TMI Tuesday

Please send questions.  I get bored and fun stuff doesn't always happen on schedule.

From the vault:

1. I am in need of an intervention for my obsession with _____ .

Porn?  Probably porn.  I am a porn collector.  I like downloading pictures, sorting through them, cataloguing them, tagging them, categorizing them, etc.  I probably spend more time collecting porn than I do looking at it, and the stuff I've collected I rarely return to.  I did go through a period where I had no internet connection and I revisited some of my collection in the interim, but really it takes something more than a picture to get me off any more.  So I watch a fair amount of video too, but I don't download that.  I was collecting bookmarks for a while, but that's just not the same.

2. You are being auctioned off. What is your unique selling point?

I cook, in the kitchen and in the bedroom.  And also in the kitchen.  And in other rooms.  But I can make pretty good food, or so I've been told.  I'm my own worst critic when it comes to food prep, so I don't usually like the things I make as much as other people do, and if I'm cooking for myself I pull out precisely none of the stops, but I do enjoy cooking for others.

3. On a scale of 1-5 how many stars did your mom or dad give your current significant other or your favorite, longest lasting love? (1 is bad, 5 is great)

5.  Mom and Dad love Sveta.  They haven't cared for some of my other long-term relationships, but in many cases they turned out to be right, so I've learned to at least take their opinions into account, even if I don't let them be the final arbiter.

4. Most of the meals I eat are:
a. Cooked in a microwave
b. Cooked in the oven/stove
c. Made by someone else

I think I average more meals prepared on a stove than either of the other options, but as I said, if I'm cooking for just me, I am frugal to the point of ridiculousness and lazy to the point of stupor.  "Meals" is perhaps a charitable term for what I make for myself, although I'm sure many other people would be in awe that I bother to cook anything rather than just heating up a microwave meal.

The microwave gets a bad rap, in my humble.  It's a tool in the kitchen just like everything else, and you can make crap on the stovetop just as easily as in the microwave, albeit perhaps with a bit more effort.  I think the ability to have a baked potato in minutes without heating the house up, for instance, is wonderful.

5. When work and life stress me out, nothing relieves the tension like _____ .

An orgasm.  Come on, it's me.  Is there really any other answer to this question that I would give?  That said, when orgasms elude me, as they often do these days, chocolate and comedy are good fallbacks.  Not as nice nor as relaxing, but fallbacks nonetheless.  And if all else fails, there are drugs.

Bonus: Write and answer your own bonus question.

No.  No I won't.  Someone else needs to write my questions.  I'm lazy.