Holiday Festivities

Hell, I'm only a month late. What's the world coming to?

So Christmas. Zoe had family entanglements for the actual holiday, which meant that, in a Christmas gift she didn't know she was getting us, Sveta and I got to go to my parents' house for Christmas. My brother was already there, which meant he'd gotten the formalities over with and could concentrate on pleasing Sveta, because she hadn't had a cock in ages. Not that my dad wasn't interested in pleasing Sveta too. But Sveta told him that he was to give his daughter a creampie or she would be very disappointed.

This was all arranged in advance, but when we got there Mike was fucking Mom. Because of course he was. He apologized but said that she'd needed one and Dad was saving it up for his girls. Mom was too busy cumming to apologize too, though she did afterward. We told them that was silly and that was that. As it was, Dad was sitting back and enjoying the view, so we got to help him enjoy it a little with some well-placed hands and lips.

Once Dad got hard enough to go, he cheated on me with Sveta for a while, just to warm up. Dad has the stamina of an ox, even now, and sometimes it's all we can do to get him to cum, so starting off in Sveta and then moving to me seemed like the best way to get Lexi her cream. Mike let me clean off his cock, so I got to taste Mom's pussy vicariously at least.

Then Sveta, having cum (cummed?) nicely thank you, hopped off and I bent over and let Dad have his way with my pussy while she sucked his cock a little. I was cumming when Dad thrust in the first time, which made me gasp and made my orgasm skip a beat, a sensation I always enjoy even if it is hard to achieve. Then he railed me for what felt like half an hour and may have been. I came a bunch of times. He finally flipped me over so we could be face to face while he pumped his cream into me. Delightful.

When I regained situational awareness Mike was eating out Sveta while Mom had decamped to the kitchen to get dinner prepped. I joined her, we chatted, Dad joined us, we all chatted, then dinner was ready and Sveta and Mike had reached a decent stopping point, so we all ate dinner. Then gifts. Nothing particularly of interest to the readers of this blog.

Then we had to go home so Mike sexed his big sister up good and proper, quickly and forcefully in my ass and then into my pussy to finish, which I let him do because he's the baby and he'd bitch and moan if I made him stop to clean off. I don't usually do ass-to-pussy as a rule but I break that rule all the time. Do as I say, kids, not as I do.

We went home and hosed off so when Zoe returned we wouldn't smell like a whorehouse after shore leave. Sveta basically showered and immediately passed out. I prowled around for a while and then did the same.

But wait, there's more. Part II will involve New Years Eve. But I so rarely post anymore that I'm breaking it up a little so you've got something to look forward to.

Oh, P.S. Sheri and Mari both called, we talked, everything is fine with them, they just couldn't get away for a visit this year.

Father's Day

For Father's Day this year Zoe went to celebrate with her dad and though Sveta really would have preferred to celebrate with my family, she went to her dad because family obligations are annoying but sometimes necessary. Which meant I was all alone in the house.

Only kidding. It meant I got to see my parents in a context where we didn't have to pretend for Zoe's sake. Plus, and this is a big plus, Mike came to visit too, similarly unencumbered by plus-ones who might not have known what was up. I haven't seen Mike in that context in forever. Probably not since the wedding, and that didn't really count either.

Of course Mom got first crack at Mike, but that was okay because Dad wanted first crack at me. It had been way, way too long for both of us. He was hard as a rock the second I walked through the door, said, "Your mother and Mike are upstairs, what say we stay down here for a bit?"

"Okay Daddy." And I slipped effortlessly back into little girl mode even though I'm hardly a little girl anymore. It's okay. I'm Daddy's little girl and that's all that matters.

We wanted to be face to face at first because there was a lot of kissing that needed to be done. In fact, he didn't immediately penetrate me, just held me in his arms and kissed me, his cock jutting between my legs. Back in the day when I was younger, I would have given him a Father's Day blowjob to really work him up, but we were both too frantic for that, and anyway he was as worked up as he was going to get and I had drenched my panties on the ride over, so we were plenty ready. Plus there's nothing that says that a Father's Day blowjob can't be administered as a change of pace during sex as opposed to before. Plus his cock tastes good with my pussy juice on it.

He hitched my hips up a little and slid into me, and I came. God I was ready for it. He thrust slowly in and out while I spasmed, his hand on the small of my back, guiding me onto him. It feels like comfort food but sex, if that makes any sense. While I'm with Dad, I feel safe from all the bullshit.

I came down after a moment and we talked a little while he gently but firmly kept guiding my hips around his, his shaft stroking every inch of my insides. I don't really remember what we talked about, but it wasn't that I was blissed out, just that it wasn't anything important.

"Can you ride me a little, girly? I'm not as young as I used to be."

I didn't say anything but that made me a little sad, because it's true. He's not. But I'm going to enjoy every minute of him I get. We adjusted until I was sitting in his lap, my legs between his, letting my ass press back against him with some rocking and some rotation. His hands were on my tits and my belly, holding me close, and we kept talking about random stuff until he got a little too enthusiastic and shifted his grip to my hips again, pulling me down and pressing up, not fast but hard, going as deep inside me as he can, until I came again, longer this time, my fingers on my clit.

At some point after that Mike and Mom came down and I hopped off Dad to go give my brother a big wet kiss. He returned it and we laughed. "Don't let me stop you from giving Dad his present," Mike said, giving me a playful slap on the behind.

"Actually, I got Dad something that isn't as boring as fucking his daughter yet again," I said, because I did. Just a little something. Mom went out to the kitchen to get dinner ready, and I said, "Of course, Daddy gets whatever he wants today."

"Well I'd like a little head to warm me up," he said. "Mike, why don't you get behind your sister and do whatever you're gonna do in her ass so I don't have to deal with sloppy seconds in that tight little pussy."

No sooner said than done. I had Dad's monster cock down my throat while Mike, after a moment of fucking my pussy to get some juice going, pressed into my asshole. Dad doesn't mind when I'm throating him and someone's fucking me from behind; he says it does fun things to my throat.

Eventually though, Mike pulled out, slapped my butt a little harder than necessary, and said, "Go on, let the old man finish in you. If he remembers how." I have no idea why Mike was giving my father a hard time about his age. I guess they were just playing. Normally that kind of joke is reserved for birthdays.

I flipped around, still on my hands and knees, and Dad slipped easily into my wet cunt, his hands gripping my ass cheeks, spreading me a little. He started fucking me hard. I know it's tough for him to finish these days, so I don't mind a little extra force if it gets him where he needs to be. Mike went to clean his cock off, I guess. I knew he'd be back.

I'm pretty sure I came somewhere in there, but I was enjoying the sensations enough that it barely mattered if I did. Dad finally pressed as deep as he could into me and I felt his orgasm fill me. That's one thing about Dad; he may only have one cum in him but it's always a nice big one. I had cream dripping out of me by the time he pulled out and let me clean him off.

"Happy Father's Day," I said, grinning.

"God I missed that," he said, sighing contentedly.

We ate dinner, then Mike and I went down to the basement to fuck properly, since we hadn't gotten a chance in forever. He enjoyed my throat as much as his father, then he got behind me again. I confess that I wish we'd been able to do it missionary first, but I knew he wanted anal and I wanted that too. He was wet with saliva, my ass is open for business when I get aroused, so he had no trouble getting back between my cheeks and going so deep his balls slapped my labia. I diddled myself as he fucked my ass hard, because we were racing to see whether he'd finish before I could get off. Why not? Sometimes it's fun to be kids again.

I won handily. I think he might have let me beat him, because he enjoyed feeling my orgasm on his cock. Then he fucked away for another minute or so and then grunted, "Oh fuck sis, I'm going to cum so hard!"

"Don't talk about it, just do it," I giggled.

He pressed home and fired his proton torpedo into my thermal exhaust port, and we collapsed, sweaty and satisfied.

We went back upstairs, chatted with the folks for a while, then both of us had to leave soon but we both wanted another go. So we kept chatting while I duplicated the position I'd been in with Dad, only with Mike's lap my target. He's not as big as Dad. Sorry Mike, you're just not. But he's plenty big enough. And he's my brother and I love him. We were fucking like that when Mari called to wish Dad happy Father's Day, so we all got to talk to her, though we didn't let on what we were doing.

Finally Mike said, "I'm close but I've got to go harder to finish, okay?" So we adjusted our positions until he was behind me, spooning me, and he thrust hard and fast into me, his hand and mine on my clit, until I came, which just about drove him over the edge. Then I put my clothes back on without really cleaning up and drove home and was sad because who knows when I'll get to see Mike again, or Dad really?

Sveta was out late but Zoe was home when I came home, and she said, "Damn, all I could think about all afternoon with my folks was you."

And me with my pussy creamy. Yeah, that wouldn't do at all. "I'm all sweaty," I said. "My parents keep the temperature too high. Let me take a quick shower and..."

"I'll join you!"

Fuck. "Okay." Because obviously I hadn't just been fucked to within an inch of my life and was totally ready for some hot girl on girl action.

I managed not to drip cum or reveal the state of my panties. We rinsed each other down, me concentrating on my pussy a bit more than was probably necessary, and then Zoe got on her knees and was eating me out. I had to explain that there was nothing wrong with her technique, I was just a little tired, and yes, I was enjoying myself, and yes, I was going to cum. She's so used to me being on a hair trigger.

We finally got out of the shower, managed to dry off a little, then adjourned to the bedroom where I could distract her with my own ministrations. She came like a freight train, which put thoughts of my orgasm out of the picture for a bit. Then she went back to my pussy, which had recovered sufficiently by then that I was able to reward her efforts with a small but presentable O shortly thereafter.

It never rains but it pours. It's okay. I was a bit worn out the next day, but I had no trouble walking or anything like that.

Anyway, a belated Father's Day gift from me to you.

How Are My Parents Doing?

An anonymous reader, via comment, asks, "[W]e haven't heard about your relations with your dad in a while. Is he ok? Any updates on your family would be , ahem, "stimulating" for this reader"

The main reason why I haven't talked about my father, or for that matter my mother, much since I've started back up with blogging is that there hasn't been much to tell. When Omicron hit the area, they kind of went back into lockdown because they're both highly comorbid. So I've seen them from a distance for the past few months. Basically, I've seen everyone except Sveta and Zoe from a distance the past few months, really.

They're both fine, just getting older and so with the accompanying medical issues. Dad can still get it up hard as a rock and he still loves his girls, but these days he lasts forever and sometimes can't cum at all. If he does go off, that's generally the ballgame, as it were. He's explored medical aids for this, but with some of his other medical issues they're not recommended, and anyway he can give much better than he gets, so no one is complaining.

Mom is doing okay too. She says her sex drive has slowed down a little, but that doesn't mean she didn't enjoy her outing with Liam back when it was still safe for her to do so. I think she'd like another helping of a young man who's dying to please her, personally, but who can blame her?

Sorry that's not a terribly exciting answer, but believe me, as soon as it's safe to start doing so again. Sveta and I both need a heaping helping of Daddy's love, and we'll definitely report on it when it happens.

Anonymous readers are just as welcome to ask questions as anyone else, and I read all my comments, so be like our anonymous friend and ask away. Or tell me what you'd like to hear about, if you don't have specific questions. I can't get Nielsen to return my calls about polling my readers for what they'd like to read, so I have to rely on you to tell me.

Liam's Birthday Present

Liam had two birthdays back when no one was allowed to visit, and while Sveta and I gave him a bit of a go-around when we were finally able to, he deserved a bigger gift than just the same old same old. And the thing is... let me back up a little.

I've talked with the kid, right? I mean, sure, the constant monkey sex might seem like it would get in the way of that, but I've talked with him. I talked with him via telecommunicated means when we couldn't see each other in person, and while yes, I admit that I spoiled him a little and let him watch Sveta and I go at it a few times, we also talked. About normal teenager stuff, but also about the rather unique circumstances that he and I find ourselves in, having fucked a family member or two.

He never seemed to feel too awkward talking about it with me. I guess the awkwardness wears off at a certain point after you've been balls-deep in a gal. But I noticed that, when I would talk about my mom and Mike, he asked about her a lot but it was awkward. I figured he was still feeling a bit... I don't know, like he fucks his mom daily and that's not normal? I get that. Sometimes even I get a little twitterpated about it. It isn't normal, but then what is.

But it turned out that part of the reason he has been somewhat reluctant to spread his wings and find his own poontang with ladies of his general age range is that the boy has a thing for older women. I mean, who can blame him, right? Don't all answer at once. But also, who can blame him? He's never had a girl his own age, he's pretty hung up on his mom, and while Sveta isn't aged and decrepit she's still old enough to matter.

And the upshot of all this is that, one day, we were talking and he blurted out, "Since you get to do it with my mom, I thought maybe I could with your mom?" Bless his heart.

My mom, as I believe I've said in the past, is a dynamite lady, well worth the effort, and though she hasn't expanded her stable of lovers the way my father has, it's mostly because she isn't feeling as sexual as once she did. Not non-sexual at all, but perfectly satisfied with what she's got. Plus, she confided in me one time that she just feels too old to go looking for a bit of tail, as she put it.

Well, I let his comment mostly slide, laughed it off like a joke, but the wheels started turning. We talked some more about older women, how he likes that they know what they want (not always true, but it is an advantage) and they make him feel like a big man (definitely not always true, but his mom certainly fits the bill here). And as I said, I let it slide from there into something less awkward. And then after I got off the call with him, I called my mom. At that point there was nothing which could be done about it, but I believe her exact words were, "A teen boy wants to fuck me? Why are you even asking my permission? Dad will love it too. He's worried I don't get enough at home."

So things had to wait there, mostly. I say mostly because my mother surprised me by being a horrible lech and sending me some erotic photos. I didn't know the old gal had it in her. I passed those on after testing the waters a little with Liam, and he wanted to call my mom up and thank her by jerking off while looking at them. I told him that maybe he should just write her a nice thank you note.

Fast forward to vaccinations, and we were safe to move ahead with this little plan, except I'd never cleared it with his mom. Stupid oversight. And then things kept getting in the way. But finally, finally the day arrived and all the pieces lined up on the chessboard or whatever that mixed metaphor actually means.

We decided it would be best to do it at my house. Honestly I think Liam was a little intimidated by the idea of my dad, and Kate... I think she was intimidated by the idea of my mom. Didn't want her baby to fuck this other mother in her bed or something. I get it, I guess. Kate's never been intimidated by me or Sveta but that's different I suppose.

Sveta was out, I was really only there to make sure the door got unlocked and then I was going to stay well clear of the bedroom. Not my shindig. I can respect boundaries. Kate dropped Liam off, looking slightly reluctant, like it was his first day of school. I'd talked with her about it, how she was going to have to let him leave the nest a little eventually or he'd wind up being unable to experience the full range of life's experience, that kind of thing. She accepted it, but maybe wasn't totally happy with it.

My mom showed up a few minutes late, because of course she did. I had been on the verge of asking Liam if he wanted me to blow him or something to take the edge off. I don't know, I'm hospitable like that. Plus he has a very nice young cock. Mostly the unselfish motive.

They both looked like they didn't quite know what to do, but I wasn't going to intervene, and finally, bravo for Liam, he made the first move and asked, somewhat shyly, if Mom wanted to go upstairs or start right there. I could see the tent in his pants. Give the kid credit, most teenagers would have been flaccid and trembling right about then.

I suggested upstairs because they could have privacy, and Mom shook herself out of her awkwardness finally and said, "Yes, I think Liam and I would like some alone time," and up the stairs they went.

My house is not big. The amount of privacy you can get in my bedroom is not much. I am a horrible person who was eavesdropping, but only so I could accurately report it later to you, gentle reader. I didn't really eavesdrop much. Didn't catch conversation. They were chatting or pursuing mild foreplay for a while, then the bed started to creak a little, and I confess I did sneak upstairs so I could hear better, for you, not for me. I was certainly not rubbing myself and picturing the two of them.

"Is it okay?" Liam asked. The bed was creaking rhythmically.

"Oh honey, it's wonderful," Mom replied.

"Am I allowed to kiss you?"

"Allowed? Of course you can kiss me." There was quiet creaking for a while, probably because they were kissing.

"Does your mom like it like this?" my mom asked. I came. Not gonna lie. That's a sexy question to hear your mother ask a teen boy in your bed.

"Yeah, she likes it when I go from behind too."

"You want me from behind?"

"Yes ma'am."

"No funny business about my ass though, okay honey. I know my daughter loves it up there but some women don't."

"It's okay. Your pussy feels amazing. I can't believe you..."

"What?"

"I can't believe you had four babies. I thought after that..."

Mom laughed. "If you like older women, you're going to find that we have plenty of life left in us." There was movement, probably my mom assuming the position. "Go on, fuck me like you like. I won't break."

More vigorous creaking and wet slapping noises ensued.

"I'm gonna..."

"Go on honey, you can't get me pregnant."

Liam doesn't make a tremendous amount of noise when he cums, but there were the general cum noises. "I'll be ready again in a minute."

"Oh you young men." Positions shifting. "So you really liked the pictures?"

"Yes ma'am. I... um... can't believe you look like that still."

"I'm flattered but maybe don't try that line with anyone else," Mom laughed.

"Did I do okay?"

"Better than okay. Most boys your age wouldn't last two pumps."

"But you didn't... cum."

"I will if we go again. I was a little nervous, can you believe it?"

"Why?"

"It's been a long time since I've been with anyone new," Mom admitted.

"Did you like it?"

"I'm asking you to go again aren't I?"

There was some more general chat, then Liam asked if he could suck my mom's tits, like she was going to refuse. That led to more rhythmic creaking, and moans, and Mom came, or she said she did. I know Mom's not as orgasmic as I am, but while she might have been playing it up a little for his confidence, I've been fucked by him and I can testify that she probably came.

He lasted longer this time, until she asked him if he needed a break and wanted a ride, and hell yes he wanted my mom to ride him because he's a polite boy and knows when to take a hint. I am afraid that all the women in his life are spoiling him a little, that he'll wind up with a gal who needs different things and he won't know how to react to someone who has a hard time cumming. But that's a worry for later. More creaking, louder moans, and then he fired another load up into the pussy that gave birth to me, which is just about the hottest thing.

Mom needed a break after that, and I think Liam did too, even though he was trying to be tough and act like he didn't. I made myself scarce and they came down naked and glistening. "How was it?" I asked.

"Excellent," Mom said.

Liam looked like he was ready to prove his manhood right there. "Your mom's the best," he said. "I loved it."

"All done?" I asked, mostly to see what reaction I'd get.

"I can go again," Liam practically shouted.

"I need a minute or three," sighed my mom.

"I can keep him warm for you," I offered slyly. That I was wearing nothing but a very wet set of panties to cover my pubis had nothing to do with it.

"Actually," Liam said, looking both shy and eager, "you know what would make my birthday really special?"

Which is how Mom and I wound up lying side by side, holding hands, on the bed as Liam gleefully and fairly expertly ate us both out in turns, then proceeded to fuck each of us, looking down. My mom was okay with that much, and it gave the kid a huge thrill, to the point that he came on Mom's belly and was almost immediately hard again for a fourth time, into me and out again, into Mom and out, swapping us back and forth until I begged him to stick with me long enough to get me off, which he did, then switched back to Mom and finished inside her.

He confessed to me later that he wished I had been his mom, that he could have swapped between his mom and mine. I'm not sure how Kate would feel about that, not right now.

We cleaned up, got dressed, and had takeout Chinese when Sveta came home. I think Liam was almost ready to try for five, but Mom announced that she really had to get going, and so we called Kate to pick Liam up. He's old enough to drive but doesn't have his license yet. Go fig.

So that was an eventful day, and damn if Sveta didn't want to hear all the details and we wound up fucking. And for some reason I was exhausted after that and fell right asleep. I've been keeping odd hours lately. What's new, right?

Updates

What have I been up to, you may ask.

1) Sveta and I got married. Mostly for tax purposes, we like to say, and I'd be lying if that wasn't part of the calculus. Another part was that if either of us had to go to the hospital (which it turned out was prescient, about which more further down the page) it would be good to be married for the purposes of sorting through that kind of bullshit. And there was definitely an element of, "If we don't do it now, we may not be allowed to do it in future," which as yet has not turned out to be as prescient, but please don't relax on the LGBTQI-rights front.

It didn't really change our relationship, and we didn't want it to, but it was nice. I love her, she loves me, we're married, and it's still strange to say, "my wife," in conversation. Partially because I didn't think it would ever happen, partially because I figured I'd have to get straight-married. Lesbian-married is better because we both got to wear dresses.

The ceremony was nothing exciting. We had a wedding party afterward which didn't immediately degenerate into debauchery because the in-laws were there. Sveta's father was surprisingly supportive. Sveta's mother-in-law looked like she could spit nails. But anyway, the party was nice, just friends and well-wishes, and then some of us had gotten hotel rooms in the same hotel so we did wind up having a bit of a fun time for our wedding night. It's been long enough that I don't know that I can play-by-play it even if I wanted to, but Sveta finally got to fuck the members of the family she'd been missing on her card and when we finished with Sheri, Mari (yes, she came, and yes, she came), and Mike, there was a whole other party with some of our friends who showed us a very nice time as well.

2) My parents are okay. Mike and my sisters are okay. There have been some health things, but nothing major. Mari finally tied the knot with her long-time partner, though there was no corresponding wingding for that. I'm still not sure how much her partner knows about her family. She was very nice at the wedding but didn't show up for any of the more sexual festivities. It's Mari's life. I'm not judging. Much.

3) I had to have my lady parts removed. Well, a lot of them. The pain just got to be too much, and finally I found a doctor who would listen and not think I was making it up, and it turned out that yeah, the uterus and one of the ovaries needed to go. The operation went smoothly, the recovery went smoothly, and aside from some lingering psychological stuff which made me somewhat wary at first, I have been having pain-free orgasms in the quantities to which I used to be accustomed ever since. Of course...

4) Then COVID hit, so until I got my vaccination, Sveta and I were stuck with just each other as partners, which didn't put much strain on the relationship but did make me wish like hell I knew a magic spell to give one or both of us a cock temporarily. We had to stop seeing everyone. Even Zoe, who...

5) Zoe is still a thing in our lives. She has a girlfriend now, but we see her often enough, now that we're all vaccinated. I think she was a little crushed that I married Sveta, but she came to the wedding (this was prior to her getting a girlfriend) and participated in the after-after-party, wherein she got fucked seventeen ways to Sunday by a bunch of hot lesbians, which I think got her over her infatuation with me. Or maybe not, but she hasn't shown any signs of pining over me that I've seen. It's complicated. I wish it weren't.

6) Kate, Liam, and Kevin are also continuing to be seen by us. Let me try that sentence again. We see Kate, Liam, and Kevin as often as we all can spare the time. Kevin came out a few Prides ago, we were all super proud of him, and both he and his brother have found partners outside the home, though it doesn't seem to last. They're young. I won't start worrying just yet.

7) Anything else I'm forgetting? Pop a question in the comments, or email, or write it in fiery letters across the sky above my house.

TMI Tuesday

From the archives:

1. For you, what is sexy time?

It's either totally spontaneous and whatever or, if I'm planning it, it's a nice, unhurried time of comfort, joy, and possibly a little exploration.  I like my sexy time to be able to breathe.  I don't want to be thinking about stuff I have to do later or deadlines.  I don't often get that, so most of my sex isn't really sexy time per se, I suppose.

2. If your best friend asked, “Do you think I’m sexy?” What would you say?

"Absolutely."  I don't think I've ever had a best friend with whom I couldn't be that honest.  I'm not saying I've never had a best friend with whom I've had sex, but if they asked, I would be honest with them.  Some have.  Frankly, most of the time that question doesn't mean, "Do you want to fuck right now?"  It's seeking reassurance that they're sexy, and I'm happy to give that reassurance.

3. If your Mom or Dad asked, “How’s your love life?” Would you answer? What would you tell them?

This question's easy too.  I'd answer and tell them as much or as little as I felt like telling them.  I'm not always completely open-book about my sex life with my parents, but if they ask how sex is going for me, I will at least give them a general idea.  These days, I don't hold back, since often enough they're asking because they want to know how my medical difficulties are going.  But I won't necessarily tell them every detail of every sexual encounter I've had since the last time we talked or anything.  I know what information they're looking for.

When I was younger, my father used to ask me because it was his opening move: "Hey Lexi, how's your sex life?"  And I would answer, "Not so good that I couldn't do with a bit more."  And then we'd fuck.  As I've gotten older, it's more of a joke with us: I'll ask him and he'll say the same thing.  But it wasn't like it was a constant question, nor is that the only way we initiate.

4. A young 8-year-old neighbor asks you, “What is the birds and the bees?” How do you reply?

You wouldn't expect this, but I'll probably say, "That's something you should ask your parents about."  Because I wouldn't want my neighbor giving my child sex ed, even in the most chaste way possible.  Of course, if I know their parents (I don't, and I don't have any 8 year old neighbor kids asking me this, but hypothetically) I might know a more specific way to respond.  But I'm not in the business of teaching sex to kids whose parents will get pissed if I do.  I'd love to because people should know about sex, and I'm not at all saying that I would teach these kids anything more than perfectly appropriate stuff, but I'd rather not poke the bear, honestly.  That makes me a little sad, but I just don't have the energy to fight it.

5. What would you do if your lover’s turn on is your turn off?

Well, we'd definitely have to talk about it.  I've done some things for lovers in the past which weren't my thing because they were their thing, but if I was with this person steadily and the only thing they wanted to do was something I hated doing, that would be a problem and we'd probably go our separate ways.  That has yet to happen in any relationship I've been in.

Bonus: What does it mean to be a man?

Whatever you want it to mean.  I mean, it would be nice if it didn't mean toxic masculinity, but other than that, I'm not going to police gender.  If your conception of being a man works for you and isn't hurting anyone, I don't care what it is.  That's not much of an answer, but really, whose business is it what being a man means to anyone as long as it works and doesn't hurt anyone?

TMI Tuesday

From the archives:

1. If you and your significant other played “sexual truth or dare” with other couples, would you rather watch your s.o. have sex with someone or would you prefer having sex with someone in front of your s.o.?

At this point, I'd probably take one for the team and let Sveta fuck.  I like watching her, and she'd likely get more out of it than I would, plus I'd get things out of watching.  She's fun to watch.  And if the whole time I was thinking, "You may have her now, but she's going home with me," who's going to know?

2. Would you rather watch your favorite porn with your sibling or read your favorite sexy erotica out loud to your parent(s)?

I've done the former.  As strange as it might be to say, I think I might feel awkward about the latter.  That's odd to think about, having never really considered it before.  So I'd happily watch any porn at all with any/all of my siblings.

Odder still, though I have watched porn with my parents, I'd still rather watch it with my siblings.  My mother's taste in porn isn't bad, but it's pretty vanilla.  My father and I like some of the same things, but neither of them are into the weirder stuff, whereas Sheri or Mike and I can watch strange porn and laugh about it.  Mari would be mostly into girl/girl, which isn't bad, but I like penises in my porn.  Girl/girl stuff just doesn't make me cum, though I like multiple naked women just fine.  I like to see penetration, I guess.  Strapons would probably work, but it's still not the same.  I don't know why.  Just my particular kink, I guess.  Mari also doesn't particularly care about watching lesbian sex per se.  She enjoys naked women.  If there are more than one of them, hey, that's just more than one naked woman.  But she's also the least into porn in general, although maybe Mom is right there with her.

3. To get sexually aroused, would you rather watch girl on girl porn or guy on guy porn?

As a continuation, you'd think that I'd go for guy on guy, but actually I don't find gay porn that arousing.  I mean, being in the room with gay sex is great, but it still doesn't make me cum.  At least with two girls I can ogle two girls.  But while I confess a slight preference for girl on girl, either will work in a pinch.  There are genres of both that I don't get into, but if the guys look good, I'm fine with that too.

4. Would you rather have sex with your boss, in an office conference room or masturbate at home knowing that your neighbor is watching?

My current boss and I would never have sex.  Ever.  He's gay, for one, but even if he was going to throw me a bone, while I like him, I am not at all attracted to him.  In the general question though, even if I would have sex with my boss given the chance, I would probably rather be watched masturbating by a neighbor.  I'm shy, but if I knew what was happening, I could get into the exhibitionism of it.

It's the consequences which really throw this question for a loop though.  Being watched by a neighbor is a bit creepy, and if the neighbor is creepy, I would worry a bit.  But fucking the boss is just never a good idea.  I've done it and the best you can hope for is that the sex is good and then you never see each other again.  And a neighbor talking about having watched you masturbate is embarrassing for them, whereas a boss doesn't have as much blowback, even if you don't assume the sex was entirely consensual.  So I'm sticking with my answer.  I never see my neighbors anyway, and if they watched me spank it and then gave me knowing looks, I'd deal.

5. Based on your current mood, would you rather try out new and kinky sex ideas or have romantic sex?

Romantic.  That is definitely not always true, but at the time of this writing, I just want a nice, sensual session with a trusted partner.  I mean, I get that frequently, but it doesn't mean I don't continue to want it.  And I miss some of my past partners with whom I was quite romantic, so if this is a genie/wish situation, I'd like to spend some time with them.

Bonus: Would you rather have three kids and no money or no kids with three million dollars?

This may sound very strange, but though I have a serious pregnancy fetish, I don't really want to have kids.  I mean, if it were possible I'd have them, I guess, but in the situation described, I wouldn't feel right bringing three children into a world where they would be poor.  Hell, given the way the world is currently going, I don't know that I would bring kids into it even if I were given the millions.  And I could really use the money.  So where do I go to collect the check?

Out of My Comfort Zone

So it's another work story.  Not that I work in such a slutty place or anything, just that it's the only reason I leave the house at the moment.

One of the perks of my job is that I currently work at a theater where they do things other than theatre (notice how pretentious my spelling is?).  So I get to watch dance and concerts and so forth.  This evening, there was a rehearsal for a concert coming up in a few days, which meant that I basically sat around and got paid.  I am totally fine with this.

But one of the musicians was this woman whom I wouldn't normally find attractive at all.  She was a nice-looking woman, but she was definitely too old for me.  Possibly even as old as my mother.  I love my mother, but in women I tend to skew young.  Not always, but even when I lust after someone who's older than I am, it's usually someone who looks younger and isn't much older than I am.  I know, I'm a terrible person, but it's just the way my attractions go.

To keep from having to refer to her as "the musician who is older than I usually find attractive," let's call her Jen (as a side note, I've never gotten into the whole "anonymize people by just using their first initial" thing because I like names rather than letters and also because it's not anonymous enough, so while I do try to pick names which I think fit the person, don't expect them to be close to their actual names; Sveta is not Russian, for example).  Jen has long gray hair, she plays a woodwind, she's curvy in a way which is fairly attractive, and she has these sad, beautiful eyes.  I've seen her smile but her eyes still look like pools of sorrow.  But beautiful sorrow.  And that's what initially made me notice her.  I didn't lust after her because of her eyes, but they were pretty eye-catching.

Anyway, rehearsal is over, she's packing up, and I ask her if I could close up or something along those lines.  Not hurrying her along, but hurrying her along.  It was getting late and I wanted to lock up.  She smiled with those sad eyes and said no thank you, then she looked at me and said something which... let me back up.

I've been feeling pretty lousy lately.  There's been a marked drop off in quantity of posting around here, as you might have noticed, and that's because I've been in a slump.  I'm a depressive.  I get this way.  Eventually I'll probably pull out of it.  But anyway, I've been holding on to sanity by my fingernails some days.

So she looked at me, and said, with these sad eyes and this very nice tone, "You really are a beautiful young woman, you know that?"  We'd spoken previously in the evening, so it wasn't out of the blue, but we certainly hadn't spoken on the subject of my being beautiful.  It hit me like a ton of bricks.  She didn't mean it sexually, she was just saying it to be nice I think, but I really needed to hear that from someone I guess because I practically burst into tears.

She thought she'd said something wrong.  She was apologizing and saying that she didn't mean anything by it and so forth, and I managed to pull myself together and tell her it was okay, that it was very nice of her to say and that I was just having one of those days.  And then we started talking.  Everyone else left and we were still talking.  I don't remember half of the conversation.  It wasn't important.  She was a good listener, but I also learned that she was a lesbian because that all came up in the whole, "Being queer around here is difficult," phase of the conversation.

And then she somehow managed to get me to talk about my medical difficulties and I was breaking down again and I found myself being held by this woman whom I didn't really know.  It was nice.  And then, well, it was so nice that I kissed her.  I don't know if I intended it to be a come-on; I was just overloaded.

She pulled back a little.  "I hope I'm not giving you the wrong idea," she said, and I was kicking myself inwardly because clearly she wasn't at all interested in me and what the fuck was I doing and shame spiral and so forth.  "I don't want to take advantage of you in a fragile situation. I'm sorry if I was out of line complimenting you earlier.  I just... you are a beautiful young woman and it made me happy to look at you, I guess."

Nope.  She was apologizing for leading me on because she thought she was leading me in a direction I didn't want to go.  Oh Jen, you are adorably wrong about that.

"You're not taking advantage of me," I said.

"Oh."  Her eyes were limpid pools.  Seriously, I wish I could share a picture without compromising identities, because they were beautiful sad eyes.  Then she leaned back in and kissed me back.

And things got a bit more heated.  I love women who aren't afraid to kiss me.  I find that plenty of women, even if they're curious, are terrified to kiss another woman.  Jen was not scared of me at all.  "We really shouldn't do this," she said after a moment of increasingly passionate kissing.  "I feel like I'm taking advantage of you."

I also love that she wasn't saying, "We shouldn't do this, it's forbidden."  Porn is so much more boring than real life sometimes.  It clearly wasn't something she was shying away from because she was trying desperately to repress her forbidden urges or some such nonsense.

"I promise, you're not."  This carried some weight because I was unbuttoning her blouse as I said it.  But then I had a bit of clarity.  "But we shouldn't do this here.  Someone might come in and that would be awkward."

We moved off the front of the stage in front of God and everyone to a more secluded location. We didn't go hide in another room because I was pretty sure we were the last people there, but no point in taking chances.  And then I proved just how not-taken-advantage-of I was by slowly undressing her.  Jen's body is different than I'm used to, I have to admit.  Definite signs of aging, and she's not exactly in shape.  But honestly, I didn't care and still don't.  She was definitely not wearing "gonna fuck tonight" underwear: her bra was built for comfort, not speed.  But you know what?  The hell with speed.  Women should be allowed to be comfortable even if they're gonna fuck tonight.

Her skin was very soft, and she smelled of baby powder, which I find incredibly arousing actually.  And her breasts, once I got the bra off, were worth the effort.  Whatever she does to maintain them, it works.  They're large, with a little droop, but the nipples are still perky and very sensitive, as I found when she started moaning softly as I circled one with my tongue.  When I started sucking on it, she arched her back a little and held my hand in hers and squeezed it.

What was she keeping under her skirt?  I had to know.  Turns out her panties were likewise sensible but still cute, plain white cotton (which I also find arousing), not granny panties at all.  And the best part was that the fabric covering her pussy was drenched already.

I didn't waste much time getting those off, spreading her legs, and there was her pussy.  A light fuzz of gray was the only thing giving away that this pussy had probably seen a few miles.  Jen is fairly dark complexioned and the lips were tan, but they were cute little lips and just dripping wet.  I dove in.  I couldn't wait.  She had both of my hands in hers, our fingers knitted together, so I couldn't do anything but use my tongue.  She had very little taste, just the smell of baby powder I already mentioned, a little sweat but not stink, and a hint of the usual vaginal tastes.  And she was responsive.  I ran my tongue up over the slit and lingered a moment on the clit and she spread her legs wider and practically forced her vulva up into my mouth.

She was fun to eat out.  Doing it hands-free, at least to start, was a novelty (which I think I'm going to incorporate into my repertoire with Sveta, although I know my girl will take some fingers to really get going).  And I could look up and see those beautiful sad eyes look down at me while I worked her up until she gasped, "Oh Lexi, I'm so close, please make me cum!"  Like she needed to ask my permission.  She freed my hands and I put my fingers to work, and when that happened she was pulling me up again, pulled off my shirt, pulling me into an embrace with my fingers inside her.

We ground into each other, kissing, embracing, both hungry for skin to skin contact, until finally my fingers hit a sweet spot and she moaned weakly and buried her head in my neck, whispering, "Right there, don't stop!"  Finally after she held me about as close as was possible without somehow merging bodies, she started breathing again, sighed, and relaxed a little, then smiled with those sad eyes and said, "Do you know how long it's been?"

No, I did not, so I got a bit of her life.  It isn't easy being a lesbian in this town.  There's one gay bar for gay guys in the area and if you want anything else you've got to go to the nearest big city, which is hours.  And she's too old for online dating.  So she's very lonely.

We talked and it was my turn to listen and I was happy to do so.  We just held each other, me half-naked, her totally naked, and cuddled and talked.  And then I finally said, "Well, if it's been so long, I can't let it go at just one."

"First I want to see that beautiful body without those bulky clothes on," she said, smiling.  It was a little strange, being in the position of being the junior member of a same-sex duo.  Usually I'm the experienced one.  And who knows, maybe I was more experienced than Jen was in the bedroom, but she was definitely playing the role I usually play in these sorts of relationships.  And I enjoyed that as a novelty too.  I think I may like being the "older sister" more, but it reminded me of Mari, who was always the older sister in our relationship.

I wish to add that my clothes weren't bulky.  I too wasn't wearing "gonna fuck tonight" underwear, or even clothes.  Just my usual work attire.  The shirt was already off, the pants came off too, and then I let her kiss me and take my bra and panties off, then after she'd enjoyed herself with my breasts a little she leaned back and said, "Lexi, you really are beautiful."  It almost made me cry again, but I held it together.  I'm not trying to toot my own horn here; I don't think I'm beautiful most days.  Particularly not now.  But she was enjoying herself.  "Lie back.  I want to taste that cute little flower."

I let her spread my legs and kiss gently up my thighs, teasing her way between until her breath was hot against my cunt.  "I'm probably not going to be able to cum," I told her apologetically.

"I like a challenge," she said, looking up at me with those beautiful sad eyes.  I could keep hitting the thesaurus for synonyms for beautiful and sad, but that's what they were.  And then she slid two fingers deftly into me and started doing something inside me which was very, very pleasant indeed.  After a moment she pulled her fingers out and sucked them into her mouth.  "I'd almost forgotten what a girl your age tastes like," she said with a smile, then slid in again and kept doing whatever she was doing.  I'm no slouch when it comes to pussy manipulation, but she was doing some move I couldn't quite place.  There was "come-hither" motions, but a little twisting as well, and it got me to the point of painful arousal quicker than I expected.

"Am I hurting you?" she asked, looking worried.  I guess I winced or something in between panting for more.

"God, please don't stop," I begged her.  It hurt.  Not going to lie.  But it also felt incredible.  I tried to relax, to put the pain behind the wall of pleasure, and it sort of worked until she started licking my clit and I came, harder than I have in a while, which set off all the savage pains that a softer orgasm usually avoids and snapped me right back out of it.  I got one or two hard waves before I realized I was moaning rather more loudly than I meant to and she was apologizing and wrapping me up in her arms.

After I managed to assure her that it wasn't her fault and that I wasn't dying and was in fact incredibly impressed with her technique, we snuggled again briefly before snuggling turned to kissing turned to my fingers sliding into her again and then I tried my best to match her technique, with some helpful pointers.  She wasn't as turned on to start so we could even discuss a few of the finer points, and you'd better believe I'm going to add some things to my arsenal.  Eventually though I got her worked up again and she made it clear that she was totally ready for me to suck on her clit until it broke off if necessary, so I did that, smelling that baby powder and woman smell which was super arousing, until with my tongue and lips and fingers I managed to get a long, tense moan out of her, then I sped up until she gasped and said, "Oh fuck," in a surprised tone and tightened down on my fingers until I was afraid I'd lose circulation.  "The clit, fuck, the clit," she gasped, and I kept hitting her clit hard, trying to keep her cumming as long as I could, until finally she relaxed and pulled me up into her arms again.

We kissed, and then we realized that we'd probably been going at it for so long that it was no longer just a little late.  So we had to say goodbye.  She gave me her number, "Not to hook up, just in case you need someone to talk to," and then we both left and went our separate ways.  And while I believe she's local, I have no idea if I'll ever see her again.  We were both pretty clear that we weren't looking for this to be a long-term thing.  I think we both just needed it.  Needed sex, needed love, needed to be told we were beautiful, needed to cry, whatever it was.

Sometimes I wish that my mother were open to making love with me.  Most of the time, I'm fine with it, but sometimes I wish.  Maybe that's all this was.  Or maybe not.  I don't know.  I can still see Jen's eyes.  The rest of her was pretty, but her eyes were beautiful.  I wonder if she'll remember me at all.

Family Update

A short one because I've also realized that I haven't talked about my family in a while. Again, it's not due to any problems, but rather because it's been nice but business as usual. And I get bored with business as usual. That's my issue.

You may recall way back when that my father had been having some health problems. I'm pleased to report that he's recovered, at least mostly. He is getting older, so some things are just the way they are. He's still a randy old dog. It takes him a bit more effort to get it up, but we're willing to put in the effort, and once the effort has been put in (this effort is usually pretty fun for all involved) he lasts even longer than he previously did, but has no trouble getting off, particularly inside one of his favorite girls.

Sveta gets more of him then I do. She sometimes visits my parents when I'm unable. I was a little jealous about it for a while, I admit, but we talked about it and I'm really just jealous of sex. We've been working in that too, and I don't begrudge her all the loving she can get. When I was going through a rough patch a while back, Sveta had physical needs I couldn't help with, so she got her needs filled by Dad, and that was good for both of them.

Mom is fine too. She and Dad have experienced something of a sexual Renaissance since all the kids have finally left the nest. I felt guilty about that because it seemed like the fact that Dad had me in the house meant he'd go for me rather than her. But Mom said that wasn't true; her libido isn't that high and she was getting what she needed.

But now, they're like kids again. We went over to their place the other day and found them watching porn on the couch, her sitting in his lap and rocking slowly. They didn't stop and we had a conversation while she had him buried inside her. She broke off after a few minutes and said, "Okay kids, momma needs to cum," and then she hopped up and got on her hands and knees, her dress around her waist, and Dad started eating her out, then when she got close he got behind her and fucked her, hard, until she was moaning his name and, "Harder, harder!"

Then when she'd cum, she said, "Okay daddy, fill me up quick so I can get dinner started." And Dad sped up and finally pushed home and fired away. I'd be lying if Sveta and I weren't both cheering him on.

So Dad gets regular visits to Pussytown at home, but Mom's still okay with him getting some side action. She says it makes him friskier at home. So he's got, wait for it, a twenty-something chippy. My Dad is such a stud.

She's actually the daughter of one of his friends. They met at a function that my Dad was dreading going to, but then there she was, cute as a button. She's a tiny little thing. Looks younger than she is. When he found out how old she actually was, he said, he was shocked. So they were flirting a little, just innocent stuff, but she was putting her hand on his. He told her, eventually, "I'm old enough to be your father and I'm married."

She replied, "I like older men," and he figured okay, green light.

"This thing is pretty boring..." he said, master of subtlety that he is.

"You got somewhere to go?"

He said that yes, he could think of a few more interesting places. So they went to a restaurant for drinks. Or rather he bought her a drink because my Dad doesn't drink any more. They had a snack. Then she said, "This still isn't that interesting, is it?"

"What were you thinking?"

She put her hand in his lap and that was pretty much all that needed to be said. They went back to her apartment and he showed her just how much fun an older man can be.

He figured okay, one-time thing, but she said she liked him. Then he thought, okay, going to have to disabuse her of any idea that this is going to be serious, but she told him she wasn't interested in serious either. She's a bit married to her work, doesn't really want to date, and is totally fine with being a fuck-buddy.

She's fucked several of my dad's friends, turns out. She lost her virginity to one of them when she was 16 and decided that she really preferred older men. Had a steady boyfriend in college for a year or two but then broke that off because she cheated on him with a professor.

So, kind of my kind of gal. I'd love to meet her. Mom has, says she's lovely. Yes, Mom knows all about this. Dad doesn't bring her home or anything, but she knows Mom knows and she thinks that's just fine.

She needs a name. Irina. That's a good name. Anyway, Irina isn't exclusive with Dad either; she tells him stories about his friends. None of them are in the same situation: one of them is single and the other is a widower. But she's had married men before and doesn't care.

She did ask him if he wanted his wife to join, and Dad said no, Mom's not interested, but then Mom told him she might be, so who knows, maybe my parents will have a threesome with a cute girl. I'd love to be there for that, but that's not going to happen.

Anyway, that's my parents. It got longer than I thought it would, but they're fun to talk about when I get going.

Back to the Grind

I've been getting very bad about play-by-play. Maybe it's because it no longer interests me that much. Maybe I'm just lazy. But in lieu of a recounting of events, here are some snippets of holiday cheer which will maybe montage over some of the gaps.

• My midnight kiss with Sveta on New Year's Eve (or Day, whatever) was magical. Probably the best kiss I've ever had. I know it's just another second of yet another day, but it meant a lot to me, and I think to her as well.
• Seeing Mike, however briefly, for the holidays was wonderful too. I think the moment that best encapsulates the wonderfulness of it was when he teared up when I told him how much I missed him. I don't know if he'll be seen any more regularly, but he knows how I feel.
• The sex was pretty incredible, if thinner on the ground than one might expect. Sveta and I are both happily taken care of in the anal department. God, having a cock in my ass after what felt like forever since the last time... I felt like I was a virgin again. I actually had to have him slow down a little because it was too tight.
• Best gift: family love. Okay, that was bullshit sentimentality, but true anyway. Best commercial gift: Amazon money. I'm not going to lie; I love to shop on Amazon, and getting some credit to do that is a gift in and of itself. And then, of course, all the prices shot up.
• Best gift that keeps on giving: extremely cute panties which I gave to Sveta as a little lagniappe and wound up enjoying perhaps more than the main gift I gave her. They were on sale. Cutest damn things ever.
• No sex under the tree this year; our tree was tiny.
• Not really a non-stop bacchanal in any respect Christmas morning. "The kids" woke up, headed downstairs, and found Dad already awake and tapping his foot like he was afraid the gifts were going to turn back into pumpkins or something.
• Christmas evening, on the other hand, was a grade-A love-em-up. Not quantity, but quality.
• New Year's was completely low-key. Sveta and I went out for a bit and by the time midnight rolled around we were both pretty tired, so we kissed (and what a kiss it was, lasted about ten minutes I'd say) and then went to bed.
• Emotions have been running high, so some days have been better than others.
• And now it's back to commuting to Sveta every week at least and wondering where the money is coming from.

In all, not a horrible holiday season, and I hope yours was good too.

Tenors of Love

This is not about some Irish male singing group doing covers of the greatest hits of the 70s on PBS. It'd probably be better if it were, but it's not.

So I've been having a fair amount of emotionally-charged sex recently, as well as, most recently, some physically-debilitated sex as I fight through the Plague (if I started sprouting buboes, I wouldn't be in the slightest bit surprised, actually; I have glands swollen enough to be buboes). Most of the time, the focus in sex is on passion or energy, whether it's rough or not, fast or slow, out of love or out of lust, whether you're just getting through it or wanting more. I know a lot of people probably wouldn't think of sex as an appropriate mechanism for grief either. I'm not saying no one else feels this way, just that I didn't spend a lot of time thinking about it until recently.

Grieving is bizarre because it's like celebrating, only turned on its head. I think the same emotional triggers are there, which is why funerals can be both ways to grieve and to celebrate. And if I can have a celebratory glass of champagne, I can have a sorrowful glass of wine. If I can eat a celebratory dinner, I can eat a funeral feast. (Hamlet's line about funeral meats coldly furnishing forth marriage tables comes to mind here). So if I can have sex in celebration, I can have a sad, sorrowful lovemaking session too.

Loss makes us want to reassure each other that we still have things, and I can't think of a better way to reassure someone that they still have me than to love them, either mentally, spiritually, or physically. Grief gives a particular poignancy to lovemaking which many people have experienced; how many of us have had one last fuck before saying goodbye. But if you can't make love to the dearly departed (and I'm not suggesting for a moment that you should try, either) making love with others who are grieving is a good way to show your love for them and for the one you've lost.

If this suggests that my aunt's funeral was an orgy, it wasn't. It was a very nice service at a church she attended. We missed her, and the people who couldn't be with us for other reasons. I think my Dad missed his parents. And then we went home, and Mom and Dad and I all made love. Not much actual penetration went on; Dad's still having problems and it wasn't really about that. We just cuddled up in the big bed and were together. I think I kissed my mother in a sexier way than I ever have before, and that turned me on, which made me feel guilty for making it about me, which turned me off. I'm not saying it's easy.

Sveta never met my aunt, and that's too bad because they would have gotten along, I think. Aunt Jenny would have been happy for Sveta and me, and Sveta would have liked my aunt's cooking, and also, if this were a perfect world, would have enjoyed getting to make love with another member of my family. But things happen. Still, Sveta and I have enough things to worry and grieve about that adding addition grief didn't really change things; we forget our troubles when making love, as opposed to commemorating them. Sometimes I feel bad about that; I feel like sex shouldn't just be a circus sideshow act to distract us from the mangled body of the lion tamer. Sex is part of life, not an escape from it. But sometimes you need a vacation. It makes us feel better.

And even though I know that I'm sick and weak and shouldn't exert myself, when Sveta turns me on, I have to kiss her, which turns to licking and fingering and rubbing and stroking and all the good things. And while I still feel weak as we make love, the weakness diminishes, and in the afterglow I can almost pretend that I'm not sick. After that, of course, the sickness comes back, and I'm not sure if it just feels this way by comparison or not, but I feel worse sometimes. It's a brief release, if nothing else.

Yet I still do it. And I'm not making love because I feel obligated or forced or I just need to orgasm. It's strange feeling this way. I want to make love. I like cumming, but I want to be with someone physically. Either in sorrow or as an escape from it, I want to love and be loved.

Someday soon I hope, I'll get back to where I was, and I'll feel sexy rather than lonely. I'll cum more often, and I'll enjoy sex in a happy way. I'm not saying I want to give this up, just that there's joy missing right now. My happiness is muted, overcast. I want the sun to shine again.

Buttless Chaps

I've never been that into crazy outfits just for the purpose of sex, outfits that you can only wear for that purpose. I mean, sure, I suppose you could wear crotchless panties out and about under your clothes, for instance, but I'd rather just go without. And things like leather gear or crazy lingerie items, while they can be amusing for an evening, are not something I spend my money on. I don't have anything against them, but I just don't see the need.

Because what I do like is crazy outfits that are fun to fuck in but which can also be used for other reasons, or at least could ostensibly be used for other purposes even if I personally don't. Like my tutu. Or a costume of some sort. Or my school uniform. Any of those things are both spicy in the bedroom and could be worn out, even if I never actually do. I realize that the line between these two things is fairly blurry, but most lines are. This isn't a hard and fast rule, it's just a general inclination.

When I was younger, some well-meaning but misguided friend or relative gave all the kids well-meaning but misguided gifts, and I wound up with the pajamas. I'd say that it was only slightly misguided, because I haven't worn pajamas in my life; I've slept nude pretty much since I was a baby. Clearly I wasn't going to tell this person, "Hey, I sleep naked, take them back." I felt a bit slighted though, because I was of that age. They were kids PJs too, which just made me feel like this well-meaning (I say in hindsight) but misguided person was implying that I was a kid when I really, really wanted to be a grown-up. You know the age I'm talking about. We all went through it. Anyway, the misguided quotient increases slightly when one takes into account the fact that, while they were pink, they were one-piece jobs that had the flap at the back. I didn't know they made them like that any more, certainly not in the size I got, or in pink. I figured the only people who wore things like that were mountain men.

So after polite replies were made, these PJs languished in obscurity for a few years, consigned to a drawer. Something to understand about my family is that we aren't quite as good about getting rid of things we don't need or want as we should be. We're not pack-rats or hoarders, but we tend to make a pile of things which "we should get rid of" and then keep forgetting to get rid of them until they've migrated into places where we don't remember them. Sometimes we carry out surgical strikes against clutter and do eliminate things, but that's a grand adventure, not an ongoing process.

Anyway, at a certain point, after Mike had been deflowered and he and I were going at it like rabbits, one of those surgical strikes was taking place, and the PJs resurfaced. Much fun was made of them, I'm afraid, butt-flap in particular. And then someone said, "I bet you'd still fit into those..." So anti-clutter brigade was put on hold for a few minutes while I wriggled into them. Since I'd never worn them, I'd never seen just how large they were, and while I probably would have been swimming in them before, now they fit. Not a great fit, a bit snug, but that snugness brought out certain attributes of them which wouldn't have been immediately apparent. In a word, hot.

Despite Mom's insistence that we had to keep cleaning, Mike slipped his hand into the flap and started fooling around, goosing me, making me wet, and pretty soon he had the flap open and me on my hands and knees while he fucked me through it. And I couldn't believe that we hadn't done this before. All those wasted opportunities. Because like I've said, I like sex in clothes and I like costumes and I like crazy, and this was a bit of all three.

So for the next few days, those PJs got a workout. Thank goodness it was winter; they were fairly warm and even in the chill I heated up. They got a bit sweaty, and a bit juicy, and while Mike was always fairly contained with his shooting, there were even a few dribbles of cum which leaked out and contaminated things.

It was decided that we couldn't really get rid of the PJs because of the aforementioned, so we kept them, even after the novelty faded and Mike and I moved on to other pursuits. I pulled them out later and tried to get into them for old times' sake but I'd finally gotten too big (not too fat, mind you, but too tall; my ego made me say that). Then, finally, we consigned them to the garbage because there didn't seem to be anything else to do with them.

And now I wish we hadn't, because I'd love to see Sveta in them. Her cute little ass peaking out the back... damn, I'm drenched just picturing it. I may have to go hunting for matching pairs of butt-flap pajamas now. Which gives the lie to all my protestations above; I do like impractical sex-wear, just perhaps of a slightly different type than some.

Car Trips Apparently Make Sveta Horny

I could probably just leave it at the title. Not much mystery there. But I won't because that's no fun.

So Sveta made her way back from the land of Ernst yesterday, showing up on my doorstep in the evening. Despite my title for this post, I don't know that it was the car trip that did it; it may have been being deprived of Ernst's ministrations for the first time in a week, or it may have been that the ministrations revved the motor. Or all three. My ego would like to put in that it could have been that she'd been deprived of my ministrations for a week, but that's less likely.

She was glowing. Not pregnant (I know that's code) but just well-satisfied. Except she couldn't have been that satisfied because it wasn't five minutes before we were in my bed coiled in osculatory bliss. Clothes were shucked (to be fair, I was already pretty much naked) and flesh was pressed and lips locked and temperatures rose and all the good stuff happened that tends to happen with reunion sex. After we got tired of kissing, I gave her breasts full-service treatment, something which I hadn't done in a while, while I slipped first one, then two fingers into her, my palm rubbing her clit while I curled up and stroked her inside. She came on my hand, which was slightly disappointing because I do love to be closer to the action when it happens, but she really enjoyed the twin sensations of fingers and lips on her nipples.

Then she ate me out, "to prove I haven't forgotten how," she said with a giggle. She hadn't forgotten anything. I tell you, sometimes I think back to the awkward, shy girl she was when I first met her and it breaks my brain just a little to think about the transformation. I wonder whether her friends or relatives have noticed, not that they'd notice that suddenly she was really good at going down on women (and men, or so I hear) but that she's blossomed a little. She does hide it; in public, it's not like she's suddenly become outgoing and pushy or anything like that. But there's a new confidence in her. It's inspiring. Or something like that.

Then we went downstairs and Sveta told me and Mom and Dad all about her trip. My statements to the affect that she got plenty are true, but since he was at his parents' house, "plenty" wasn't as much as either of them could have had, given privacy. Ernst's family sounds nice, if perhaps not as sexually open as mine; they didn't mind him having his girlfriend visit, and they turned a blind eye to the fact that her bed was never slept in. But it wasn't a colossal free-for-all of sex, unfortunately, which may be the real explanation why she was so happy to see me. I wish Ernst could have come to my house, because in a week, Sveta and I could have milked him dry. But it's okay; she got to express her independence a little, travel on her own, and get, if not as much as she would have liked, at least more than a little action.

She did drop what wasn't much of a bombshell really; she and Ernst have finally joined the bareback club. I knew at some point they would, no matter how ill-advised it might be. I can't even be outraged because I almost never made guys wear condoms in college. Actually, I would say that most of the times when a guy fucked me with a condom, it was his choice rather than mine. My parents made the obligatory noises of concern and then said, "Okay, fine, you're old enough to know better," and left it at that. We're getting her to the doctor to get checked out, but what can you do, really? I'm not a sterling example in this department, and it's not like Sveta's never had a guy without a condom before. If Ernst were some random hookup, maybe I'd be a bit more shocked, but they've been practically monogamous for months. It was time, and she's on the pill, and whether I worry a little hypocritically or not, she can make her own decisions. Do as I say, not as I do, has never worked well for me.

The first time, it was actually because he didn't have any condoms available. So he pulled out. But then she told him that she was very, very interested in a little internal action, and he said, okay, twist my arm (actually, she didn't say whether he was thrilled or reticent, but if I'd been he, I would have been thrilled) and they dispensed with condoms and pulling out for the remainder of the trip. She had this look on her face when she talked about feeling his cum inside her that I know well, and I'm afraid she's a hopeless creampie addict just like I am. It was tough to keep my hands off her after that; she just looked so sexy talking about it. So I called Dad in for support and together the two of us went to town on Sveta, until she was trying hard to eat me out while being delved expertly by Dad's nimble tongue. After an orgasm by yours truly, she flipped around and let me work on her while she worked on Dad, and she managed to get an orgasm out of him after some effort and an O on her own part, which was nice for everyone. I looked up at one point and saw Mom stroking herself and watching too, which was nice to think about.

She had to go home a little wobbly and sweaty, but definitely still glowing. I hope her family doesn't notice and think something's amiss.

So that was Sveta's road trip. And now that she's back and will need some more creampies with her new supplier cut off, I have additional leverage on Dad to get him to try out some things to maybe make that happen. I'm shameless, but it's for his own good. He really needs to recover physically so he can recover mentally, and I'm trying to be encouraging and supportive rather than pushy, but I might have to push a little. Expect to hear more about that soon, because I'm not leaving it alone.

21 Questions Group Play

Okay, because work got out early, I decided to steal 21 Questions from France (who in turn got it from someone else). But it's not just me answering this time. I asked Sveta, Mom, and Dad to answer as well, because trivia loves company.

My answers are in red, Sveta's are in pink, Mom's are in green, and Dad's are in blue. Yes, I'll probably screw this up, which is why I'll be labeling our dialogue as well, since it was more of a conversation on topics than a Q&A session. And since I was transcribing, I edited a bit too.

1. Sex in a cemetery or a Walmart bathroom?

ME: Bathroom. They keep them fairly clean. I mean, if any of you died, I'd come and have sex on your grave, just so you could watch from the afterlife, but until then...

SVETA: Only if you made me would I do either.

DAD: I've had sex in a cemetery.

MOM: Me too.

ME: Where haven't you had sex?

DAD: The White House?

MOM: Just you wait...

2. Are you a voyeur or exhibitionist?

ME: A bit of both, but probably more voyeur.

DAD: Says she who will be writing this up on her blog.

MOM: I was an exhibitionist back in the day, but now I'm happy with watching other, younger, crazier people if it's a choice.

DAD: I'm a dirty old man; that's the only thing I can be at this age.

ME: So are you the kind who wears a trench coat and flashes schoolgirls, or the kind who leers?

DAD: Leers.

SVETA (simultaneously): Flashes.

DAD: Okay, guilty as charged.

SVETA: I like being flashed.

3. Do you take dirty/sexy pictures of yourself with your cell?

DAD: What's that you say? You can take pictures with the telephone now? Eh? I think my hearing aid has gone out.

SVETA: Yes.

ME: We'll talk about this later young lady.

4. If you were a hooker/pimp what would your name be?

SVETA: Um... Sveta? [Editor's note: she actually said Sveta, not her real name]

ME: Okay, then if we're going into business together, I'll be Oola.

DAD: I think you all will do just fine without a pimp, so I'm disqualifying myself from answering.

MOM: Me too.

5. And how much would you charge?

SVETA: I don't know what the rates are.

ME: Yeah, me neither. Probably a lot.

DAD: Worth every penny.

MOM: I thought you said you weren't going to be their pimp?

DAD: What, I can't be an unbiased observer offering consumer reports?

MOM: Seriously, no amount of money is good enough for you two, or for anyone in this family.

6. How long should foreplay last?

SVETA: A long time.

ME: I sense a hint here.

SVETA: No, I mean, it lasts plenty long with you.

DAD: All I get these days is foreplay, so as long as possible please.

ME: I think there's a limit; I mean, at a certain point, I want to move beyond foreplay. But I guess that depends on your definition of foreplay.

MOM: When you get older, you'll appreciate foreplay more than the act itself.

ME: Not likely.

MOM: Okay, fine, I like to get to it at a certain point too. There's a difference between attentive to my needs and secretly terrified to go any further. Or believer in too much Tantra.

DAD: But it's so much fun.

MOM: You're exempted, honey. I can never have enough foreplay with you.

ME: Get a room you two.

7. Do you own any butt plugs?

ME: Yes. Oh yes.

SVETA: Me too.

MOM: I owned one once. Never got used.

DAD: Ditto.

8. Hotel Sex with the curtains open? Ever done it?

ME: Yes. Lots of times. I guess we should have closed the curtains sometimes.

SVETA: No... wait, maybe, I don't remember.

DAD: Sure you have. If not, we need to find a hotel. You can't be in this club if you haven't boinked up against the glass for everyone to see.

MOM: Don't encourage him.

9. Sex at the in-laws or parents of whom you are dating?

SVETA: When haven't I done that?

ME: Once or twice, I think. I'm given to understand that you and Ernst may have...

SVETA: Okay, so you've got me there.

DAD: Actually, I'm not sure I ever have. Probably. But most of the time, I brought dates back to my house.

MOM: Aside from some things which I'll disqualify, I'm not sure I have either; your father didn't have that situation. Although I did go home with him plenty of times.

10. Feathers or Whips?

ME: I guess, if I have to pick, feathers.

SVETA: Yeah, I guess. Although I might try whips.

ME: Uh oh.

DAD: Feathers for me too; never been a fan of whips. Unless we're talking about cattle herding, in which case, whips.

MOM: I don't think we're talking about herding cattle.

DAD: Okay, you might be right.

MOM: There was a time when the answer might have been different, but I think we're a feathers-type family at this point. Not that I really want to be tickled either.

11. Would you let your partner shave you?

ME: I think we did that once, didn't we?

SVETA: I don't remember. But I'd let you.

ME: It's not really that erotic.

SVETA: I don't know.

ME: Would you let someone other than me do it?

SVETA: I guess. Maybe not.

DAD: I went through that phase, thank you, and I'm glad to be past it.

MOM: So am I.

12. Where is your favorite place to have sex?

ME: On my parents' bed.

SVETA: Somewhere in this house.

DAD: Ditto to that.

MOM: What, no one's going to say the Eiffel Tower?

SVETA: I thought you said it was the White House.

13. Do you remember your first time?

ME: Oh yeah.

DAD: I remember your first time too, girly.

SVETA: I remember my first time with the family more than I remember my first first time, but I remember that too.

MOM: There are all sorts of first times. I think it's best to remember the ones worth remembering. But I remember mine.

DAD: I remember a lot of firsts, but my first actual time... it's a bit hazy, but I remember it a little.

14. Where was your first time and how was the sex?

ME: In my favorite place and fantastic.

SVETA: Ditto and more than ditto.

DAD: At your uncle's house. If I can't remember it that well, it can't have been awful but it can't have been the greatest.

MOM: Yeah, mine was terrible.

DAD: How about our first time? I remember that like it was yesterday.

MOM: That was worth remembering. I think that was the first time I felt like someone loved me.

DAD: We made love on the back porch, remember?

MOM: Twice, then the mosquitoes got too intense. I had bites on my butt for days. Itched like the dickens.

DAD: But worth it.

MOM: Oh yes.

15. Role play for a minute? Who would you be?

ME: Karl, Frost Warrior with a +1 Battle Axe.

[total silence]

ME: Oh come on, you know, roleplaying? Dungeons and Dragons? Okay, fine, be party poopers. I guess I'd like to be Oola for a minute, as long as Sveta will come and stand on the corner with me.

SVETA: Okay!

[At this point, we struck hooker poses while Mom and Dad laughed.]

ME: Oh, I see; prostitute humor gets you, but not nerd humor.

DAD: Can I roleplay a john please?

ME: Let's finish the questions first.

16. Sex in front of a mirror?

MOM: Done it, wasn't all that interesting.

DAD: Me too, although with the three of you...

ME: You should have had them install the mirror in the bedroom.

SVETA: What's the point?

MOM: A gal after my own heart.

ME: I've done it too. I had to be careful not to get sucked into my own face.

SVETA: Like the Matrix?

ME: Shut up.

17. A song that makes you think of sex.

SVETA: Right now, pretty much anything that isn't death metal.

ME: This is like a "favorite song" question. I have a hard time coming up with anything but a random response.

MOM: Let's Get It On?

DAD: Dear, not with the children watching!

ME: You all rehearsed that, didn't you?

MOM: No, that song makes me think of sex. I even like Jack Black's version.

DAD: You Ain't Goin' Nowhere by Dylan.

ME: Ooh, that's a good one. But so is Let's Get It On, although the Marvin Gaye version is better. How about Barry White?

SVETA: Something from this decade.

ME: All the music from this decade sucks.

SVETA: Old fogey.

ME: Young whippersnapper.

MOM: Okay kids, not in front of the parents.

18. Are you horny right now?

ME: Okay, on three, one, two, three:

EVERYONE: Yes.

19. What is your favorite body part on yourself and do you show it off?

SVETA: I hate this kind of question.

ME: Come on, you're beautiful.

DAD: I second that.

MOM: I third it.

SVETA: Okay, fine, I like my eyes.

ME: Chump answer.

SVETA: I do.

ME: Okay, fine. I guess I like my ass.

SVETA: Me too.

DAD: I second that.

MOM: It's a very nice butt dear, but you know me; I'm not going to third it this time.

DAD: I'm too old to answer this kind of question.

MOM: I'm quite fond of your lips.

DAD: Okay, lips it is.

ME: Well, mine is the only one that really gets shown off.

SVETA: I know; we've all seen the pictures.

ME: Can I help it?

20. Edible panties? Tried them?

ME: Stupid. Such a disappointment.

SVETA: No, but I've heard from Lexi what they're like.

DAD: I can't believe anyone still talks about them seriously.

MOM: Pretty silly.

and

21. I need some questions; what do you want to know?

DAD: Are we done yet?

ME: Why didn't you have a real question here?

SVETA: You want to go upstairs?

MOM: Who's hungry for dinner?

And there we left it.

Finally, a Day Off

Mondays are the traditional theatre day off, in case anyone was wondering why they couldn't see a Broadway play on Monday. Don't lie to me; you weren't wondering that at all, were you? Anyway, while I don't always get Monday off, during shows I do because it's the way it works out.

So I couldn't sleep, and then woke up ass-early (for a day off) and crawled into bed with Dad and just cuddled with him. I wasn't particularly horny (well, any more than usual) so I just wanted to cuddle a little. I've been missing snuggles rather a lot recently; I haven't had anyone sharing my bed for too long, I guess.

The snuggles were getting more animated than could be maintained with Mom asleep next to us, so we got up and since it was still dawn outside, retreated to my bed, where the snuggles could be as animated as they wanted. It reminded me of some times when that wasn't the case; when Mari and Sheri were both sleeping in the room too, and they were asleep and I was awake, and Mike showed up wanting some late night loving. He and I were night-owls at around the same time for a long time; Mari's always been a morning person, and Sheri was so erratic as a teen that she might be asleep at any given time. Mike and I have both lost some of our ability to stay up all night, but we used to, sometimes. It was as close as we ever came to having to hide sex from the family.

He'd creep in to see if I were still up, and when he saw that I was, he'd slide into bed next to me and start running his hands all over me. We had to keep quiet because Sheri in particular is bitchy when she's awakened before she has to be (or indeed at any time; if you wake her up you get an ugly look at least, but then I shouldn't point fingers because I'm not the best person to wake up either). My bed was on the floor, which meant fewer things to squeak, but we still had to be somewhat gentle because mattresses and box springs and floorboards can still make noise during boisterous sex.

A lot of times, we'd be tired so there wasn't much danger of the sex getting too energetic anyway. We spooned a fair amount, him slipping up between my legs from behind, maybe my top leg wrapped back around him, his hands stroking my breasts or reaching down to diddle my clit. It's not a position that I love, but I certainly don't hate it either, and for slow fucking it's just fine. It can also be maintained for longer, I find. Or sometimes we'd be body to body, him on top of me between my thighs working in and out, our lips locked to keep the moans to a minimum, rolling over to put me on top, but in the same position. Often when spooning, as things got close, we'd roll so he was lying on top of me too, particularly if anal was going on.

Once, I remember, Sheri woke up, despite our attempts to keep things muffled, and glared at us for a moment, then she must have woken up enough to realize what was going on because her expression changed and she crawled out of bed and came over to join us. If I recall correctly, Mari wasn't in the room, either because she was in college at that point or because she was away, so once Sheri was up we were able to make a bit more noise. I just remember that moment of dawning realization on Sheri's face as she went from, "Who the fuck woke me up?" to "Ooh, late night sex!" We were all very tired the next day.

But that's all in the past. Today, Dad and I hopped in my bed, which was still nice and warm, and commenced pleasantly snuggling again, not really talking, both kind of tired but enjoying being together. I was on top of him, and rubbing my crotch up and down his thigh, which was very enjoyable indeed, when I realized that something was jutting into my stomach. It took me a moment to realize it because I hadn't expected it. I don't think Dad realized it either until I grinned and said, "Hey, guess who's hard?"

He was. It was great. I won't say it was the hardest he's ever been, but it was a definite erection, the first real one he's had since the unpleasantness. I quickly shifted positions and slipped him up into me, and enjoyed the hell out of that let me tell you, even though I was rushing it because I really wanted to take advantage of it while it was there. I gave him a wild kiss and rocked back on his cock a few times before it began to deflate abruptly, leaving me feeling sad and empty for a moment, until I saw on his face that he was really upset, so I kissed him again and snuggled into his chest and we just lay there for a while.

It's kind of sick to make jokes about it, but I'm sick and it's a coping mechanism. I feel like I'm toilet training a toddler; I have to act really excited about things which ordinarily wouldn't excite me. I have to say, "Wow Dad, you had a full-on stiffy this morning," and tell Mom like a proud mother myself, so she can say, "Fantastic, sorry I missed it." We're trying to keep his spirits up a little; he's been kind of depressed about the whole situation. I know he knows we're humoring him, so we do it a bit tongue-in-cheek, and he responds tongue-in-cheek too. We're coping. Humor is good.

Anyway, after a while of just lying there, holding each other, he said he was so lucky to have me, and that he certainly owed me something for my trouble, so I got an extra-long, three-orgasm workout from his tongue and fingers before he had to get up and get ready for work. I think he was late today (which is okay, since he's sort of on his own schedule) just for me. It made me feel special. And I'm hopeful that, before too long, we may get to the point where he can last more than a few seconds. He's got to stay positive so the stress doesn't cause additional, psychological problems.

In a way, even though as he's gotten older his ability to get it up multiple times has decreased, he's still a goddamn sex machine. I mean, seriously ladies, my father wears me out sometimes. So it's like suddenly the machine has exploded, and that's hard for him. No one likes to think about it, but there's a chance that even if he does get back to some capacity, it will be greatly reduced. So there's worry there. But hope too.

Non-Sexy Time

Perhaps you're wondering why meaningful updates have gone out the window. Perhaps you're sitting there thinking to yourself, "Jeez Louise, if I had the exciting life that Lexi seems to have, I'd have so many blog posts to make that I'd have to limit myself to three or four a day, just so I'd have the time to fit in some of that excitement. What the hell is wrong with that girl? She should be posting more."

Perhaps not.

Either way, things wax and wane for me as for everyone else, and occasionally there are periods where either nothing is happening worth reporting, or nothing is happening at all, or too much is happening, or too much not worth reporting is happening to give me time to report anything that was worth reporting, or tragical historical pastoral comical. Speak the speech, I pray you, like a dead ox that hath lain too long i' the sun.

Wait, hang on a minute. Get out of here, you Shakespearian thespians! Go on, scat! You're not even saying the lines right!

Okay, there we go. Anyway, at the moment I am hard up for time and for things to talk about, not necessarily in that order. The time can be explained by work, and the things to talk about can be explained in a slightly longer manner, and it's gotten to the point where it needs to be explained because otherwise it just seems like I'm holding back vital information when really I'm not.

I am not getting my regular sex. Or even much irregular. This is due to a condition which can be most accurately described as paternal inability and fraternal unavailability. Accurate, but not helpful. I don't really want to talk about it overly much, but in fairness I must.

My dad had a health issue last month, the culmination of a number of things, which has left him sadly unable to do much by way of erection. We're hopeful that, with treatment and practice, this situation will improve, but at the moment he's out of action, and unfortunately medication is not an option. It's a circulatory thing. Don't ask me; I'm not a doctor. Anyway, just to prove to all the doubters out there, I love him just as much if not more, and should the horrible possibility happen and he never be able to regain his vigor, I wouldn't stop loving him. We have tender moments, and in the spirit of recuperation both Mom and I have engaged in spirited attempts at revivification of the flaccid, but thus far while he's been able to achieve momentary stiffness, of the half-staff nature, nothing which could be maintained. It seems like it's getting better though.

My family's bond doesn't depend on sex, but sex strengthens it I think, so we've been a bit testy at times. Dad feels like he's letting me down, which I try to tell him he's not, but to tell the honest truth (and why not) I really, really miss having him inside me, to the point where I do feel a bit let down, even if I don't blame him for it. I'm not perfect.

This is not me being sob-y at all either; he recovered from his medical complications, and at the moment there's no reason to believe that he won't recover his former mojo. He's not in danger. We're happy to have him here. And it does mean that I've been getting a lot more from him in an odd way; it used to be that once a day would be the limit, but now that it's mostly about me (and I feel selfish about that) I've been getting shorter encounters at an increased rate. I spend a bit of time doing my best to liven him up, but I think the lack of ability is really driving him as nuts as it's driving me; it's hard to go from once a day to nothing at all, and my father is a man who enjoys sex a lot.

So I've been getting plenty of orgasms. Dad is really getting back into eating me out, something which we almost never bothered with much before; he lasts so long typically that I just want to spend as much time as possible being penetrated, without worrying that I won't get mine. I always get mine. Now, he's falling back in love with my taste and smell, or so he says. There have been a few days, lucky days when no one had to be anywhere (something that seems not to happen all that often these days) when Mom would work on his cock while he ate me out until I was gasping for air.

But despite having plenty of orgasms and plenty of what could definitely be called sex, I miss penetration. I'm just a gal who needs to be filled with a cock, often. I think the last time I had a cock was when I visited Sveta in college. Oh lord, and don't get me started on Sveta; Dad is really worried that she'll freak out about this, even though she knows and hasn't freaked out yet. I don't know why she would. But I think Dad's just projecting his anxiety or something.

Anyway, as horrible and selfish as it is of me, I need penetration. I can get by with just orgasms, but at a certain point my brain begins to deteriorate. So right now I'm engaged in an experiment to see if I can deal with months of no penetration. I can do it for anal, and have, but none at all will be tough.

I'm really not telling you all any of this for sympathy purposes; it just has gotten to the point where I really needed to clear up the situation so I'd stop hinting obliquely at it. Dad is fine, I'm fine (if a bit cock-crazier than usual), and I am confident that things will return to, if not normal, at least close enough to pass muster without worrying. These things happen. I know I'm not the only one, and I know people who suffer from various forms of impotence (or whatever the correct term is; like I said, not a doctor) who manage to deal with it. It's life. Just thought you should know.

While I'm giving status updates, to save from having to make another filler post of status:

Mike is working at some menial job he hates and can't get time off from, but it's better than nothing. Last I heard, he was trying to nail a waitress. I had hoped to see him over Easter because that was my closest hope for someone with a cock who knows how to use it, but I'm not hoping much because it doesn't seem likely.

Sveta, on the other hand, will doubtless be here for some kind of spring break, Easter or not. I told her, as a joke, that she should bring Ernst and they could both stay at my house. She laughed. To tell the truth, I'd rather she didn't; despite needing a hot beef injection, I'd rather have some alone time with her. Talking would be nice, as would other things we do when alone.

Sheri is being an idiot. I'm currently in a drawn-out cold war with her. I love her, but sometimes she drives me nuts. I won't go into it; too much drama already in this post. The one positive is that makeup sex is always nice.

Mari is really hoping that more states will pass gay marriage bills, as should we all, but she has a more immediate reason for hoping. She refuses to take sides in the cold war. Thus, I hate her too. No, only kidding. I just treat her like Switzerland and try to get her to give me gold.

The blog is coming up on the anniversary again, and I have something a little exciting planned, nothing major. The banner appears to be coming down 2:1 in favor of the skinnier banner; keep voting, although while I probably shouldn't tell you this I've already made up my mind, unless there's a huge groundswell for one option or the other.

I'm still not doing Formspring, mostly because they won't let you ask the right questions. But I still love questions, and you can always either comment (even off-topic; I'm not a topic-Nazi) or email me at lexinaughtygirly[AT]gmail.com if you've got one. Or if you've got quizzes. Or memes in general. I promise nothing, but I love fodder.

And lastly, I'm coming up on crazy time again at work, so if posts become slightly more scarce, I'm not throwing in the towel, I've just got a show to do. With partial nudity. Hooray!