We sat; she smoked while I wished she wouldn’t, a post-coital ritual that I couldn’t stand. “I suppose we’ll have to wake him up sometime,” she muttered, almost to herself. Her voice grated, rasping and signifying decay. I couldn’t stand myself either, for sitting there.
Her kisses had tasted like ashes. Surely no man was worth this, no fuck, no matter how intense, no matter how he made me scream, how the curl of his finger brought me close without question. And yet we sat at the kitchen table and waited for him to wake and want us again.
“What did we drink last night?” Gen asked groggily, cradling her head.
“You just can’t hold your liquor,” said Bonnie across the table, taking a long drag. “Here, have a bit of pep.”
Their fingers touched as the butt was exchanged, and the electricity was still there. “I can’t believe...” began Gen, maintaining the contact, savoring it.
“No, me neither,” Bonnie sighed. A pause, and then, “You were terrific.”
“Thanks,” Gen giggled, blushing, as she remembered. The curl of her lip caught Bonnie’s eye, and the two shared a private smile, cigarette forgotten, hands clasped.
You aren’t there. Sometimes I see you sitting across from me as I eat a lonely meal, a curl of smoke, a shadow, but you aren’t there. I have to tell myself this. You are gone.
Maybe you were never there at all. Maybe I’ve always been this way: alone, naked in the growing darkness, talking to myself. Maybe we never met, or you never existed for me to meet. I wanted to believe that I loved you, and maybe you loved me.
And now I have myself believing it. I can’t even say goodbye. You aren’t there.
First, let's get this out of the way:
That's Franz von Suppe's "Morning, Noon, and Night in Vienna" if you're not the type who plays videos or can't see the video or whatever. Doubtless some of you have heard it as part of Baton Bunny; Warner Brothers cartoons are a great source of classical education, aren't they? This song, and that cartoon, have shockingly little to do with anything. Just thought you should know.
This wasn't a cheerful picture. Not that I'm complaining, but the lack of cheeriness may, just may, have been reflected in my contributions this week. Or maybe it's my own lack of cheer.
I don't have a lot to say this week either, and I don't have a joke to close out with, so I'll just say that the rest of the gang are waiting over at Flash Fiction Friday headquarters and you should visit them too. Or if you are one of the gang, or would like to be, get over there and put your name in so I can read yours. It's so easy.
15 comments:
Not so bad for a girl who isn't cheerful!
The last one is powerful and unusual for you, but I like unusual. Hope things get better! :)
All three takes are interesting, but I like the first the most. I think it's the disgust you write into the character. Nice :-)
I caught the same somewhat despondent mood for the picture, but I forced myself into a more cheerful interpretation because I figured I'd written enough melancholy stuff for a while. I guess you have to follow your muse, eh?
Interestingly, though, I enjoyed both of the first two, but the emotional content of the third one makes it my favorite by far. Even if it is sad.
Happy FFF to you!
-- PB
Three very different takes, all nicely creative. I think the first one goes with the picture the best.
I liked "Morning, Noon, and Night in Vienna" even before I knew the Bugs version (which is *classic*!) Maybe not up to the high standard of "Rabbit of Seville", but classic nonetheless! :-)
Happy FFF!
I really like #3. Sad, stirring, unexpected.
The first two were good as well.
-H
I grew up in a house full of classical music and my mother's deep appreciation of the cartoons that brought it into the homes of millions of children every Saturday morning. I still ID classical pieces based on the cartoons they went with and recently bought a large collectino on DVD for my kids.
As for this not being a "cheery" pictures, I agree, and, as the one who sent it in, I love it. It was just rife with possibilities that I couldn't resist, and, besides, how much can you write about a happy pictures? I liked #3 the best if I was forced to pick, but no one is forcing me, so I will admit freely to liking them all but the "little bit of crazy" in #3 puts it out front.
@France: Sometimes grim works. Or maybe I'm just feeling wistful. Either way, I'm not hoping for depression just so I can write better ;)
@Topaz: I think that may be the first time I've ever had a compliment involving the word "disgust" but I'll take it ;)
@PB: I think the third one is a bit of a rumination on loss; is it better to live in a fantasy world even though you know it's not real, just so you can see someone again? Or is that more painful? I don't know myself; I've never been good at delusions of that sort.
@Max: The classic classic is What's Opera, Doc? All else pales in comparison.
@HEDONE: I thrive on unexpected ;)
@Advizor: I wasn't complaining about the lack of cheer, merely explaining about my lack of cheer in response. Sometimes a cheery picture is nice, and sometimes one likes one with more shadow. And as a possessor of more than a little bit of crazy, I figured I could share some ;)
Number One moves me the most. But I've always been a sucker for first person - and it has that 'noir' look and feel to it. I'm a huge fan of noir films.
Yeah. A good one for me, for this week as well. Been a dark one.
PS
@PS: it was a little film noir-ish, I guess. Hard-boiled, certainly. I can't pretend to be terribly good at noir; it's a style which requires a lot of practice, a lot of rigor, and maybe belonging to a time-period that no longer exists. It's like classic westerns; we don't make films like that any more because we can't. But I offer homage.
The third one was my favorite. I think we've all had those days when we wonder what in the hell happened.
@Word: Lord knows I have. Frequently. Actually, pretty much every morning, I look like this photo.
All three are absolutely fabulous and I loved them.
The second one was so realistic I was there. The third was powerful.
All so short and you said so much.
@Pocket: Thanks hun :)
Oh! Some nice background music to do some nice FFF reading. ;-) I especially like your use of the required phrase, in particular, "the curl of his finger". That's a nice visual for me. ;-)
@TemptingSweets: Curled fingers have a whole slew of different meanings in the context of sex. Is it beckoning or is it pleasure? Only her vibrator knows for sure ;)
Post a Comment