TMI Cheating

Now that I've answered these, I'm not sure why I did, but hey, it's Tuesday, which means it's time for TMI.

Her: I saw you flirting with her. Cheater!

Him: It’s not cheating if we don’t have intercourse.

1. You have been separated from your significant other for six months. An attractive, attentive neighbor has paid you flattering attention. It is obvious he/she wishes to take the relationship further. Do you:

1. Dismiss him/her, you’re in a committed relationship.
2. Continue to flirt, but go no further.
3. Fantasize about him/her, but take care of your sexual needs solo.
4. Let the affair become physical.

I would ask what "separated" means, since that could be broken up or in different locations, but in this case it doesn't matter. Either way, I would have made clear to my significant other that I am not and never will be monogamous, and things like this would happen. I would expect the same from my sig-o. Now, I wouldn't lie about it to him or her if we were still in a relationship. But I'm strange that way. Anyway, I don't have "affairs" in that sense.

2. A male co-worker whom you have heard is great in bed and very well endowed has been flirting with you a lot. He obviously wishes to start a relationship. Do you:

1. Make it clear to him you’re not interested.
2. Flirt with him but go no further.
3. Mentally undress him and wonder what he’d be like in bed.
4. Let the relationship become sexual.

I don't (or at least my policy is to not) fuck coworkers. So I'd probably do a bit of C and a bit of B but leading toward A.

Or I'd screw myself over and go for D. I'm only human.

3. Your significant other is impotent most of the time, showing little interest in you and little interest in being sexual. Do you:

1. Resign yourself to no sex.
2. Satisfy your needs with masturbation
3. Find someone who can satisfy you sexually but remain with your significant other
4. Leave him or her

Odd that this question would come up. Just for the record, impotent doesn't mean showing no interest. If my significant other stopped showing sexual interest in me, impotent or not, well, as I've said, I'm not a one-person gal, so I'd have options. I'm not resigning myself to no sex. But if my significant other felt vulnerable because of his/her condition, I might hold off on seeking out other people and try to live with masturbation, at least at first. It's all about communication; I wouldn't go behind my lover's back, but I would discuss what was going on, and try to find some way of working through it. Anyone I care enough for to become what one would term significant-other, I wouldn't just dump out of hand.

4. The last time you and your mate had sex, were you:

1. Concentrating mostly on him/her, and you didn’t even orgasm
2. Thinking about your pleasure and theirs.
3. Concentrating mainly on your own pleasure.
4. Used his/her body as a tool to reach your own orgasm.

Which mate? With me, it's usually B, simply because I'm pretty easy to please but I do like to be pleased, and I also am pleased when my partner is pleased. I don't want to sound selfless; I get off, thank you.

5. What kind of partner do you prefer while making love or having sex?

1. Tender, loving, slow and sweet
2. I don’t care, just do me; it’s been a while
3. Tough, take-charge, I like it a little rough
4. Any lovin’ is good lovin’

None of these options work because it depends. I'm not an "any port in a storm" kind of gal all the time, although if I get desperate enough, that's what it becomes. But I'm also not totally set on any of the other options. I like tender and loving, and I like a little rough, and depending on my mood and how my day has been I'd like either one, the other, or both.

Bonus: Do you mind if your significant other ogles/checks out another sexy person? What if they comment on that person, do you mind that?

No, because I do it too. Actually, that's some of the most fun I've had with boyfriends: girlwatching. Sveta and I do it, and I've done it with boys I've dated too. We can both ogle together, and we both comment. I've been in a few relationships where that wasn't the case, but these days, that's what I want anyway.

Bonus, Bonus: What are your thoughts on the TMI Tuesday image above and the caption beneath it?

Cheating is what you intend, not what you do. That's why I can be faithful to someone even as I'm having sex with someone else. I'm faithful in that I don't do things secretly and I don't expect differently from them than I do from myself. Not that I'm always faithful, but when I am, that's how it works. So yes, flirting can be cheating. Or it might not be. If you're in a relationship with someone who would think of flirting as cheating, and you know this, and you do it anyway, then it is. That doesn't mean you're wrong; if anything, if you're in a relationship where innocent things are cheating because your significant other thinks they are, then something is wrong. If your sig-o gets jealous when you talk to a member of the opposite sex, even innocently, then that might be cheating to your sig-o, but the problem isn't that you're cheating but that he or she thinks that it's cheating. Basically, if you're being unfaithful in some way, it's cheating. People view relationships as a contract, like there are loopholes you can exploit where you're able to do things which should be cheating but aren't. It shouldn't work that way. Relationships are about trust, not about rules. That's my simple, country-girl opinion anyway.