've been getting plenty of that lately though. Maybe I should talk to Sveta about getting a bit rougher.

3. You are being interviewed and asked to comment on sex-work. What do you have to add to the discussion?

Not much. Sex work is work, but that's hardly something I'd be adding to the discussion. I would stand in solidarity with my sibling sex-workers, but as far as a new perspective, I don't really have one. I'm not very good at sex work and thus I can't really speak from personal experience.

4. Should sex-work be decriminalized?

It should be more than decriminalized. It should be encouraged. Okay, maybe that's what I have to add to the discourse: I think sex work is a noble calling which should be legal, safe, and protected by unions. I think it should be destigmatized and made a perfectly acceptable field to go into. Again, I'm bad at it, but I'm not good at rocket science either, and only one of those two professions is currently looked upon as quality work. But I think that so-called "low-skill" labor should be treated equally well. I'm pretty consistent in my attitudes toward labor.

5. Fill in the blank. Don’t _____ .

Don't be a jerk. Seriously, life is too short. I'm not saying you have to be a doormat or that you have to love everyone, but don't be a jerk.

Bonus: Are you bored with people who are successful and unhappy? Why?

Not really. I mean, sometimes I wish I had those problems, and sometimes people complaining about how fame is horrible really makes me want to slap them, but there's a difference between feeling like fame is horrible and being unhappily successful. Success shouldn't be measured by the metrics we use, but I'm assuming that "successful" here doesn't mean "happy," which is what I'd view as fairly successful. If you're not happy with your success, why are you doing it? That said, success is no antidote for mental illness or the crushing realization that success in a late-stage capitalism will only ever be measured by how productive a worker you are. So I feel sorry for people who aren't happy with their success, but I also get where they're coming from. I'm not bored with them. I'm bored with people who are happy and successful and think that the way they did it is the way everyone has to do it.

---

I know I always talk here about how you need to ask me sexy questions or I'll keep giving inane responses to TMI Tuesday questions, but really, you don't need to ask sexy questions. You can ask me anything. I won't promise I'll answer, but if you want to know utter mundane stuff, feel free to ask that sort of question too. I never know whether non-sexy stuff is super boring for the reader or not. You can let me know what kind of things you like to read, too.

I don't know. Blogs used to be a community (Web 2.0 anyone?) with comments and replies and such, and Facebook killed that, but you sure as shit can't post the kind of stuff I post on Facebook, so why be bound by their rules for what constitutes good content? I know some people like TMI and some don't. I just need excuses to write things.

Anyway, ask away. lexinaughtygirly[AT]gmail.com, or comment on a post, any post.

Plugged In At Work

The other day, I decided that my life wasn't exciting enough, so I pulled out a medium buttplug, popped it in, and went to work with it in me. I was not expecting, nor did I receive, any fun and games at work, so it was just a constant reminder of how much fun inserting things into my anus really is. I thought you'd like to see a visual representation of what it was like, so I had Sveta take a picture of me wearing panties over a plug, just so you'd have that in mind as you were thinking of me going to work like that. Because I've posted over a thousand posts, and we're still celebrating, plus I've realized that I'm coming up on 15 years on Blogger (God I'm old), I'm going to share that picture with you.

Unfortunately, I hate to break it to you but this is not in fact the outfit, nor is it the plug, with which I went to work. The plug was one of those silly jewel ones, and the outfit was much more black because I don't typically wear panties like this to work. But when I got home I'd gotten so used to the smaller plug I wore all day that I really wanted some time with his bigger brother, and then I thought to myself, "Self, why not take a picture for the nice people who read my blog?" So I did, just not of what I'd really intended to take a picture of. Sometimes things work out like that.

Sveta suggested that I describe, for those of you who may not have had the pleasure, the sensation of insertion, and while they should have sent a poet (how I'd fit a poet up my ass I don't know), I'll give it the old college try.

First off, lube is essential. Even I, an old hand at this sort of thing, require some sort of lube. Getting a cock up my ass dry is doable sometimes, but silicone? Lube is a must.

The first thing I feel is the tip of the plug pressing against the ring of muscles surrounding the main attraction. If there's enough lube, that's shortly followed by the flare of the plug spreading that ring. Being spread is, at least for me, easy enough, at least in the toys I use. It's a nice feeling, like a massage of the ring. I think the main reason I don't like rimjobs as much is because I need a deep tissue massage that a tongue just can't get me, but your mileage almost certainly will vary.

Then, if I'm using the right size, the spreading becomes almost too much. What that is varies, but I like to strike a balance between too big and painful and too small to feel. The spread is where it's at, as far as feeling the insertion goes. Depth doesn't get me as much as width to start with. Then, just as I'm hitting the point where I'm wondering if maybe I'm going to spread too much for comfort, pop, the ring slides over the bottom of the flare and the plug seats itself inside me.

And that's when the depth starts to matter. I'm not a depth queen by any stretch. I don't want a baseball bat shoved up there. But I like to feel just a little bit spread, full, and to feel the tip of the toy pressing into me deeper. I'm not sure exactly how to describe that. It's like being pleasurably constipated, which doesn't sound like fun but trust me it really is.

I can sit with a plug up my ass without much difficulty, if it's the right size. I'm not especially gifted in the badonk area, but I have enough meat to keep things from pushing deeper if I don't want them to. And unlike, say, a vibe in my pussy, a buttplug isn't threatening to get me off at any moment, at least the ones I typically wear out and about. It's just a nice pressure when I sit on it, and if I tense up a little I can feel it resist inside me.

Anyway, I didn't cum once at work, which I think was half restraint on my part and half that I actually had to pay attention to things for once.

Do you have any fun anal toys? Any anal toy questions? Hell, any anal questions at all? Drop me a line and tell me about them, or ask them, or whatever.

Oh, and kids, remember to buy toys that are dishwasher safe because there's nothing sadder than having to hand-wash your toys.

Flash Fiction Friday Crosspost

Once again, it's time for Flash Fiction Friday over at my fiction blog Eris and Psycho. Hope you enjoy!

You can play along, or read other takes on the same picture and restrictions, over at Max's blog.

On the Question of Hair

Hedone (who runs the TMI Tuesday Blog) asks, "Do you prefer your sex partner shave clean their genitals or have some hair down there?"

I prefer vulvas to be shaved. That wins out by a nose (hehe) over having a soul patch over the items in question, simply because I'm a perv. But picking pubes out of my teeth just isn't for me. I know some people prefer the full muff, and I support and love them, but if you're going to make Lexi happy, you'll have groomed your lips cleanly so I can enjoy them without distractions.

In penises, since I'm not terribly into sucking balls, I'm more cosmopolitan. I don't care for stubble, so hopefully if you're planning on shaving the twig and berries, you'll do it shortly before coming to visit. But if ball-sucking is on the menu, again, clean-shaven wins out just because I don't like hair in my mouth.

If it's just ornamental and I'm not going to be putting my tongue on it, a bush at the base of the tree is fine. If I had to speculate, I'd say that most of my gentleman callers (I've never had anyone but a gentleman sporting a penis, not that I'm against the idea) have been unshaven. I don't really mind that. Sometimes the tickle of pubes against my labia or clit can be a real turn-on.

But really, I'm only avidly opposed to a bush when it hasn't been washed recently. I'm willing to go with a lot of things if they're clean. A muff that I'm not diving can feel very interesting (in a good way) when we're tribbing, for example.

Lastly, I can't judge too harshly because sometimes my grooming gets lax and I have a muff myself. I get it. It's a pain in the ass (sometimes literally) to deal with pubic hair sometimes. So I'm not turning down an invitation just because there's a little grass on the field. Preferences and prohibitions are two different things.

Thanks Hedone for asking a fun question! Be like Hedone. Ask via email (lexinaughtygirly[AT]gmail.com) or comment (I get emails whenever anyone comments, so it can be from a post a decade ago and I'll still see it).

TMI Tuesday

From the TMI Tuesday blog.

1. One of my ideas is to someday create _____ .

A programming language to teach kids to program. I've been thinking about it since college. I doubt it'll ever actually happen, but I think about it.

2. Do you travel lightly?

I travel light, in as much as I don't pack a lot of cruft to travel. But I don't travel lightly, in as much as I don't just jaunt to a destination on the spur of the moment. I'm not much for travel, honestly.

3. How would you create the best dressed baked potato?

First off, it's got to be salted on the outside. Nice big crystals of salt. Plus I want the skin to be crispy, so I'd probably have to oil the skin too. Then when it's perfectly done, break it open and scoop out a fair portion of the fluffy inside, mix with butter, chives, and sour cream. Put it all back in the potato, then top with good melting cheese, a mild cheddar or a gruyere, maybe a smoked gouda. Put back into the oven until the cheese is browned. Top with more sour cream, chunks of crispy bacon, and serve.

4. The best thing you tasted over the weekend was _____ .

I made a pretty mean Hyderabadi green chicken curry on Sunday. What, you were expecting me to say pussy?

5. What do you wish you had payed attention to?

Lots of things, and at the same time I didn't pay attention to them because they were boring and I didn't feel like it, so if I had paid attention to them I would have had to suffer through them. I don't know. I get bored easily. It's my brain and I curate what goes into it. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

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For the love of all that is holy, wear your masks and get vaccinated and send me questions so I don't have to keep posting inane answers to non-sexy questions, either because the pandemic calms down to the point where I feel safe getting some strange so I can talk about it, or because I have sexy questions to answer.

Flash Fiction Friday Crosspost

For a while, at least, I'm going to post a link to my FFF offering on the main blog, just so no one misses it. Not that there are that many people to miss it. Ah well.

Check out the others at Max's blog (sorry Max, I got the link wrong but it should be fixed now).

TMI Tuesday

You can't stop me from answering these questions unless you want to try in some sexy way that I haven't anticipated and it turns from fighting into fucking and all of the sudden we're both like, "Whoa, what just happened?" And then I'll probably still answer these questions. Sorry.

From the TMI Tuesday Blog:

Intimacy

1. How do you survive an intimacy famine?

I've been lucky in that even in my most drought-parched times, intimacy-wise, I've still had some fallbacks. So I guess that's the first thing: have fallbacks. If you're one of those unfortunate people who believes you can only be intimate with one person, I'm sorry. My advice for that is to find appropriate substitutes. Maybe you are monogamous, but you can still share safe, friend-based intimacy of a non-sexual nature. But my resiliency in the face of famine has definitely been due to stocking up fallbacks for lean times. Sometimes they aren't enough. Sometimes you want intimacy and can't get it, or a certain kind of intimacy and it isn't available to you. In which case, I don't think I have a technique other than to grit my teeth and bear it until things change.

2. The loss of which one of these would most affect your mental health or outlook on life?
a. Loss of physical intimacy
b. Loss of emotional intimacy

This is a tough one. I would say emotional intimacy, but physical intimacy is so important to me. I'm not sure I can separate the two. I know that's not for everyone, and it's not the case that I must be physically intimate with everyone with whom I'm emotionally intimate or vice versa, but there's a lot of crossover. Still, I went through a period where my physical intimacy was at least highly curtailed and emotional intimacy got me through, so I'll still say emotional intimacy, though it's a close race.

3. Gives us a tip on how to get more intimacy in our day-to-day lives.

Communication and openness. And I'm definitely the pot calling the kettle black here, because I'm not great at it. Good at certain aspects of it, but not being open with people, and that's where true intimacy lies. I still have to stop myself from hiding things from Sveta even though we're married and she knows everything about me, just by force of habit. But still, if you're open with others and communicate your desires, intimacy results, unless your desires aren't to be intimate. But even then, I'd argue there's a certain intimacy in both parties in a relationship (or all parties in a multi-party relationship) being on the same page, even if that page is that there's no relationship to be had. I don't know. Something like that.

4. Do you think modern technology helps or hinders intimacy?

It changes it. I can be as "close" to people virtually as if they were in the same room as I am, but by the same token I can be in the same room with someone and be as far away from them as if we were texting from different planets. I don't think technology is a good or evil force in the search for intimacy. It simply exists.

5. Would you utilize the services of a professional cuddler?

Probably not, because I have plenty of outlets for my cuddling needs. But even if I didn't, I'm not sure I would. Cuddling isn't a big deal for me. Not that I don't want to cuddle, but it's not something I need in the way some people do. I also have some sensory issues related to my mental health which make certain kinds of cuddling too much, but I'd expect a professional to know how to deal with that.

Flash Fiction Friday Is Back

Well, it's back because Max is back. He's a good egg, is Max, and he's inviting us all to join him in flashing some fiction this Friday. Head over to his blog (Thoughts From a Mystic Satyr) for this week's prompt picture and rules. Do it. Now. You've got nothing to lose and everything to gain. Also, Max is a good writer so you should check out the rest of his blog too. I'm pimping it.

My offering will be posted on Friday to the blog you probably forgot I had, Eris and Psycho, where I hope to do more fiction stuff, maybe with some help from my delightful and imaginative wife and friends.

Porn Questions

From reader T, in the context of porn:

What are you into? Do you track the actors or amateur? Go-to scenes?

What I'm into changes all the time, really. I like cute girls, usually on the skinnier side, with smaller breasts than a lot of porn stars seem to have, so I tend to skew toward "amateur" rather than MILF stuff, but sometimes I like a good MILF on young man video. Fetish-wise, I like preggo porn, I like tiny girls on big dicks, and of course I enjoy the fake incest that you typically get from modern porn. I even go in for vintage porn, though I confess I prefer my actresses shaved, or at least neat in the pussy area, rather than the full '70s muff.

I tend to watch less lesbian porn, but if I'm feeling like that, I like FFM threesomes. I like MMF threesomes too, though I don't think they truly count unless there's some DP involved. I prefer true amateur stuff if I can get it, but it's hard to find these days, for some good and some bad reasons.

One thing I really enjoy, as a niche fetish, is sex which is treated like it's totally normal. Like, a video where the family is having dinner and dad gets a hardon looking at little sis, so he bends her over the table and fucks her while everyone keeps eating dinner. Good stuff of that niche is hard to find, so feel free to drop me recommendations.

I'm also into swingers and groups. I really like groups where partners get swapped during the course of it. Too many orgies are just a bunch of couples having sex in a house together. That's fine, but what I really like is when there are several couples and they swap partners.

I love, love, love creampies and impregnation. My dream video is probably one where dad fucks daughter, mom fucks son, at the dinner table, they each get creamed, then they swap and get creamed again.

I don't watch many videos with only one girl. I like pictures of that sometimes, but not video. And I like penetration of all kinds.

I also sometimes like tender, well-filmed porn even though it's not real at all. Sometimes a gal wants to see romance-movie fucking. Sometimes she wants to see the dirty stuff.

As far as tracking actors, if I find an actor I like I might go looking for more videos of them. If I find an "amateur" I like, I'll click on their page on PornHub or whatever to see if they've done other videos. But I frequently forget. I'm much more of a browser.

I'm not sure whether I have go-to scenes as such. I don't tend to watch the same videos more than once; they just don't work for me after I've seen them. I like to see the first penetration in a video, so if that counts as a scene, that's one I want.

Lastly, I do like things other than videos as foreplay. Videos I use to get off to because they can be played without any intervention by me, meaning I can watch and rub and not have to worry about turning pages. But I would like to recommend Lovin' Sis as a webcomic which is both well-done and also incredibly sexy. There are three parts; that's the first one. Give it a chance. It might change your mind about consensual incest, if I haven't been able to do so.

Thanks T for the questions. You too could get a shout-out at the end of a post by asking me questions so I don't have to resort to canned ones. Be like T.

Planes, Trains, and Automobiles

A question from an anonymous fan who knows who they are:

When's the last (or most memorable) time you had sex in a car, train, plane, boat? Or any other transportation mode I'm missing.

I've never had sex on a plane, largely because I've never flown on a plane. Plus, I hear the Mile High Club is not all it's cracked up to be. But sorry to disappoint any die-hard fetishists out there. I don't believe in Bernouli's Principle so I make it my business not to occupy vehicles where my lack of belief will shatter the illusion that allows you denialists to enjoy powered flight. If you've ever seen the Monty Python sketch where El Mystico is putting up blocks of flats by hypnosis, that's how I feel about planes.

I'm sure I've told some car sex stories in the past. Pretty sure I also mentioned some bus hanky panky as well. So I won't tell those stories again, memorable though they may have been. A memorable story about car sex I haven't already told is called for.

On the day before my wedding I went to the train station to pick up my old roomie from college, Gwen. She was traveling from far enough away that a train made more sense for her, but I didn't want her to have to get a cab from the nearest stop which is surprisingly far from where our wedding venue was, so I said sure, I'll pick you up.

I was a little stressed out. Not going to lie. Nerves and so forth, plus we were basically planning a giant party for a bunch of people, many of whom wouldn't know each other, and then after were planning several smaller after-parties. I'm not a party planner.

I picked up Gwen and she took one look at me and said, "You're shitting a brick. I can tell." Never one to sugar-coat things, is Gwen.

I admitted that yes, I was shitting a series of bricks.

"I know what will make you feel better."

I had no idea what she was going to suggest, but I was pretty sure I would have to say no, because the tables still had to be picked up and set up plus a lot of decorating, plus etc. etc. But Gwen is a bad influence on me, or maybe she's a good influence but she influences me.

"What?"

"You need to get off. I know that look. When's the last time you had any?"

I admitted that it had been probably a day or so. We'd just been too tired and stressed to find the time, which should tell you something.

"Find somewhere quiet to park and I'll get you off real quick."

And though I had things to do and people to see and places to go, I grinned and found someplace where it wouldn't be immediately obvious to anyone walking by what was going on, and then pulled down my pants and panties and let Gwen fingerbang me hard. Like, I haven't been fingered like that in a car since I was in high school hard, and the last time it wasn't done with any skill. She shushed my protests and got her lips around my left nipple and her fingers just kept slamming up into my clit from the inside, and I came, and then came again. And then she licked her fingers, and we drove off, chatting like nothing had happened.

It did help the stress a little, and it was only when I was about to get out of the car to see her to the door of her hotel room that I realized I'd been driving around bare-ass the whole time. That made us both chuckle.

So that's a recent car story. Now for water transport.

I went to a day camp when I was younger, out in the woods where kids couldn't do any harm, with a swimming pool and a local creek for canoes and kayaks. I was really good at swimming and boating when I was younger, actually. I've forgotten a lot of it now, plus I'm not young anymore so my muscles don't work like they used to, but at that point I could have been a lifeguard had I felt like doing it. I would go to this camp for a few weeks every summer, just to get me out of the house.

The counselors at the camp were, for the most part, older, but there were a few who were barely older than the oldest campers, and one year, I think it was the last year I was young enough to go, there was this guy I'd known when he was a camper. We'd flirted a little, but I think he was too insecure to have gone for anything much.

Because I was good in the water I was allowed to do all kinds of things like take the rowboat out on the creek without supervision. So I made it my mission to find someone (a guy, likely, because at this point I was still convinced I was straight and just occasionally fooled around with girls) to go with me on a rowboat trip around the bend to where no one could see us and fool around.

I tried, I really did, but it was getting late in the summer and I had had no takers. All the boys wanted to do their own thing in their own boats. Macho pride, etc. And cute counselor saw me looking glum and asked me what was up, to which I replied, without really thinking, that I was annoyed that no one wanted to take a boat trip with me."I'll go with you," he said.

Bullseye.

He wasn't a counselor in charge of boating so he knew less about the activity than I did, which was just as well. I was showing off a little, and he was being responsive, and when I looked around and there was no one in sight and said, "Do you want to kiss?" or something to that effect, shockingly, he said yes. So I shipped oars and we floated downstream slowly and made out. He wasn't moving quickly enough for my taste (which in those days was definitely directed toward action rather than foreplay) so I had to guide his hands to my tits, but once he knew that I was totally going to put out, he was ready to go.

We had to be gentle so we didn't capsize the boat, and we were both a bit nervous about being spotted, but once I had his cock out and was blowing him, he was mine, hook, line, and sinker. When I lay back without finishing him in my mouth, his face did a gorgeous one eighty from disappointed to enthralled. I pulled down my shorts and panties (skirts were definitely not done at this camp) and guided him into me. He didn't last that long, but he was hard inside me and after he pulled back and jizzed onto my belly, I cleaned myself up and then fingered myself until I came.

He was getting hard again after watching that display, but we'd reached the part of the creek where it was likely we'd hit rapids, so bare-ass (which seems to be the theme for this post) I rowed us to the shore, and we hopped out and fucked up against a tree, and this time I got what little load there was inside me and managed to cum on his cock too. Not in a boat that time but part of the story.

And then I never saw him again. I'm not joking; I think it was close to the last day of my camp experience that summer, and if it wasn't my last summer there, he didn't come back as counselor the next summer. I don't recall. Details get fuzzy.

I can't think of any other modes of transportation to cover. If you can, drop me a line or comment or whatever. If you can't but you can think of a question to ask, ditto.

TMI Tuesday

Do you consider your sex to be “conventional”? Why or why not?

I mean, no? I have too much of it, for one thing, with too many people, and they're many of them of  incorrect genders, and I incorporate acts which aren't typical. But what is convention? Is it what we all have agreed to think it is, or is it what actually goes on in the bedrooms of the world? I think the average person is a bit more freaky in the bedroom than they're willing to admit, and their fantasy lives are considerably more so. But I still don't think I'd fall into the realm of the average. I'm just too big of a slut for that.

How do you describe your gender identity?

I am reasonably cisgendered, so I'd say I'm a cis woman, though I don't conform to every standard of womanhood set by the ruling council of women. I don't feel like my gender presentation is out of step with my feelings, and I don't suffer dysphoria about it, so I'm cis, a woman, mildly gender-non-conforming.

How do you describe your sexual orientation?

I grew up during a time when "bisexual" covered the bases, and I've always felt vaguely bisexual, back before I had any real conception of genders beyond the binary. That said, it wasn't until fairly recently that I kind of admitted to myself that yes, I was in fact bisexual and not just "straight but fools around with girls because girls are fun to fool around with." It might have been getting married to a girl that did it. I don't know.

I would probably still say I'm bisexual, even with the baggage that implies, but my sexuality doesn't really have much to do with the gender binary, so I suppose in many people's minds I'm pansexual. I would happily have sex with a man with a vagina or a woman with a penis, or a non-binary person with any set of equipment, or none, if the case may be. But I still think of myself as bi. It's just how I was raised. Thinking of myself as queer is relatively new to me, as I said. I never felt like I belonged at Pride, for instance, but now I'm coming to realize, with the help of some friends, that I have a place in the rainbow, which is nice.

Is understanding the causes and effects, and the formation of gender stereotypes important?

Good lord yes. I mean, we'd all be happier if there were no restrictions on gender expression, so knowing what restrictions there are is useful if for no other reason than to understand how to subvert those restrictions if you so desire. That's where I'd put it; no restrictions means that you're free to express your gender in any way you like, including stereotypically. Too many people believe that feminism, for instance, means that all feminists want to be a certain way which isn't "girly," and that's just not true. Most of my gender expression that isn't typical is not a reaction to the patriarchy or whatever, it's just how I am. Similarly, being a sex kitten, when I am, is fiercely feminist for me because it's my choice.

So understanding where this all comes from helps one make informed choices. And those choices can be to be a sex kitten sometimes, be extremely submissive to men in the bedroom sometimes, be butch as hell with my wife sometimes, and all things in between. People are terrified that if you have a choice you won't choose to be a certain way, and that says less about you and more about the options those people are giving you.

What are your thoughts on this statement: “I’m in a committed relationship, and it feels like asking for consent every time we have sex is overkill—is that wrong?”

So obviously I believe that consent is key, even in a long-term committed relationship. That means that consent can be withdrawn at any time, for any reason. No amount of committed partnership excuses rape.

That said, I think in plenty of relationships, consent gets to the point where it's mostly implied. Removal of consent can still happen but because of the familiarity of the people in the relationship, consent doesn't need to be negotiated in the same way as it would otherwise. That's just natural. The same thing is true about a lot of things in a relationship.

That said, I don't think people really understand asking for consent. They make it seem like it's some sort of contract that everyone involved has to sign, when in fact it's more like, "You wanna fuck?" "Ok." "Kick ass! Let's go fuck!" That's consent right there. And I can't stress enough how sexy enthusiastic consent is. "You wanna go upstairs?" "Fuck do I! I want you to take me every which way to Sunday!" That's enthusiastic consent, and it's sexy as hell.

Consent is also a two-way street. You shouldn't have to ask every time because it should be more of a process whereby you and your partner(s) all consent to each other. Again, it's not like a fucking legal contract, and the people who want to make it like that are just looking for excuses to rape people and get away with it. Just be consenting, with a partner or partners, and it's fine. Guys, you love it when she's moaning, "Yes! Yes! Yes!" That's consent right there. That's consent to continue and it's sexy as hell. I'm singling guys out, but that goes for anyone. "Fuck me! Fuck me!" is both a very sexy thing to hear moaned and consent.

So I guess my thoughts are that people both make too big a deal about asking for consent and don't take it seriously enough. Such is the way of many things in life.