Being Fresh

Bob has a question:

"Here's a question for you: Have you ever slapped a guy? Like, for being 'fresh' or whatever?"

Good question.

I try not to be violent, as a rule.  When I was younger, I was always larger than my peer group, and definitely larger than kids younger than me (what can I say? I've always been tall), and I got into trouble a few times "not knowing my own strength" and so forth.  So I try not to get violent simply because it usually winds up blowing up in my face.

That said, leaving aside times when I've been mostly kidding (Mike has been slapped because he was being a jerk, but I pulled those punches), I can only think of a few times when I've even been tempted to slap someone.  Shockingly, despite the fairer sex's reputation for bitchy catfights, I don't think I've ever slapped another girl.  That's not to say I've never hurt another girl, just that it wasn't a slap.

With guys... I guess "fresh" has never been an issue for me.  Or rather, that my level of "freshness" is different and if you cross that line, you're getting more than a slap.

Hey, I don't usually do this, but this next paragraph is about attempted sexual assault, so... unsexy, might be triggering, if you don't want to read it, skip it.

I kneed a guy in the balls once.  In my defense (not that I think my action needs defending, but I know it's a painful area) he was beyond fresh, and I genuinely feared for my safety.  It also didn't really work, in that he probably would have just gotten madder, but it did draw attention to the situation and brought things to a crashing halt.  Had we been in a more secluded spot, I would probably have been in trouble, and had the police not been called, he would probably have assaulted and/or raped me.  Fortunately for me, the situation resolved itself more pleasantly, which is to say that it was a giant pain in the ass and I wound up having to talk my way out of an assault charge myself because he claimed I was the aggressor, etc. etc. but I wasn't assaulted or raped and I didn't get charged with anything because a cop showed up who wasn't a total dick and believed me enough to realize that the guy was drunk and belligerent and I was not.  Didn't believe me that the guy was trying to rape me though.  Fun times.

But that's not really an answer.

The answer is that I've never slapped a guy for being "fresh."  At the point in my life where guys were being "fresh" rather than assaulting me (and really, there's no difference, just that we excuse a lot of bad behavior in certain groups) I either was okay with it or I pushed them away but didn't slap them.

I have, however, slapped guys for things other than "freshness."  They don't stand out in my memory particularly, but I can remember a few.  I remember I gave a guy head once but told him in no uncertain terms that he was to cum in my mouth and not make a mess, so of course he proceeded to pull back and cum all over me.  I stood up, gave him a look which should have terrified him, and he laughed and said something, I don't remember what, so I slapped him.  Not "fresh" exactly, but I suppose if I were a different person it would have been a different situation and he would have gotten slapped for something more minor.  He got pissed and stormed off, I had to endure the humiliation of people knowing what we had been doing because there was no way to clean up without walking past other people.  I didn't care overly; I'm less prone to sexual humiliation.  But I still cared, and it still made me embarrassed.

I also recall slapping a guy because he didn't ask whether he could just jam his cock up my ass.  He had no way of knowing that it was okay.  It was more fight-or-flight response than anything else, and he jammed and I whipped around and smacked him hard.  And then screamed at him to get his shit and get the fuck out, if I remember correctly.  I was supremely pissed because had he asked, anal was totally on the table, but you don't jam an unlubed cock up an unsuspecting ass, particularly if it's your first time with this person and you don't know whether she's even okay with the idea of anal.  It's possible that I had a reputation for being okay with it, but it still wasn't cool.  If he'd made moves in that direction without asking, maybe started working toward it like he was going to pull a fast one on me, most girls still would have slapped him even if I wouldn't have.  But he just got me naked, bent me over, and with no prep work tried to fuck my ass.  No sir.

I feel a little worse about that one because it was partially my state of mind at the time.  If he'd caught me on a good day, the reaction would have been a lot less.  I was just not interested in putting up with his shit.  Not really an excuse, but I don't feel too bad about it.

Other than that, I can't think of any slaps which were memorable.  I'm pretty sure I've slapped people in non-sexual situations too, not for any sexual license on their part but because I was pissed at them.  But maybe not.  Like I said, I try very hard not to get physically violent.