There's a Protocol of Which I Wasn't Aware

I finally found out how to really participate in TMI. I never really knew how people got the questions or the lists of participants. Put that down to mostly laziness on my part. But thanks to HEDONE for posting something before the fact so I knew, I now know, and even though this week I can't even answer two of the questions, and I have no real plans to make this a weekly thing unless I get really bored, I'm going to participate fully this week to show my support for the concept, now that I know how. Wow, what a preamble. You can go to the TMI blog to participate as well, if you like.

Oh, and by the way, you should go encourage HEDONE to take a picture of Mango Man peeking his head out. She'll know what you mean. She probably won't do it, but I'm starting a vigorous grassroots campaign.

1. Under what circumstances would you kiss a stranger?

If you mean how could I be enticed to kiss a total stranger, I can think of a few ways. I might kiss a stranger who was nice, although how would I know he or she was nice unless I met them, at which point, do they still count as a stranger for the purposes of this discussion? At parties in my misspent youth, I believe I may have kissed people I didn't know. I'm not tremendously touchy-feeling, oddly enough, so I wouldn't go up to a total stranger and give them a kiss unless Sheri or alcohol or both were involved, I don't imagine. I might kiss a stranger under the mistletoe, or on New Year's Eve or something, although maybe not. And it would probably be in response to a request to be kissed, rather than pro-actively.

2. Who was the last person you sent a sexy or romantic text message to? What did the text say?

I don't text, so I can't answer this one.

3. What was the last sexy or romantic text message that you received and what did it say?

Ditto.

4. What was the longest romantic relationship you've had (months, years)? And what was the shortest romantic relationship?

Monogamous? I couldn't make it last more than a few months, no matter how I tried. As far as having a romantic relationship non-monogamously, I've had plenty that have lasted years. Excluding certain relationships because they're slightly outside the bounds of romance, I have no problem being romantic with someone for years, just not necessarily only with them. My romances tend not to break up horribly (although there are definite exceptions) but rather to simply fade away because we become less close. I have some people I care deeply about that I rarely see, so I wouldn't call them romantic relationships any more, but when I see them, it's not like we're starting over. We just have a relationship that is rarely ignited.

I'm very strange in this department, and believe me, I've had my share of romantic relationships of a more traditionally temporal type, where I date someone for a while, then we break up because it isn't working out. I've even gone further than that, but I really don't like to talk about that. Anyway, the relationships that work out and last are the ones that are slightly odd, and they're the ones I cherish.

5. If there was a cunnilingus contest, would you enter? Would you “eat” or be eaten? If eating, would you bring along your choice of pussy to lick or use one of the clean delectable pussies provided?

As a contest, if there was a really good prize on offer... wait, how exactly would one judge this contest? If I can bring my own partner, that basically removes any ability to judge, because it'll be totally subjective. And if it's for the sake of observers, that's not good either because looking good and feeling good are two different things (case in point: porn).

At a cunt-eating festival with no particular judging, I'd want to do both, and I'd bring someone along just so she could enjoy the festival too, not because I'd want to do nothing but be with her. Several someones. I could probably start my own festival. Damn I wish I could get Sheri and Sveta in the same location for long enough to have a mini festival.

6. If we asked your partner/lover to describe you sexually in one word, what do you think that word would be?

Which partner? I can't really say; I hope the word would imply quality, at least. I'm not asking for "perfection" or "greatest" but "wonderful" wouldn't go amiss. "Naughty?"

How about some words which wouldn't be used. Bellicose. Crispy. Proper. Impecunious. Pejorative. Undue. Ignoble. Sassafras. Gerund. Diophantine. Klien-bottle-like. Okay, that last one stretched the point. Anyway, I really don't know; why don't you ask them this question?