Friday, September 30, 2016

Bad Decisions and Anal Play

Here's a question which no one has ever really asked but which has been approached by several people: "Hey Lexi, what's the strangest thing you've ever stuck up your ass?"

As a rule, imaginary questioner, I try not to stick things up my butt that I can't get back.  That means it's got to have a strong cord or a spread base.  I don't stick vibes up my ass unless they've got a way to get them out, and I don't use pussy dildos in my ass because that's why God gave us anal dildos and plugs.

So no, I don't have any stories of sticking a Coke can up my ass and then having to go to the Emergency Room and explain myself to a bunch of judgmental nurses.  I know, they've seen it all, but I don't want that to happen.  I don't need that in my life.  But beyond that, frankly dear reader, if you stick something up your ass and you can't pull it back out, even if the ER isn't involved, it can get dicey.  I'm not talking about things so wide the anal ring won't give them up.  I'm talking things which you have to, for want of a better word, shit back out again.

I've done stupid things in my life.  I've stuck things up my ass which shouldn't have gone there.  And every time, I wind up making a mess, albeit that I know this will happen and so I make a mess in a toilet.  Sorry, this is perhaps a bit more graphic than I'd like it to be, but let's just say that when things come back, no matter how clean you thought you were, they're likely to bring friends of a brown variety.

All that said, it's not an answer to the question.  So let's try to answer it.

Strange is subjective, of course; a lot of folks would probably think my brother's cock is a strange thing to stick up my ass.  But it's just a cock.  Maybe folks think sticking one end of a double dildo up my ass and using it to fuck someone is strange, but hey, that's just Thursday.

I think the strangest thing I ever stuck up my ass might have been a yo-yo.  Go with me here.  A yo-yo is perfect for anal insertion because it's a nice strange shape so it feels interesting, plus it has a string so you can get it back.  This wasn't a huge yo-yo or anything either.  It was a small one.

How did I get into this situation?  Well, I was with a guy and we saw it on the shelf at a toy store and started making jokes about how tiny it was, which moved on to jokes about how it looked like an anal bead (which it sort of did) and then I said, "I bet I could get that up my ass, easy."

Understand that at this point, it wasn't even really a date.  We'd never seen each other naked.  He knew I was sexual, and we'd been flirting as we went through the mall (because I hate malls and I needed something to do to keep from snapping and running screaming), but it wasn't like we both knew that we were going to leave and go someplace and fuck wildly with yo-yos involved.

"You could not," he said.

"I could."

"I dare you to try."

I don't think he meant it, but I grinned and bought the yo-yo.  I don't think he knew what was happening at this point.  I pulled a little bottle of lube out of my purse, waved it at him, and said, "You buy dinner if I come back with a string hanging out of my ass."  And without letting him say anything, I traipsed off to the bathroom, put a little lube on the yo-yo, and pressed it up into my ass.  No problem.

If this were a truly funny story, I would have pulled on the string to remove it only to have the string break off, and then hilarity would have ensued.  But this isn't a terribly funny story.  If you want that story, look up Jim Jeffries' routine about something similar, which is hilarious.

Instead, the Chinese orphans must have been working hard that day because the string was totally fine.  In fact, I'd left a large part of it wound around the yo-yo and when I pulled a little, the yo-yo rotated a little without emerging.  That was a nice feeling.  I can't recommend it because it seems like you're likely to hurt yourself or lose the yo-yo in a compromising situation, but I had to pull a little harder before it came back out, and it spun a few revolutions in my backside before doing so.

Then I popped it back in, made sure the string was long enough to show down the leg of my shorts, and came back out.  Yes, I was walking into a crowded mall with a yo-yo in my ass and the string hanging down, visible to all.  It wasn't that visible.

He didn't believe me at first.  I told him to give it a little tug, which felt nice.  I was close to cumming from all the excitement.  He said he thought I had it in my panties.  I told him fine, we'd find someplace more private and I'd prove it.

That private place wound up being hard to find in a mall, but we eventually wound up in a unisex changing room at a clothing store, and the degree of skullduggery to which we resorted to get both of us in there at the same time would take way too long and be too embarrassing to relate, particularly since all that happened was I pulled my shorts and panties down enough for him to see, bent over a little, and waggled my butt to show that the string was in fact coming from my ass.  "Go on, give it a little pull," I said, and he did so.

And then satisfied that I had won the bet, he bought me dinner.

No, only kidding.  That wouldn't be much of a story.  In fact, I pulled my shorts back up, tucked the string into my waistband, and said, "Did you like that?"

He nodded.  Of course he liked that.

"Want to put off that dinner you owe me for a bit and see what else you like?"

He nodded again.  That I had my hand on his crotch and could feel the hardon probably helped him make a decision.

So we skullduggeried our way back out of the dressing room and sprinted back to his car, then drove probably much too fast to the closest unoccupied bed we could find, then I let him spend probably too long yo-yoing in my ass, pulling the string to get the yo-yo to turn inside me, before I demanded that he fuck me, right there, right now, as hard as possible, as long as possible.  Getting fucked with a toy in your ass is always fun, and this was no exception.  He didn't last long, but I got a nice O in before he'd barely started, so I was fine with him finishing quickly.

Then I told him that if he could get the yo-yo out, he could replace it with whatever he might have on hand, hint hint, and he wasted no time pulling the yo-yo out and ramming his cock in, and I got a nice long assfucking.  He was definitely a guy who needed a warm-up before the main event, so to speak, and while I usually would do that orally, this was good too.

Once he'd gone above and beyond the call of duty, we dressed again and he bought me dinner like a gentleman (I believe it was fast food, actually; we were young and I wasn't expecting much) and then I whispered to him that I wanted a longer time in my pussy, thank you kindly.  He didn't complain, and we went back and fucked another respectable time.  As I left, I said, "You can keep the yo-yo as a memento," or something similarly stupid.

I'm kind of sorry I let him keep it because it really was a fun toy and experience.

So that might be the strangest thing I've ever stuck up my ass, or at least in context it was pretty wild.  But seriously, don't do it kids; you'll have bad luck and the Chinese orphans will have been sleeping on the job and you'll be having a great time pulling string until you realize that you've got the other end and the yo-yo is still in there.  And then you'll blame me for corrupting you and forcing you to explain to the judgmental nurses that you must have slipped and fallen while yo-yoing naked and doing some crazy trick.

But if you do try it and it works out, tell me how it was.  I enjoyed myself immensely.

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

TMI Tuesday

From the vaults, as usual.

1. Tell us something you have dreamed of doing for a long time, and why have you not done it?

Going to Egypt.  Because I'm poor, and the Middle East is not a good travel destination.  The same things can be said for a lot of places I'd love to visit, either more of the poor or more of the unsafe.  Yes, I know, I'm tarring a region with a brush without knowing etc. but it really doesn't seem like a good time to go to Cairo.  This isn't Muslim-bashing in any way.  I'm not scared of "teh terror!!!1!"  I'm just not sure I want to go to a place currently in a state of unrest.

2. Would you take advice from a porn star? If yes, what type of advice would you like to hear.

I would, although as we all know porn isn't real (it really isn't, kids).  But I'd like advice on sex from a porn star nonetheless.  I'm always eager to learn.  Maybe how to deal with more acrobatic positions, or some tips on taking large objects in orifices.  Or just anything they wanted to talk about.  I'm interested.

3. What is the sexiest thing about your boss?

Depends on which boss.  I have several.  One I love but is decidedly not sexy, also gay.  But he's a queen bitch at times, which I enjoy a lot, as long as it's not directed at me.  I'm just not into bears.  I mean, if he suddenly became straight and interested in me... no, let's face it, I probably wouldn't because it's not a good idea to shit where you eat.  But if I had to, I'm given to understand that he's quite well-endowed, and I would be down with that.  Plus even if he suddenly became interested in girls, he's got to like ass play and I would also enjoy that.

Other bosses... let's see... Well, one of them has a very sexy wife whom I would do in a heartbeat, shitting where I eat or not.  He's not terribly sexy, but I would join in with them if it meant I got to taste every inch of his wife's extremely hot body.  I don't often go for older women (because I'm a pervert, we know this) and she's not my usual type, but oh my god I would do her until she was begging for me to stop and then do her some more until she was begging me not to stop.  Large tits.  I could suckle on them for days.  And that's saying nothing of her hips and ass and pussy which I've never seen but which I certainly believe to be tasty as pie.  My god, her thighs too.  I would eat her alive.

But that's not really answering the question.  Most of the people I've worked for haven't been terribly sexy, nothing which stands out anyway.  Maybe I just don't look at them that way because of the whole shitting where you eat thing.

That's not to say I've never fucked a boss.  In my younger, stupider (yes, definitely, don't do this kids) days I worked for a guy who was considerably too old for polite society to allow for a coupling with me (okay, he wasn't old but I was young) and while I wouldn't say he was a smouldering man-mound of sex appeal, he wasn't hard on the eye.  It was a summer job, meant very little, and toward the end of it he brought some beer to work and after the day was done and the job was finished, he offered me one.  We talked and I sipped my beer and he started flirting with me, nothing extreme, just a little playful, "Oh, if I were younger," type stuff.

So I said to him, "Who says you have to be younger?"

"Well, don't you think..."

"Nope."  And I took a sip of my beer.  "I mean, I think lots of things, but none of them are proper."

"You do, huh?  Like what?"

"Like I would happily let you take me to a dark corner and have your way with me." I grinned.  Sipped.  He looked a little startled, but then he grinned and drank the rest of his beer in one gulp.

"I know a dark corner," he said, just idly.

"You're sure you're not too old for that sort of thing?"

"Well, at my age I usually take a lady someplace nicer than a dark corner."

"That's fine too."

"Dark corner first?"  I grinned and put down my beer.  And we found a place, not really a corner or particularly dark, but at the time it was the end of a run of long days and everyone was celebrating, so we had the place to ourselves.  He was timid at first, but once I had his pants off and was sucking him he got over it.  We fucked for a while, he came in my mouth, then he offered to take me someplace nicer.  I knew he was married.  Didn't care.  We wound up at a hotel.  The desk clerk knew exactly what was going on, but I guess I looked old enough to know better and not like a prostitute.  I don't know; it was near the theater and I imagine all sorts of shenanigans went on there.

I used to love hotel sex.  I still do, but get less of it.  There was a time when it seemed like I was fetching up at hotels all the time though, and since I never paid for it I enjoyed myself.  It wasn't a great hotel, but the bed was clean and that was all that mattered.  He didn't want to cum inside me at first but I wore him down with oral and pleading until he roughly pinned me to the bed and fucked me from behind for what felt like an eternity (not in a bad way) and then spent himself in my cunt.  He wanted to get something to drink, to make a night of it, but I knew that wasn't a great idea, so after a bit of tempting he settled for round three, slow and sensual, and then drove me back to work so I could go back home.

And then we had to work together for another two weeks before the contract was up.  It was a little awkward.  I think he felt guilty.  I certainly didn't.  It seemed like he wanted to ask me for another roll in the hay but was too chicken.  I let him stew for a day or two, because frankly if a guy isn't willing to put in the effort to ask for a second date, why should I go easy on him?  I'm not always easy.  But eventually I said to him, "Look, if it's awkward for you, that's fine, but if you wanted to fuck me again you just needed to say something.  I could use a good fuck."  We didn't go back to that hotel; our remaining trysts were all in various out-of-the-way places around.  He wasn't a particularly attentive lover, didn't go down on me at all although I did get some fingers.  But his cock worked and he used it reasonably well, and I was getting orgasms so I didn't really complain.  And then we said goodbye and I never saw him again.  Which is probably the best way to handle these sorts of things.

4. Name something you need for a foursome (and I’m not talking about golf).

Three other willing people?  No, only kidding.  A large enough space to play in.  I'm not saying I'd turn down a foursome if there weren't a big play area, but it makes it so much better.  I think a foursome can be accommodated by a king-sized bed, queen in a pinch, but any smaller than that and people start falling off.  Other than that, depending on the gender makeup, toys are helpful, as is lube and the usual supplies for sex in general.  Someplace that has indoor plumbing please.  The best foursomes, however, are someplace which has a lot of cushioning on the floor and a large area.  I do prefer bed sex to floor sex, but if it's properly prepared, a rumpus room is a great place to have a group.

If we're talking partner-swapping rather than a free-for-all, two beds are also okay.  Hotels are ideal for this purpose, particularly if someone else is paying for them.  I don't mind hopping up and running to the other bed.  But it is better when both couples are on the same bed, close together, so that people can play with each other even if there's not a free-for-all.

5. What is the brand of condoms currently in your possession (in your home or on your person)?

Durex.  I pretty much always have Durex around.  I know some people don't like them, so I've had Trojans too, but Durex is reliable and works for me.  I don't go in for flavors or fancy frills.  I don't think I have any unlubricated condoms, which I should probably get. I mean, I suppose I should get nothing but unlubed ones because you can always add lube, but having a lubed condom on hand means prep time is greatly reduced, and it's easier to store them for travel.  Hasty sex in awkward places is not a good time to pull out a bottle of lube and try to get things slippery.  That said, there's no such thing as too much lube, kids, so even if you've got lubricated condoms, have lube too.

Bonus: Tell us a sex act/behavior that you simply will not do. Why?

Anything with vomit or shit-eating.  I don't really even want to be present for vomit.  Scat... if I'm in a particular mood I might consider some light scat, but I'm never going to be ready to eat shit.  I've never been there when someone else was, and I don't know if I could stand it either.  But I'd watch or let someone watch me shitting.  I'm just not terribly into shit.

Monday, September 26, 2016

Golden Entry

Peter asks: "I believe you have talked about Golden Showers before but have you ever had anyone pee inside of you?"

Well, I talked about it a long time ago: http://lex-ploits.blogspot.com/2007/03/things-dad-wont-do-too.html

I was initially wary about "Golden" enemas or douches, but I got to really enjoying them after I tried them. That said, they're hard to pull off. I've only been with a few guys who could piss even semi-hard. I'd love to find a guy who could piss while truly erect because then he could be inside me and piss, but the pissing-in-pussy experiences I've had have all been from the outside, or right at the opening with just the tip awkwardly inside. I think biology is against me there though; the penis isn't supposed to be able to produce urine and semen at the same time, so the bladder gets cut off at a certain point no matter how much we both might want it to be different.

I was watching some porn the other day where they used a pair of salad tongs to hold the woman's pussy open so the guy could piss into it. I'd try that if I could find someone up for it. But it's just something which is harder to arrange and it can get awkward rather than sexy. I've talked about doing it on the blog, but I may make it sound easier than it actually is, so take me with a grain of salt there. And for all the times I've done it (which aren't that many) there have been many more times when it just wouldn't work.

The feeling is incredible when it works out though.  It can't be a "beginning of the evening" thing.  I've got to get fucked some first to open me up, otherwise all you're doing is pissing on my pussy. But when it does work out, it feels wonderful.

That said, I can duplicate the feeling with a hand shower attachment and a dildo.  I'd love to get a dildo which has a tube inside it which could be hooked up to water. But aside from the taboo turn-on, warm water and piss aren't different in feel and warm water is easier to arrange and clean up.  Plus the shower head sprays a lot more volume so it works all sorts of different areas.

And all that said, just having a guy piss on my pussy is a lot of fun too, and easier to work out logistically, so that's the majority of my experience.

Saturday, September 24, 2016

Weird Sex Talk

Bob asks, "What's the weirdest thing anyone has ever said to you during sex?"

What a question, Bob.  It made me think long and hard, because while I've had some weird sex, and weird things said to me during sex, nothing immediately leaped to mind.

I remember once I was fucking Gwen (my college roomie, look her up) with a strapon and she developed orgasm Tourettes.  She just sprayed profanity like a faucet had turned on and was somehow linking her to the Elemental Plane of Swearing (and I didn't see a silver cord either: geek test!).  It wasn't like it slowly turned on either; she went from moaning to swearing in seconds flat, and she was loud about it.  It didn't turn me off at all, but it was a little odd.  I asked her about it after and she said she was just cumming that hard.  I took it as a compliment.

I was with a boy in high school who moaned his mother's name as he came.  And it wasn't like we had similar names either.  And it wasn't like it only happened once.  I gave him head and as he sprayed me with jizz he moaned, "Oh Cindy."  At that point I didn't know his mother's name was Cindy, so I wondered but as far as I knew there was no girl in school named Cindy.  And anyway, I wasn't looking for monogamy from him.

Aside: I've never really cared if people called out the wrong name during sex.  It's happened a few times.  I don't think I've ever done it, although I did moan, "Oh Daddy!" once and that just turned the guy on.  He didn't ask, I didn't tell, and we went about our business.  But if someone has called out a different name than mine in the throes of passion, it's always been with people I wouldn't have been jealous of.  Maybe if Sveta started calling out some other woman's name in bed all the time, I'd ask her about it, but it's a device of drama which I've always found a little strange in movies and TV.  I guess it happens to people who do care.  Me, I pretty much don't.

Back to the story: so I figured, okay, he's calling out some Cindy's name.  Maybe he's imagining that I'm Cindy Crawford or something.  Whatever.  I didn't say anything.

But unlike many of the high school guys I gave head to, I hooked up with him again a day or two later, and sex was definitely on the table for this one.  But it was a date, of sorts, and so I came to learn that his mother's name was Cindy during the awkward small talk during our dinner (at Applebees, I seem to recall, which just goes to show what a cheap date I am).  I didn't put two and two together until we were rounding the bases in his car, and then I was too interested in rounding the bases to really care.

I blew him again in the back seat and again he moaned, "Oh Cindy," and my mind clicked.  He's calling out his mother's name.  Which might have been a turn-off for some people, but it wasn't for me.  I was more curious than anything else.  And I mulled it over on the drive.  We were going to his house, to hopefully do more than awkward car head.  His parents were pretty well off, way richer than my family, and they had a pool and a pool house, and he said we'd be nice and comfortable and private there.  I didn't want to fuck in the car.  I've fucked in plenty of cars, but hey, there was a pool on offer and I like pools.

His parents were home but were nowhere to be seen, so we sneaked back to the pool house, pulled some cushions and blankets together, and got naked.  He wasn't a great fuck by any standards but I got dinner and a pool out of it, and he was eager if not particularly long-lasting.  And he had a nice cock which was wasted on him because he didn't really know how to use it.  Still, he fingerbanged me to orgasm before replacing his fingers with that cock while I was still coming off the O and then fucking away for a minute or so.  And then, "Oh Cindy," and he pulled out and came on my belly.

I had to know.  "Babe, you keep calling me Cindy," I said gently.

"Oh shit, sorry, I didn't mean to..." He was all sorts of apologetic.

"I don't care," I said.  "But Cindy's your mom, right?"

And by reassuring him (and rubbing against him and kissing him and basically making it very clear that he could tell me anything and I would still be ready for round two) I finally got him to admit that he wanted to fuck his mother.  Never going to happen, of course.  That family was uptight like nobody's business, and had they not been Catholic they would have been the prototypical WASPs.  But he spied on her undressing and so forth, jerked off to pictures of her, etc.  It was kind of sick: not that he wanted to fuck his mother, but that he was basically stalking her, and so repressed about it that it was like pulling teeth to get him to admit it.

I told him I wasn't judging and I didn't care, but that maybe he shouldn't call out his mom's name in moments of passion with girls who might be less forgiving.  And then we fucked again, me on top, and he managed to keep from saying his mom's name.  See, I'm a helper.

No idea what happened with him.  I wasn't really interested in dating him, and anyway I wasn't really in his social circle.  I think he only took me out on a date because he thought I'd put out, and he was right.  I think I may have blown him again in a dark corner at some school function, but I'm not even sure.  Old age is tough, kids.

That's still not answering the question though.

I've had a few crying cummers.  That's mostly a girl thing.  I was with one girl who had been raped and thought she was a lesbian now.  I, of course, didn't know that.  I just thought she was another cute girl.  But when I was between her legs and felt her start to cum, she started just shaking and sobbing, and I spent the rest of the evening comforting her and getting the story.  But she wasn't crying because she was reliving the trauma; she was crying because she realized as she came that she wasn't attracted to me and felt like she'd been leading me on.  Which, believe me, made me feel like a total heel for making her feel that way, because I didn't care.  She could have jumped up, said, "Sorry, changed my mind, I don't think I'm a lesbian after all," and I would have been fine with that.

Rape messes people up in odd and terrible ways.  Don't rape people.  That should probably go without saying.

One girl I was with had her first orgasm brought on by another person (she'd made herself cum before but could never get it to work with a partner) and she cried because she said it was so wonderful.  So of course I made it my mission to make her feel that wonderful again, and again, and maybe even a fourth time if I remember correctly.  That was a fun evening.  I don't think she did anything to me at all; I was on a mission to make that girl cum as hard as I possibly could.

And I'm remembering at least one gentleman caller to my lair who cried immediately after cumming, but I don't remember why.  It wasn't anything earth-shattering.  I think he just had an excess of emotions.  I didn't mind, and we snuggled for a while, then I asked him if he was okay and he said yes, did I want to go again?  So we went again.  I know there are people who find fucking crying people sexy.  I find it a little sad, that's all.  Not sad in a pathetic way, just in a sad way, because I don't like it when people cry and I feel like I'm the one causing it if they're crying after fucking me.

But that's still not answering the question.

Okay, I've got one: in mid coitus, a guy turned into a Brony on me.  It was a little off-putting to have him suddenly start talking My Little Pony as he was fucking me.  I'm not judging.  I've looked at some MLP porn.  I don't know the show at all though, so maybe that was part of it; it was like Greek to me.  It was like suddenly someone started talking dirty to me during sex but in a foreign language.  Had he warned me up front, I might have been totally fine with it, although I would have warned him that I couldn't really talk back.

I can't even remember what he was saying, other than that it had to do with ponies.  And Princess Celestia, I think. Maybe Applejack. I don't know the names.

The thing was, it was really good sex.  And after the transition, once I had a moment to get used to the idea, I told him to go for it.  And it was just more dirty talk after that, even if I didn't really understand the context.  He even told me to call him by some pony name which I've forgotten, which I was happy to do, and he seemed to enjoy that.  The benefit for me was that I got to call him some made-up pony name (and probably say something about him pleasing the Princess) while he ate my pussy like a champ.  I came over and over again, and then we fucked some more, and I was pretty blissed out.  If he'd wanted me to call him Queen Poops-Her-Pants, I probably would have done that to keep the joy buzzer buzzing.

So Bob, maybe not a great answer to the question, but it was a good question to muse on, so there you go.

Bob asks questions of Lexi which are specific and invite recollection.  He uses a superlative but does it in a way which is easier to answer than, "What's the best sex you've ever had?"  Be like Bob.

Or don't.  Ask whatever questions you want.  I welcome them all, even if I don't get to all of them.  But Bob gets a gold star.

Hormones, Nothing But Hormones

I swear, you can smell the teen hormones coming off the stage from the back of the house. It doesn't help that this show is, while not porn, certainly the most overly sexual show about a bunch of teens to come out of the 1950s. And no, it's not Grease. I hate Grease, but this show might be worse in quality.

So I'm walking around before the rehearsal for whatever reason, and one of the girls comes up to me and looks around like she's worried. "Do you... have condoms?" she asked me.

As I explained, this isn't an odd question because body mics and so forth. What made it slightly odd was that she looked like she didn't want anyone else to hear, and also that she doesn't wear a body mic. But I figured maybe she was asking for someone else and the fucking den mother of this brood is unable to say the word "condom" above a whisper.

"Sure, come with me." She followed me back to the booth where I keep the stash of protective latex. "Who needs one?" I asked as I pulled out the box.

"Me. Well, not me, but I need one for, you know..." She trailed off.

"Oh. So this isn't about body mics then?"

"Kim said you had some, you know, that are for other things." Kim is the cute lead with whom I talked last time. I guess she's spreading it around that I've got the hookup. I wish kids would buy their own condoms, but depending on age and temperament, that might be a bit much to ask. Just doing my part to promote safe sex.

I took stock of this girl. She can't be more than 16, if that. Because I'm a lech, she's definitely cute, tiny little thing, little budding breasts under her T-shirt, not much curve, like a little girl. I vaguely remember being her age and sex-starved. She must have been eager if she was willing to approach me and ask for condoms. I'm not sure I would have had the stones at her age.

"So you've got some sexy plans?" She nodded, looking at the floor bashfully. "Good for you for being safe."

I think she expected me to tell her no or shame her or something. "You're okay with it? I mean, Kim said you were cool, but..."

"Why, because you're too young?"

"I'm underage."

"Is he?"

"No." She looked like she was expecting me to look shocked.

"Who's the lucky guy?"

He's not one of the adults. Not that I necessarily would have judged that either, but at her age I might worry a little. He's just older than eighteen and she isn't. Risky, but I think a lot of statutory rape laws are ridiculous, and I said as much.

"Why didn't he come to me for condoms? If he wants to get busy, he ought to take some responsibility." Yes guys, take some damn responsibility. If a girl is going to let you have the privilege of fucking her, the least you can do is do the awkward thing and ask me for condoms.

She looked chagrined. "I want to do it. He said he would but I had to get the condom."

"That seems a little douche-y to me. I mean, you're giving him a gift."

"Yeah, I know." And then it struck me.

"This is your first time, isn't it?"

"I let him feel me up last night." Like that makes you a prostitute.

I laughed. "That's not the same thing, lady, and you know it."

"I know," she said. I made a funny disbelieving face at her until she laughed. "His fingers felt really good and everyone else is doing it..."

"Okay, I'm just going to be the responsible adult for a second. Bear with me. Not everyone is doing it, and that's still not a good reason. Do you want to do it?"

"Yeah. Girls aren't supposed to but I do, you know?"

"Sister, don't let anyone tell you that. Girls want it plenty. I know I do."

"You do?"

"Hell yes! If I were you, I wouldn't get just one condom." Responsible adult fail. Don't care.

"I'm nervous though. What if I'm no good?"

"That's natural. But your first time doesn't have to be your last. And come on, he's getting to fuck you, right? It's his responsibility to be good." She laughed at that. I was mostly joking. She needed a little encouragement.

"Does it hurt?" They always ask that.

"Not if he's gentle. Make sure to take your time. Get that pussy nice and lubed up. And I'll give you some real condoms to help with that.". And wouldn't you know it, not only did I have a condom I could spare but also a spare for that because as I told her you should always have a spare. And then another for good measure.

And then, wouldn't you know it, I also had a box of condoms already open and waiting to be put on body mics, so I showed her using one of them the best way to put one on.  I didn't have a penis substitute... Oh wait, yes I did. She was shocked when I had a dildo in my purse, but I've been carrying one for good luck recently. It's neither the biggest nor the most scandalous, just basically a rubber shaft, but you never know when you'll need one.

"He's fingered you, but have you done anything for him?" I asked her as she was rolling the condom into the dildo.

"You mean have I sucked him? No. I was thinking I might have to do that first."

"You don't sound enthusiastic."

"I don't really know how. I mean, I've seen some porn, you know, and girls have told me about it a little."

So in the interests of preventing any more unskilled teen head in the world, I took it upon myself to show her a few pointers. Work the shaft, suck the head, kiss things, and don't try to jam it down your throat or anything like porn unless you've practiced.

No, I didn't give a dildo head in front of this girl. Not at first. But she kept asking questions about how to do it right, so finally I did engage in some light visual lessons. Then I let her try it out herself. She might be a natural deepthroat queen with some practice. She had very little gag reflex and was able to take a length in her mouth without a problem, although I stressed that she shouldn't try anything deeper, particularly in the moment when she was nervous.

"You're not going to do this here, are you? I mean, before the rehearsal and all? Take your time."

"No, we're going to go back to his dorm after. My mom thinks I'm spending the night at a friend's house." She giggled. She actually looked excited as well as nervous, which gave me a decent feeling.

"Well, you have fun and be safe and if he's not gentle you come to me and I'll beat his ass."

"Thanks. And thanks for, you know, being cool about it."

"I think it's a wonderful thing. And just remember, it's just the first time. You've got plenty to look forward to, I hope."

So I sent her off to pop that cherry. I feel good about how it went. Of course, I'm still concerned and am definitely checking up with her to make sure it went well.

Then, at then end of the evening, I was making my rounds and poked my head into the room I'd previously pointed out as a better location for the two gay chorus boys. The light was out, but I could still see them in there, again with the blowjobs. They looked surprised, but slightly relieved to see it was me.

"How much longer are you guys going to be?" I asked nicely. I should have kicked them out, but young lust is hard to disappoint. They stammered various things. "Tell you what; I'm going to finish locking everything else down and come back to give you time to clean up."

"Thanks ma'am," they chorused, and I was pleased to see that the blower went immediately back to his blowing without waiting for me to leave.

When I made it back around, they were gone and there were no suspicious puddles, so I didn't have to track them down and murder them.

God, I need to get some of my own and not hear about other people's. And by that, dear readers, I mean cock. Not pussy, which I have in abundance. I need me some cock.

Thursday, September 22, 2016

Trapped in Cute Teen Hell

So my last show finished and I went straight into the next one.  Literally straight in: I started tech week for the current show the day before the previous show closed.

This new one is with a theater I've never worked at, so while I know one or two people (and enjoy the company of fewer than that, which is part of the reason I've never worked here before) I don't know most people.  But I'm getting paid quite well for this one.

I'm also one of the few responsible adults.  I'm working for the theater, not for the show, which means I have a degree of power and responsibility.  But it also means that, when the train goes off the rails, as long as it's not the theater's problem, it's not really my problem either.  I get to sit in the booth throughout and watch the world burn.  Which this train wreck has in spades.

Not a good show, is what I'm saying.  I can say that without fear of discovery here, which is nice.

The only saving grace (besides the aforementioned lack of caring and the pay) is that this show is populated by seemingly scores of cute teens.  It's like dance recitals all over again, except this is theatre, these are teens, and thus being the responsible adult means I have a slightly different position.

Most of the boys are gayer than gay, which is cute and harmless for the teen girls but which means that I have already walked in on a teen boy doing things with another teen boy which I'm sure their parents would not like to know about.  The building is huge (it's an auditorium with attached locales, and in the evenings it's mostly deserted) so I was going to the out of the way bathroom to avoid traffic and came upon two of the male chorus, one on his knees giving sloppy head to the other.  They're really not very good at it; I could have hid much better when I was their age.  But they're young and in theatre and so they found a spot which wasn't in full view of everyone and couldn't stop themselves.

"Guys... maybe do this someplace a little more out of the way," I said as they scrambled to try to assure me that I hadn't in fact seen what I had in fact seen.  "Look, I'm not your mother and I don't give a damn, but other people might not be so forgiving."  In fact, I know they probably wouldn't be.  They looked at me like I was handing them the keys to a sports car, a kilo of blow, and a fistful of condoms.  I don't think anyone had ever made them that happy.

"Okay, we will," said the blower, wiping his mouth.

"There's a room right over there which is much less obvious," I said with a wry smile.  "And clean up after yourselves.  And you," pointing at the blower, "make sure he gives as good as he gets."

"Okay ma'am."  They call me "ma'am."  It's simultaneously endearing and makes me feel incredibly old.

"This is as far as it goes, right?  You're not planning on penetration this evening?"  Power.  Drunk with absolute power.

"No ma'am."  The blowee looked a little sheepish, like he was having the sex talk with his mom.

"Good, because I left the condoms in the booth.  And you shouldn't use those anyway."

Here I should pause and say, for the benefit of those who aren't familiar with live theatre, that that's a funny joke, although they didn't get it and probably neither does anyone else.  But I'm dealing with portable microphones in this show, body mics we call them, which are little battery packs with little microphone heads that you wear attached to your head.  The thing about body mics is that you frequently have to wear them beneath your clothes so the pack doesn't show, and that means they can get sweaty.  So, to prevent them from being damaged, you put a condom on the pack.

Thing is, you obviously don't want to use lubricated condoms for this.  And unlubricated condoms are harder to come by.  Also, since you're probably going to go through plenty of them in the course of a run, you want to buy in bulk and cheap.  So most sound people get their condoms from places that sell the rejects in bulk for cheap.  So, the joke is that you wouldn't want to use the sound guy's condoms because they are both unlubed and unfit for prophylaxis.  Get it?  It's funny, right?  No, it's not.  It was a dad joke.

"But if things go that way, you come to me and I'll get you some from my purse."  Okay, I was toying with them at this point because I could.

I am the cool parent.  If I'd had a fistful of condoms, I would have given those two boys all of them and told them not to come back until they were all full.  But that wouldn't have been very good for the show.

I figured that would be the end of my fun.

Aside from the legions of gay boys in the show, there are a few straight boys and a gaggle of adorable teen girls.  Well, not all teens, but they're either close enough for government work or they look it.  And while I'm not above ogling teen boys, I'd rather ogle teen girls.  Sorry guys, women are just more aesthetically pleasing to the eye.  I love a hunky guy to look at, but most of you look pretty much the same with your clothes on, whereas girls have all sorts of fun stuff to look at and they dress in ways which shows off the fun stuff more.

So I've been happily eyebanging several of the girls in the show.  Occasionally they'll mess up and their dresses will flare just a little too much and I'll catch glimpses of thighs.  No panties as yet, but I'm at a bad angle for that.

At the end of the night, I have to kick everyone out, gather up microphones, check the building, turn off the lights, etc.  I was making my rounds, hitting the dressing rooms, and I thought everyone was out front.  But no sir, they were not.

Now after my last foray into illicit theatre sex peeping, I needed a palate cleanser (albeit that the girl in those stories was teen-ish herself and quite easy on the eye) and the theatre gods decided to give me a pat on the head with some unsolicited teen sex in the dressing room.  There she was, the female lead (well, one of the three leads, all of whom are definitely eyebang material) in all her tanned teenage goddess goodness, pressed up against the makeup table in her bra and not much else, while behind her was one of the few straight guys in the show fucking away.

They didn't see me or notice me, so I backed up.  Part of it is my intense perversion, but part of it was that I had already interrupted one couple before fulfillment and I was pretty sure that if I interrupted this couple they wouldn't get to finish.  The angle wasn't great from my point of view; all I could really see was his ass pressing into hers.  But the cute little noises she was making were very nice, and I could see a little bit, and anyway, sex is sex.

Then he pulled back and she giggled (I swear, there's something about a girl giggling as she gets into position to get a load) and knelt, and then she saw me.  I wasn't exactly hiding; I was just standing to one side.  She got this horrified look in her eye for a moment until I smiled and gave her a wink, and then she grinned back at me and didn't say anything to him.

Gorgeous girl.  Looks a little Asian, maybe. Long, dark, reddish-black hair, a cute face with a tiny nose.  Short, very short, but tiny, with curves and breasts that I couldn't see because of the bra but which I put at maybe an B cup, although the bra might have been pushing her up a little.  Flat belly, tan skin all over, and perfectly proportioned hips without an ounce of fat on them.  She wasn't showing off for me or anything: she didn't adjust herself to give me a better view.  I couldn't see what I am forced to assume was a dripping little teen pussy.  But my god, the body on this girl.  I didn't need to see anything else to get wet.

She sucked him until he came, not a pro job on her part but sexy and innocent.  His cock, from the little I could see of it, was about average, but that's no bad thing.  And then he came with the head in her mouth and she just took it all and then swallowed.  She glanced my way and I smiled again and then moved away before he turned around and saw me.

When he came out, I was busy pretending to check things over.  He looked a little startled that I was there but didn't say anything and seemed to accept that I had no idea what he'd just been doing in the women's dressing rooms.  Once he was out of sight and she hadn't come out yet, I poked my head around the door again and found her putting on her blouse and straightening up.

"So... maybe find someplace more private?" I said suggestively.

"Sorry.  I know, I know.  Thanks for not ratting on us."  She gave me a smile.

"I honestly don't care what you guys do as long as it's not causing a ruckus.  Which is why maybe you should find another place, because if you know who were to catch you..."

You Know Who is the den mother of this particular brood, and she is a pain in my ass and would certainly cause a huge fuss.  I have no idea who she thinks she is.  No idea why she has been given power over this group.  It's not like they don't have plenty of other figures of authority, but for whatever reason this woman is the den mother.

"Yeah, she would."

"So, was he any good?"  I couldn't help myself.

"How long were you watching?"

"Just a moment or two before you caught me.  I was going to go out and come in louder, but I didn't want to interrupt you before you finished."

"He's good," she giggled, blushing a little.  "But he's got a girlfriend, so..."

"I've been there."

"But he's cute though, right?"

"Hell yes.  If I were you, I'd ride that train to the last stop."

"I just don't want her to find out.  She'd never forgive me."

So drama.  I am not great at drama.  "Going to do it again?" I asked.

"Yeah, I think so," she giggled.  "I mean, it's a show, right?  I had my first time during the last show I did.  It's like my little reward for doing it."

"Well, if you decide to fuck him again... did you make him wear a condom?"

"I'm on the pill.  And he pulls out."

Oh dear.  The young and their simplistic views.  "I only ask because you can still catch something even if you can't get pregnant."  Also, how big of a hypocrite am I?

"Yeah, I guess."

"If you want them, I have condoms in my purse.  Just let me know and I'll give you some."

"Thanks.  But I like it better when guys don't wear them.  That's why I got on the pill."

"Me too, sister.  Well, I'm not your mom.  Just looking out for you."

"Thanks."  She stopped like she was just hearing me.  "You like it better without?"

"Yeah.  Not going to lie."  Okay, yes I was going to lie.  "But I'm very safe and I get tested and so forth.  You really should get him to wear one.  I've got nice ones."

"We'll see."  She giggled and looked away and I knew that meant that no, she was not going to use a condom.  "Do you let guys, you know, without pulling out?"

"Why?"

"Because I kind of want to feel it inside me, you know?  I mean, if I'm not going to use a condom and I'm on the pill, why not?"

"So why not?"

"You think so?"

"Well, it's messier and you looked like you enjoyed the taste."

"I don't really, but guys like it when you swallow."

"That's not a good reason.  You're doing him a favor.  He'll like it any way you let him."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Plus," I added because I'm evil, "I bet he'd really like it if you let him cum inside you."

"Do you?"

"Okay, you've got me.  Yes, I like it.  I think you'd like it too."

"Do the guys like it?"

"Yes.  Unless they think you're tricking them or something.  But come on, the way he was going at you, just tell him to keep fucking you until he fills your cute little pussy and I bet he'll do it in a heartbeat."

"His girlfriend doesn't let him," she said, thoughtfully.  God damn it, am I instigating a power play.  "She's not on the pill but he always pulls out with her."

"That's just a bad idea," I said.  "He's going to knock her up one of these days."

"Yeah.  Probably."

We stood there for a moment.  Finally, she said, "Do you think he'd go out with me?"

"Come on, you're beautiful, you're letting him fuck you and you're clearly going to let him creampie you.  But you don't want him to just be interested in a quick lay from you.  You've got to be upfront with him."  Basic human dating 101.  And I'm not good at relationships.  Just sex.

"You think I'm beautiful?"

"From what I can see, you've got a body I'd kill for."

She blushed.  "Thanks," she said again, like I was offering her a cookie.

"Did he get you off?"

She blushed furiously at this.  "Um... yes," she said finally.

"Well that's all I need to hear," I said with a laugh.  "Girl, you've got to get off.  If they don't make some time for you, they're not worth it."

"Don't worry about that," she said, looking at the floor but giggling nonetheless.

"So if you guys want to fuck again, maybe do it somewhere else," I finished, somewhat lamely.

"Okay.  Like... if we were to want to do it again tomorrow, where would you suggest?"

I suggested a place which was both more isolated and far enough away from where I had previously suggested the two chorus boys go that there wouldn't be a schedule conflict.  She thanked me and traipsed out of the dressing room like she was made of rainbows.

I finished closing up, kicked everyone out of the building without uncovering any further trysts, went home, and made furious love to Sveta for an hour, after which she said, "To what do I owe this pleasure?"

So I told her about breaking up not one but two backstage teen fuckfests (well, I use that term loosely; if there had been an actual backstage teenage fuckfest I would have immediately thrown caution to the winds and joined in) and she said, "Let's hope you break up some more tomorrow, huh?"

I desperately want to get Zoe over to our house post-haste.  I also desperately want to suggest to my new teen friend that the real way to get a guy is to offer him a threesome with a willing responsible adult.  I will not do the second thing.

But I did my duty today.  I promoted some teen lust.  I feel accomplished.

Rimming Livetweets

Okay, we were going to do this live on Twitter but it seemed like a waste, since we'd probably just archive all the tweets here anyway and I don't know what Twitter's policy regarding this sort of thing is, plus that would require brevity in the moment that's not necessarily conducive to good writing.

Anyway, even though Sveta has resisted, I'm forcing her to take over the blog so she can give a first-person impression of her feelings while I eat her out, including her new favorite, rimming.  She suggested that I give the impressions while she eats me out, but who wants to read that?  Plus, she likes to be rimmed more than I do, and there's a decent chance she'll cum while I probably wouldn't.  So, without further ado, Sveta, take it away.



Okay, if I must.  Are we going to color-code this so people know who's talking.

[Editor's note: No, because I'm lazy.  But I will be lightly editing things for accidental errors in the throes of passion.]

She says no.  That's Lexi saying it, not me.  God this is going to get confusing.

Lexi says she's not doing anything until I set the scene.  What am I, a novelist?  Fine.  I'm sitting in bed trying to type this stuff with the laptop propped up on my stomach.  My legs are spread.  Lexi is reading this as I type it and telling me that I need to say that my perfect pink pussy is open and waiting.

In the time it took me to type that I could have cum five times.

Down to business.

She's going right for my pussy.  No foreplay?  This is foreplay I guess.  Do lesbians do anything but foreplay?  Sorry lesbians if I'm being insensitive.  I always thought foreplay was everything before the guy sticks it in.  I guess if we were using the strap-on or something.

You're not here to read about her eating my pussy.  She does it very well.  She says I do it well too, but I think she's better.  But then I've never eaten my own pussy.  I'd try that if I could, maybe.  I don't know.  That's just oral masturbation, right?  I do that plenty, so why not?  Masturbation, I mean, not giving myself head.

Lexi isn't reading this [Editor's note: oh but I will] so I can say whatever I want.

Getting hard to concentrate on typing.  Does she want me to cum?  I think so.  Damn, I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing.  Which is writing about how it feels.  But it feels good.

She's moving lower now.  Looking forward to this.  Yes, she's licking my taint now.  Ooh, now her tongue's on my ass.  Damn it, don't stop.

She says I have to be more specific.  Okay, fine.  She's back.  I like feeling her tongue going over my ass.  It's like when a cock presses on my ass before it goes in, but softer.

Okay, her lips are around my ass and now she's sticking her tongue in.  Not in.  It's too tight for that.  But she's poking it around the middle.  It feels like a soft finger.  But her mouth is warm.  So, I don't know, a massage?

She says we need to get me open a bit before she can really tongue it.  The first time anything gets stuck up my butt, it's always a little tight.  I remember the first time ever, I almost didn't think I would make it.  But all I have to do is relax and once it's in it's great.

Okay, finger in now.  I remember when a finger was huge.  Now it's just a little tickle.

Her knuckle stretches me out a little.  Ooh, tongue on the taint again.  I wish guys had a tongue at the base of the cock so I could get licked while they were fucking my ass.  That would be wild.

Her finger is all the way in now, I think.  She curls it a little.  That's something a cock can't do.  She's massaging the walls of my ass now.  It's not as deep as a cock but it's gentle.  Tickly.  In a sexy way.  A sexy tickle?

Okay, finger out, tongue in.  She's got the tip in my ass.  Lucky day.  Usually she just licks the outside.  Nope, still not enough.  She's going for a plug.

Okay, lubed up and she's popping it in.  Now I feel full.  Her tongue is on my pussy now.  Damn it Lexi, I can't cum and type.  Hang on a minute.

She's fucking my ass with the plug.  Every time it pulls out it spreads me apart.  It's like taking a crap but then the crap crawls back up my ass again.  That's super sexy, right?  No.  But it feels super sexy.

Getting pretty close.  Hard to type.

Wow, just came a little.  Surprising.  I love it when she licks up the juice.  I remember when I was scared to cum because of the juice.  Not any more.  Everyone loves it.  I love it.

What?

She's going for a bigger plug.  God damn.  Okay, really straining on this.  I'm glad I already used the bathroom before.  And an enema.  Be prepared.

While I'm sitting here getting used to being this full, enemas are great too.  I'd use one every day but they say that's not good for you.  Or maybe it is.  I don't know.  It can make a mess.

If before was like crap crawling back up into my ass, now it's like a freeway down there.  I love it when the plug's wide bit spreads right inside my ass.  Just keep relaxed.

Am I gaping like in porn?  I guess so.  Lexi's tongue is definitely going deeper inside me now.

How does it feel?  Damn it, I want to enjoy it not talk about it.  Okay, fine, if a cock is just a straight spread and a plug spreads in a circle, and a finger is a harder tickle, then a tongue is like a soft tickle.  But sometimes soft tickles are the ticklest kind.  Is that a word?  Whatever.

I want to suck the plug.  I want to suck cocks that have just come out of my ass.  Give me the damn plug.  It's hard to type and suck a plug.

Oh no, I can't suck that.  It's too big.  That was inside me?  Wow.  I could suck it, I guess, but nope, enjoying the tongue too much.

Okay, taking a break from typing because I'm going to cum with her tongue in my ass if I have to rub myself off.



And after that she wasn't interested in typing any more.  Let me just say that having her cum while I'm eating her pussy gets me messy, but having her cum while I'm tonguing her asshole gets me messier.  She came hard and got my hair wet.

Not an unqualified success, I grant you.  I mean, yes, I made her cum twice, but I'm not sure the "in the moment" aspect really worked.  But hey, now I know she wants to suck a cock straight out of her ass, so I can try to talk her out of it.  But she'll probably do it anyway.  Lord knows I have, albeit that I'm not into it like she is.

Let's see, from my end, what's it like?  Well, licking ass basically feels like I'm licking puckered skin.  There's not as much softness as licking a pussy.  Tonguing ass is like tonguing an extremely tight pussy, except it's not shaped the same way, doesn't taste the same, isn't juicy, and is, well, puckered.  As you'd expect.  Once I had her open a little, there was a tight ring I could push into, and then the inside was softer.  Really warm.  Tasted like ass, a little, so I'm not a fan of that, but like clean, slightly musky ass, not shitty ass.

Sveta's right about taking a plug though.  It's totally different from taking a cock or a dildo.  The spread right behind the anal ring presses into the pussy in a nice way, and popping it in and out stretches you in a surprising way, different from the constant pressure of a straight shaft.

Okay, enough.  I think I could probably get her to go off again, and in for a penny, in for a pound, I'm going to try to get my tongue as far up her tight little asshole as I can before I do.  Hope this was instructive for someone.

If you've got requests or questions for us, send them along.  I know there are a few questions I haven't answered, and that's probably because I forgot them, so feel free to send them again.

Oh, and in case you were wondering, this all happened before and I'm just getting it edited and posted now, or rather scheduled for now, which I should have changed because I've already posted another more recent story.  But you get an embarrassment of riches this evening.

Amen to That

I don't often repost articles, but this one caught my eye.

The Secret to a Good Date: Have Sex First

Read it.  It's worth reading.

Now, in fairness to the article, her point is that, if the date is going to lead to sex, you should have the sex then go on the date.  Which is totally true.  Who wants to fuck after a meal and dancing, or whatever you do on a date?  I mean, I'm fine with after, but the sex will be better if you eat after.  And then hey, have sex again after.

But she is mostly talking about going on a date with someone with whom you've already had sex, or at least it's not the first date.  And I'm behind her 100%.

But why stop there?  I think the ideal first date is sex.  What better way to figure out if there's anything worth pursuing?  Sure, you want to have the date part too, but why beat around the bush (pun unintended but welcomed)?

I fully support a Utopia where people meet up to have sex, then decide if they want to bother going on a date.  Plenty of my long-term romantic partners have started that way for me.  I wasn't necessarily planning it that way, but I've fucked first and asked questions later on numerous occasions.

And sometimes it doesn't work out.  Sometimes the sex is terrible.  Also, sometimes they don't want to start with sex, and that still tells me something about them.  I'm not saying that there's no place for "traditional" dating at all, just that maybe there ought to be a place for sex as a date.  Nor am I saying that I reject people who don't fuck immediately out of the gate, or that I won't give a second chance to someone who is bad at first-thing sex.  There are nerves.  It's like an audition.  The first time you have sex with someone really shouldn't be the best time, if you're planning on making a longer-term thing of it.

I do find that it cuts through a lot of the pretense and crap and gets right to the heart of the matter.  Are they patient?  Are they generous?  If they suck, is it because they're terrible, or because they're nervous because they really do want to be good for you?  Lots of things.  If polite small talk is our gold standard for finding out about someone, we need a new gold standard.  You can't really fake sex in the same way.

That said, there are plenty of other things in a relationship besides sex.  And despite what you might think, I don't put sex on a pedestal at all.  I think sex is just another fun part of human interaction, which is why I don't attach much significance to it.  Some of my best friends aren't very sexual, or aren't great lovers, or aren't quick into the sack.  But the people I get along with best are at least open about sex, even if it's being open about their lack of interest in it.  I don't really play video games or sports.  I don't knock those who do.  So if sex isn't your thing, we can still be friends, no biggie.

Plus, skipping first date bullshit and going right to the sex has the added advantage of skipping first date bullshit.  Plus, sex!  No more worrying through the entire date if you're going to get some.  You already did.

Anyway, I think the article is a fun read, if perhaps not a terribly deep read.  It's not philosophy or politics.  It's just sex.  Go get some.

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Orgasms and Edging

So as I'm sure probably most of the audience knows, there's a thing guys do called edging, where you work yourself to the point of orgasm without going over, then let things settle, then do it again, as long as you have time or can stand it. Seems like something one typically does as part of masturbation, although that's just the typical, not the requirement.

I have some experience with guys who've tried it. If you're a speed shooter, it can prolong the inevitable, and on the other hand if you have a hard time going more than once it can lengthen the experience. It's harder to pull off while fucking just because it means a certain amount of down time, but when Mike and I have done it he's found other ways to pass the time between that are plenty of fun for me.

I remember we once spent a few hours on vacation when it was raining and we were stuck in the hotel room. He actually started first, but after the first time, when I noticed he was jerking off on his bed while i read watching cable, I told him not to waste it, and he said he wasn't and explained.

So I pretty much did everything I could to ruin it at first. I tried to suck it and he ran away, and that devolved into us chasing each other around the room naked, which, shockingly, is a good way to lose a hard-on. Finally he let me suck it back to life and then some, but he pushed me away as he got closer.

So I bet him he wouldn't be able to last one more time. I can't remember what we bet, but it was probably a mistake on my part if I wanted him to lose, because he got determined and not only lasted through another, but managed two more before he said, "Okay, want to see what it did?"

I would also like to admit that throughout, I was slinking around like a sexpot trying to tempt him, to the point that I was getting right in his face with my ass, then spreading my pussy and spanking myself.  It got me incredibly horny, and when he finally said he wanted to fuck, I came as soon as he put it inside me. Which was probably for the best, because he lasted less than a minute and then came hard.

There was a lot of it, but it was thin and watery. And that's been my experience with guys who have been teased for a long time or who have edged. The spunk volume goes up but the thickness goes down. Not that that's necessarily a bad thing. Volume and power of a cumshot in the pussy can feel wonderful. If you're ever in a cumshot distance competition for your soul with the devil or something, I'd recommend some edging to warm up.

The best thing I've found is to get the guy off once first, then do some edging the second time because the pressure is off, so to speak. Second cumshots, particularly shortly after, can be a little less impressive, and some edging can make up for that. But that's not always in the cards.

I'm not a guy, so I can't judge how much more intense the orgasm feels for them. Some guys swear by it. Others don't. Anyone who wants to chime in, I'm happy to gather data. For myself, if a guy's not going to be a two-pump Johnny, and if he's capable of getting it up again in a session, most of the time I'd rather get him off twice than spend the same amount of time getting him off once. But sometimes it can be fun.

But that's not why I started this post. See, edging has always seemed like the province of gentlemen rather than ladies. For a lot of ladies, the orgasm isn't something you have to put off. Also, I think plenty of ladies do it but either not intentionally or without calling it edging. Either they make an evening of it with themselves or they've got a partner who has to work at getting them off and there are breaks for his pleasure, or something else.

But recently Sveta and I have been trying it deliberately. It's s not different for me though. For me, what we've been doing is getting me to the point where it hurts, then I get used to the feeling, then we work a little further. It's not stopping and starting, it's more a progression from light to heavy, with me getting used to it as we go.

It takes a while, so we don't do it every day or every time, and I've been getting stoned for it because that helps too. But I've been able to at least over some of my mental hangups about orgasms, which is why I've been having more of them. They still hurt, but they scratch the itch wonderfully, which helps keep me sane. And it's something I can do by myself too. Sometimes I'll get myself to a place where I'm ready and then Sveta will finish me off. Sometimes it's just me and a toy and some porn.

I won't say it makes the orgasms more intense. It does, but that's not because of the edging as much as it is that I'm able to get more aroused without it breaking me out of it with the pain, and I'm able to let myself go more fully.

Maybe it's not really edging. Maybe it's just practice. But it's helping and it was an excuse to tell some stories.

Typically we actually start out with anal play. I'll get a plug in and warm up for a while. Only when I'm dripping wet and feeling good will anything happen with my pussy. Then light pussy manhandling,  without any penetration or clit play. Then maybe a finger, slowly, then some clit action, then we see where it goes.

Still no multiples, and after the orgasm I have to stop, but that just means I can go after Sveta. And I don't want to edge her. I want to make her cum as hard as possible, so that may require some buildup, but I go after her with a vengeance. A reward for her efforts.

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Family Update

A short one because I've also realized that I haven't talked about my family in a while. Again, it's not due to any problems, but rather because it's been nice but business as usual. And I get bored with business as usual. That's my issue.

You may recall way back when that my father had been having some health problems. I'm pleased to report that he's recovered, at least mostly. He is getting older, so some things are just the way they are. He's still a randy old dog. It takes him a bit more effort to get it up, but we're willing to put in the effort, and once the effort has been put in (this effort is usually pretty fun for all involved) he lasts even longer than he previously did, but has no trouble getting off, particularly inside one of his favorite girls.

Sveta gets more of him then I do. She sometimes visits my parents when I'm unable. I was a little jealous about it for a while, I admit, but we talked about it and I'm really just jealous of sex. We've been working in that too, and I don't begrudge her all the loving she can get. When I was going through a rough patch a while back, Sveta had physical needs I couldn't help with, so she got her needs filled by Dad, and that was good for both of them.

Mom is fine too. She and Dad have experienced something of a sexual Renaissance since all the kids have finally left the nest. I felt guilty about that because it seemed like the fact that Dad had me in the house meant he'd go for me rather than her. But Mom said that wasn't true; her libido isn't that high and she was getting what she needed.

But now, they're like kids again. We went over to their place the other day and found them watching porn on the couch, her sitting in his lap and rocking slowly. They didn't stop and we had a conversation while she had him buried inside her. She broke off after a few minutes and said, "Okay kids, momma needs to cum," and then she hopped up and got on her hands and knees, her dress around her waist, and Dad started eating her out, then when she got close he got behind her and fucked her, hard, until she was moaning his name and, "Harder, harder!"

Then when she'd cum, she said, "Okay daddy, fill me up quick so I can get dinner started." And Dad sped up and finally pushed home and fired away. I'd be lying if Sveta and I weren't both cheering him on.

So Dad gets regular visits to Pussytown at home, but Mom's still okay with him getting some side action. She says it makes him friskier at home. So he's got, wait for it, a twenty-something chippy. My Dad is such a stud.

She's actually the daughter of one of his friends. They met at a function that my Dad was dreading going to, but then there she was, cute as a button. She's a tiny little thing. Looks younger than she is. When he found out how old she actually was, he said, he was shocked. So they were flirting a little, just innocent stuff, but she was putting her hand on his. He told her, eventually, "I'm old enough to be your father and I'm married."

She replied, "I like older men," and he figured okay, green light.

"This thing is pretty boring..." he said, master of subtlety that he is.

"You got somewhere to go?"

He said that yes, he could think of a few more interesting places. So they went to a restaurant for drinks. Or rather he bought her a drink because my Dad doesn't drink any more. They had a snack. Then she said, "This still isn't that interesting, is it?"

"What were you thinking?"

She put her hand in his lap and that was pretty much all that needed to be said. They went back to her apartment and he showed her just how much fun an older man can be.

He figured okay, one-time thing, but she said she liked him. Then he thought, okay, going to have to disabuse her of any idea that this is going to be serious, but she told him she wasn't interested in serious either. She's a bit married to her work, doesn't really want to date, and is totally fine with being a fuck-buddy.

She's fucked several of my dad's friends, turns out. She lost her virginity to one of them when she was 16 and decided that she really preferred older men. Had a steady boyfriend in college for a year or two but then broke that off because she cheated on him with a professor.

So, kind of my kind of gal. I'd love to meet her. Mom has, says she's lovely. Yes, Mom knows all about this. Dad doesn't bring her home or anything, but she knows Mom knows and she thinks that's just fine.

She needs a name. Irina. That's a good name. Anyway, Irina isn't exclusive with Dad either; she tells him stories about his friends. None of them are in the same situation: one of them is single and the other is a widower. But she's had married men before and doesn't care.

She did ask him if he wanted his wife to join, and Dad said no, Mom's not interested, but then Mom told him she might be, so who knows, maybe my parents will have a threesome with a cute girl. I'd love to be there for that, but that's not going to happen.

Anyway, that's my parents. It got longer than I thought it would, but they're fun to talk about when I get going.

Monday, September 19, 2016

Sveta Update

I haven't been taking about Sveta as much. The reason is because... well, it's because things between us are going just fine, but there's rarely anything interesting to report. I offered to let her write something, but she said if she wanted to write a blog she'd write one of her own. But I do feel like she's become a supporting cast member rather than my favorite lady in the world, so to remedy that I'm going to devote a post to her.

Sorry if more of the same bores you. That "more of the same" is stories about a smoking hot girl should help. Also, not sorry if you're jealous I get to live with and constantly fool around with a smoking hot girl. Deal with it.

Sveta is doing just fine. She has a job which is okay and she doesn't hate. It's not a lot of money, but money isn't everything.

Her family... well, that's a long story and the short version is that she does get some support from her father, but her step-mother is still a bitch.

She's still working on getting her own tail more regularly. She's never picked up a girl herself. She says she still gets nervous about that. No problem. Not everyone is a seductress. But she has managed quite a few guys on her own. I told her she's welcome to bring them home and I'll stay out of the way, but she usually goes over to their places.

Just last week, she bagged a very cute guy. At least he looked cute from the pictures she sent me. I also told her that she was under no obligation to tell her prospective flings about me, but she usually does. It rarely hurts her chances. She sends me texts and pictures in flagrante all the time, which I love. This guy was older, graying hair, but pretty built, which I know because she sent me a picture of him taken from between her legs while he fucked her. She said he wasn't interested in anal, but hey, not everyone is. He did manage to make her cum twice, once with a nice round of fucking, and then again while they were waiting for him to be ready again with his tongue and fingers. He wanted to get a close-up of her orgasm and wasn't disappointed. Then he rolled her over and fucked her lying on her stomach, then on top of him, then spooning until he came.

Before that, she had a semi-regular thing with a guy about her age who's friends with me, so I knew he'd be good to her. We actually shared him once or twice, although it was really more like he and I were sharing her. I did get fucked, but in passing, and I directed him back to her after a few minutes. No point in wasting it on me.

They stopped it after a while because they both agreed that the relationship wasn't really what he wanted. It was totally amicable and she told him that he had a standing offer for meaningless sex whenever he wanted, but he got involved with another woman and that got serious. We're happy for him, even if we might occasionally miss the sex. He wasn't shabby and could get it up repeatedly. I know she misses him more than I do. Not great with his tongue but he could fuck her until she couldn't see straight.

And of course there's my Dad. We visit whenever possible, and he's always happy for Sveta to rock his world.

And then there's us.

Sveta is a trooper and she's helped me more than I can enumerate with my medical issues. She's very patient with me when I'm not feeling sexy, shoulder to cry in and so forth. But she's also eagerly trying to help me work through the issues by making love as often as possible at the drop of a hat. I think Sveta's coming to accept that I really do enjoy making her happy in bed even if I can't cum, so she's been reaping plenty of rewards.

As I've mentioned, ever since Liam she's been really into rimming, and if I'm not as into it as her, I love eating her ass because she gets so into it. Mostly I'll be going down on her and just move lower after I've tasted her pussy to my satisfaction, licking down over the base of her pussy and then tonguing her asshole. She tastes musky, but not entirely unpleasant. Not as nice as her pussy, which as you know is the sweetest little pink hole in captivity, but I can get into it.

I'm still hesitant about sticking my tongue in her asshole, which she actually finds funny. "You're not supposed to be scared of anything in sex," she'll tease me. "Now get in there and stick your tongue up my butt or I'll tie you up and make you." She's goofy. My goofy, beautiful girl.

And yes, she still gushes. I won't say squirts because it's not really a squirt, just a giant upwelling of juice. But if I really work at it my face gets soaked. We change the sheets a lot.

She's looking forward to our next play date with Liam and Kate, as well as meeting Zoe, and those are both things that are definitely going to happen.

Anyway, while she's not going to write a blog post for me, I will ask her any questions you have. I can't promise any answers, but I'll ask.

Sunday, September 18, 2016

Like Goddamn Rabbits

Made it to the theater late tonight because of previous obligations. No time for anything more than an extremely enthusiastic kiss with Zoe. Well, several, and I felt her up mercilessly until she broke away, laughing, and said she wouldn't be able to concentrate on the show if I kept it up.

"I find it pretty hard myself when you come on in that costume," I said. Which is true, although last night I also found it difficult to stop from thinking about the blonde girl's body too. Plus from my vantage point, I don't see her face much. I'm horrible.

So intermission hits and, I'm somewhat ashamed to say, I was hoping to catch some more voyeuristic action, so I headed back to my previous fishing hole.

Lest you ask me why I'm not taking advantage of intermission to catch a quickie with Zoe, I thought of it, but she's pretty busy changing. I have no idea how the other two managed it. It's just not that much time, and I don't want to start something I can't finish.

Well, actually, I think I know how the other couple manages it because they were already there when I peeked around the door. I think she must get her costume on during Act I and he never changes, plus they're neither in the last scene of the act. Still, not much time, but they didn't seem to let that slow them down.

This time, wonder of wonders, she was on top. Again, in profile, which is really the best angle, and I thanked the gods of perversion that these two had no idea how to keep a fuck the DL. And better yet, she wasn't wearing a stitch. Her costume and underwear were nearby. He had his pants pulled down and she was straddling him and bouncing in a way which made my mouth practically water.

"Spin around, sweetheart. I want to see that big ass while I fuck you," he said. She hopped up and damn is her ass worth looking at. When she squatted again I could see her ass in delightful detail. She's got dancer's legs, strong and firm, and while her ass might be big, it's definitely not fat. Just a nice ass all around, and enough of it to hang onto, which he did.

He started thrusting up into her, hard, and she, despite trying to stifle it, was moaning. "That's right, sweetheart, take it," he grunted. A winner, this guy. But maybe she likes it hard. She seemed like equal parts pleasure and discomfort.

After a few more thrusts, he pushed her up with, "Sonovabitch, get over here with that cute mouth or I'm gonna blow it inside you."

She looked disappointed. No orgasm, I don't think. But she turned around and put her mouth on his cock. "Come on sweetheart, suck it out," he grunted, then pressed her head down. She wasn't about to deepthroat him, but he seemed to enjoy her resistance and after a moment he grunted, "Fuck yes, take it!"

She gagged and cum drooled out of her mouth, but he kept the pressure up and she seemed to accept it. Finally he let her up. She forced a smile and licked her lips. I imagine most of his semen had gone down her throat.

"Come on sweetheart, clean me up before I make a mess." Such a great guy. But she shrugged and licked up the spills. "Good girl. Plenty more where that came from."

"Tonight?" God help me, she looked hopeful.

"The bitch is out tonight. I'm gonna fuck you silly." He was already pulling himself together and she was still sitting naked in the floor looking up at him. It crushed my soul a little to see how happy she was that his wife was out.

Look, I don't want to judge. He seems like a shit, but maybe she's getting what she wants. Needs? I wish I knew what was going on in her head. Is she so desperate for affection? Validation? A good fuck? I mean, I've bad-mouthed her looks and that's not fair. She's a bit plain in the face and maybe her ass might seem larger, but she's hot as hell naked.

But I've already got enough on my plate. I shouldn't even be peeking. I'm a perv. Another reason I don't want to judge. But I like his wife. I'm a bad person all around. And if you're reading this, you're an accessory. No, only kidding. I just want everyone to know I'm far from perfect.

So he looked like he was on the way out the door, and rather than chance it again I moved away. She was sitting on the floor naked looking lost. It's my tender nature that I just wanted to rush back after he left and comfort her. In my fantasies I go in, she's crying, I tell her she doesn't need this shit, then I offer to introduce her to Zoe and everything is happy. That I get to share two hot girls is the selfish part.

But this isn't a fairy tale. I just have to accept that.

Feeling slightly depressed by life, I coasted through the rest of the evening, until I was backstage and Zoe was wearing a little short skirt and damn it, I'm human so I had to goose her. That made me feel better. Unfortunately, there was no chance of nookie this evening because Zoe had guests in the audience, so she went out with them and I went home.

Sveta and I talked about all this shit and she agreed that it was an unpleasant situation. Hell, she'd know; she's no stranger to feeling the way this girl probably does. And then we decided that the best remedy for all of this was to pull out a double dil and fuck like crazy.

We started with her sticking one side up into her wet snatch and then waggling it around suggestively. There was giggling. Then I gave her fake cock head, swallowing it down until I could tickle the base of her pussy with my tongue with the dildo down my throat.

We tried face to face for a while, but the dildo wasn't bendy enough, so we went ass to ass, and since that was going so well, we switched from pussy to ass and went ass to ass for broke, our butts bumping together as we worked the dildo into both our colons for all we were worth.

I felt guilty that I had rimmed Zoe, so I went down on Sveta with the dildo still poking out of her asshole, then popped it out and stuck my tongue in the gape. Maybe I'll get used to it eventually. I mean, I like doing it, but it still leaves me a little squeamish.

But I made her cum like a fire hose, so it was worth it. Then I quickly moved into her cunt with three fingers and went hard on her clit and got a second, exhausted orgasm out of her to prove I could.

Then bed. And then I got up again and wrote this. Now back to bed. Matinee tomorrow.

Saturday, September 17, 2016

More From This Show?

Seriously, it's like a sexy gift that keeps on giving.

So it was off-topic for the previous post, but at intermission I walked in on two actors getting busy.

Walked in is perhaps not the correct word. I stumbled upon them without alerting them to my presence. I was looking for a quiet spot and because I know the hiding places better than most, I managed to stumble on two actors in a place they should have known was a bit less private than they thought.

He's married but not to her. This isn't exactly uncommon in the theatre I'm afraid. He's older. She's not. Maybe not a teen, but twenties and, were is judgemental type, too young for him. I'm not, so I was thinking more, "Good for him, what a catch," than anything else.

As I may have mentioned previously, there are ladies in this show who dance in some revealing outfits. Again, not taking about strippers, but fun to look at for the all-too-brief moments they're on stage. Or off, for that matter; they're walking around backstage in those outfits for a while beforehand without much to do until their scene.

Well, while Zoe is my favorite for obvious reasons, this girl isn't hard on the eyes either. Tall, blonde, skinny but with a big ass, pale skin, but unfortunately kind of homely in the face. Not ugly, but... I'm being shallow. She seems like a nice person and I'm not saying I'd kick her out of bed or anything, but I'm definitely not looking at her face when I see her in costume.

So I'm heading for a spot, not to hide but just to be out of the way and not bothered. I heard noises and figured someone was there, and was about to head somewhere else, but the noises were, shall we say, intriguing.  Soft gasps and movement.

I'm not proud. I'll sneak a peek. So sneak one I did.

He's nothing to look at. I'm being very shallow, but frankly I wasn't there to look at him. He had his pants down around his ankles, fat ass thrusting, and then I got to see the feature attraction.

She was leaned over against the wall. They definitely weren't thinking because they were in plain view from the door. I didn't have to catch glimpses of her from behind him either; they were profile to the door and I could see everything.  Her little shorts were around her knees, her ass bare. And it's big on a girl as skinny as she is, but by God it was magnificent. I could see his cock thrusting in and out. Didn't get a glimpse of cunt, sadly, but you can't have everything.

Like he knew I was watching, he shifted his hands from her hips to give me a better view and pushed up her top. Delightful small breasts which he manhandled as he kept fucking away from behind.

Then, after some furious rutting, he pulled back. His cock isn't going to win any prizes, but it's thick. Probably feels nice good and hard. God, had it been a different situation, I would have just pulled off my blouse and joined them.  I could use a cock hard right now.

But I just stayed and enjoyed seeing her get on her knees and suck him with enthusiasm, stroking the shaft and sucking just the head. He held her head and forced more in, which she didn't seem to really enjoy, but she let him, and then he pulled back, said, "Get ready, sweetheart," and started stroking. She sat back willingly with her mouth open and after a few pumps he aimed and shot three thick ropes of jizz into her lips and tongue.

Then he patted her on the head like an obedient dog and I kind of wanted to strangle him, but made ready to get out of the way as he pulled up his pants, stuffing himself back in.  She sat there for a moment, then she grabbed a towel and wiped off her face. I'm normally against spitting, but if the guy treats you like that, I think you do what you want.  I could still see her creamy tits until she pulled herself together.

"I've never..." she started to say.

"You were great, sweetheart. Just what I needed. Did you cum?"

"Yeah," she said, but the way she said it without looking at him makes me think that, especially since he had to ask, she didn't. Poor thing. I'm not judging. She looked like she had enjoyed herself.

"Good," he said, picking up some things. "Your pussy was so tight. You've never had one as thick as mine, huh?" Don't flatter yourself.

"No. Did it feel good?" Poor thing, she seemed like she needed a win.

"With how much I shot in your mouth? Fuck yes. And that cute little mouth. You're a doll."

She was eating up this dubious flattery. She went over and put her arms around his back. "Can we... after?"

"We can't go back to my place. The bitch is there." Well. Never got the impression he was anything other than happily married before, but clearly he's not. Shame. I like his wife. Probably more than him. Not sure I would ever tell her what I know, but maybe. It's an awkward situation.

"Can we, you know, get a room or something?"

"If I don't get back..."

"Just tell her you're at a party." She laughed at that.

"All right sweetheart, all right. He moved in to snog her fiercely, then slapped her on the ass. "Can'tget enough, eh? Don't worry, I've got plenty more for you."

She looked thrilled. Poor dear. But I'm not judging. Get it while the getting's good.

They were about to leave and I had stayed too long, so I just had to shrink back into the shadows and hope they weren't paying attention. Not sure what I would have done had they seen me. But they didn't. After a moment she left, still adjusting her costume. Then he came out whistling. Cock of the fucking walk.

So, sexy, but annoying. I hope she got hers later. I think it's possible, since what I saw was a quickie. I bet he's not all about her even given the time though.

Well, I Promised Zoe

As I said I would, I brought a dildo and a vibe to the show tonight. I left them in my car because come on, that's all I need. "What, this dildo that just feel out of my bag and landed on stage? Um... prop?"

I also arrived early because hey, a little fun before the show is just fine by me. And wouldn't you know it, Zoe was there early too. Almost like we'd planned it, except we didn't.

We had oodles of time. She came up to me as I was walking in and gave me a giant, perhaps too friendly hug, a kiss on the cheek, and whispered, "I've been waiting all day for you. I need some more." Fortunately there wasn't anyone else around, so I kissed her lips much too friendly and then grabbed that cute ass. So fun to squeeze, her ass.

We immediately headed back to our previous trysting spot. She started stripping off her clothes almost as soon as we were in the door, but I had to tear myself away from looking at her to make sure we wouldn't be disturbed. When I turned back, she was pulling off her panties and I grabbed her ass and kissed it. She giggled.

Again, it was all about her. I really don't mind; in fact, I feel lucky.  We started with her lying back and me just devouring her pussy. She doesn't have much taste, even when she's really wet. I have no idea why anyone would mind going down on her.

After a bit, I said, "Shit, wait a minute, because in the hustle and bustle I had completely forgotten to get the toys from my car. Fortunately I was still dressed, so I left her looking lovely and lonely and ran to the car, grabbed my bag of tricks, and ran back. Or rather hastened back, because I ran into several people who wanted to keep me from my appointed rounds and had to fly casual.

Finally made it back to find her forlornly rubbing her pussy. She perked right up when I came in the room. I didn't say anything like, "So what would you have done if it wasn't me coming in," since she was just lying there, legs wide open, totally naked and waiting. Hell, if I'd come back and found her fucking someone else, I guess I wouldn't have been that surprised.

Her eyes lit up when I pulled out the dildo. He's one of my favorites, black and probably 8 inches. I have bigger and more exciting ones, with nubs and so forth, but she's a beginner and eight inches is plenty if you know how to use it. Hell, 5 can be plenty. Size matters but not as much as you'd think.

I also didn't bring a harness or anything. Strapons can come later too. I kissed the tip and grinned at her, and she looked extremely ready for the little guy. She practically grabbed it from me. "Let me show you what the guys are going to miss," she said.

She may eat pussy like a newbie but she can suck cock like a pro.  She told me she had plenty of experience doing that. "I did this my first time with a guy when I was 13," she said proudly. I didn't burst her pride by one-upping her, because that's respectable. Going to have to find out more about her previous experience. Sounds like she might have some fun stories.

She had all eight inches down her throat (well, maybe not all eight; she had to hold on to the end) lickety split, and I complimented her because that was clearly what she was looking for. "Okay, enough showing off," she said after she backed off.

I got the dildo back and got between her legs again, kissed her cheekily on the clit, then rubbed the head over her labia and delighted in her squirming in anticipation. "Don't tease," she begged.

So I stopped teasing and slid that dildo into her slowly but firmly. "Oh yeah, just like that," she gasped.

It didn't take long for me to work up a rhythm and I'm pretty sure she was cumming shortly after that. Then I wanted to have some fun. "Bend over," I told her. "I want to watch that cute ass bob."

"I thought you'd never ask." She rolled over, dildo still inside her, and presented her cute backside to me. There was more thrusting on my part, with some twisting thrown in for good measure. Sorry guys, but if I'm given a detachable penis I can do some things with it which feel really great and which can't be done by you. But a dildo can't match a cock for other stuff, so potato potahto.

"You... you can do some if the stuff you were doing last night if you want," she said, hopefully, hesitantly.

"I've got an even better idea," I said. Well, in fairness I had an even better idea, but I didn't think then was the right time to start fucking her ass with a dildo, so I went back to my bag and got out the vibrator.  It's a little silicone number which is not so good for penetration but since I had a dildo I brought it because it's wonderful for other things, and it's non-threatening.  And I took that vibe, put it on low, and started rubbing it over the base of her pussy.

"Oh wow," she said, shivering.

"I know, right."

"You weren't kidding about toys."

"This is just a taste of what they can do for you. We've got to get you one so you don't have to hit on strange women to get off."

I was gentle with the dil as I moved the vibe down until I was massaging all over her ass with it, then I settled down to just vibing her rosebud and started pumping her pussy with the dildo. I didn't push the vibe in, not without prep and lube, but I was making her colon tingle.  I switched to a higher gear and she moaned softly, "God, that's even better."

Zoe would like anal, I think. I confess a preference for her to get anal from a cock her first time, and maybe that can be arranged.  At this rate she's going to need her own tag. At least I hope.

After several more breathless minutes, she stopped me. "Can't I do anything for you? I kind of want to try it on you."

"We've got time. Go for it."

So I handed her the toys and stripped off my pants and panties.  Then I got on all fours with my ass pointed at her, slapped it, and waited.

She was ginger at first, but once she got the idea she wasn't going to break me, she started enthusiastically fucking me with the dildo.  "Getting to see it from this end... your kitten is so cute all filled up like that." She calls it a kitten. That's adorable.

"Want to try the ass?"

"What, stick the toy up your butt?" She's so cute when she gets shocked when I say stuff like that.

"It wouldn't be the first time."

"Okay." She grinned. "Does it feel good?"

"I'll show you some time when we have some more supplies."

"Supplies?"

"Honey, I'm not sticking the big guy up your ass without practice and lube. Lots of lube." I laughed.

"Don't you need lube?" Sweet of her to ask.

"I've been taking cocks up my ass for long enough now that it's easier. But we should definitely use a condom." She laughed at that, thought I was joking. "No, I'm not worried about getting knocked up by a rubber cock," I assured her. "But I've got lubed condoms and I want to keep him clean in case all this makes you want a little more ."

"And I thought the appeal of being with  another girl was no condoms." I didn't say anything about dental dams. There's a time and a place for everything and also  I'm not a great role model. She had no trouble getting a condom on the dildo, and then she was gently trying to push the tip into my ass like she was afraid of breaking me again.

"Just hold it there," I said after a moment, and then pressed back into the dildo until it popped into my ass.

"God damn, girl," she said, maybe a little too loud. "You just... And that doesn't hurt?"

"Go ahead, it's fine." With some pressure on my end, she slid the dildo deeper, then out again.

"That... that's really sexy," she said, almost as if she didn't believe it.

"It feels better than it looks." I was feeling pretty decent, actually. And I kind of wanted to take advantage of the situation and soldier on. "Now, take the vibe and work my clit please."

And that's how I managed to have an orgasm while being fucked and vibed by a coed.  She was thrilled. "I made you cum," she giggled.

"You sure as fuck did. That was nice."

She hesitated. "Can I have another before we go back?"

I laughed and kissed her. "Shit yeah. I'm dying to taste that cute pussy again."

She smiled and spread her legs and I dove in with gusto. It didn't take long; I think she was in edge after getting to fuck me with the dildo, the newness and taboo of it.  I wound up not using the dildo again, but I did bring the vibrator back to the party and she practically begged me to massage her ass again while I  licked her pussy.  I did, and then I did something I've been trying to get more into because Sveta is really going for it: I moved down and licked her ass.

Not going to lie, still not entirely over my squeamishness about it.  Her asshole tastes stronger than her pussy, a little musky and sweaty but fortunately not much like you might expect an ass to taste. But I wasn't really tonguing it, just licking the outside.  Then, because I'm bad, I looked up at her with a grin and licked a finger, then pressed it slowly and carefully into her ass. I didn't do much more than spread her rectum a little, not penetration, but she gasped and I thought I'd gone too far.

"Oh," was all she said, and then she spread her legs a little. So I fingered around the entrance, pressing a little but not going in, and latched my mouth around her tiny clit and sucked.  I know she came that time because she said so, or rather she said, "Oh shit, oh shit!" and melted.

I came up for air after a suitable interval and said, "That's just a taste. Trust me, the real deal will make you go bananas."

"Damn, I was really gone there."

"I promise, once you work up to it, a cock is going to feel fantastic."

"A cock?" She looked disappointed.

"Honey, if you want I'll fuck your tight little ass with whatever you want. But a cock feels great too."

"I'm not sure I ever want to deal with another guy after this."

"Don't write them off. Come on, don't tell me you don't miss a cock just a little."

"Yeah." She looked sad about that. "I mean, don't get me wrong, this is great. I could happily do this for the rest of my life, I think."

"You don't have to choose. I've got a girlfriend and she and I both get guys too."

"Do you share?"

"What fun would it be if we didn't?"

"I bet guys like that."

"They'd better," I laughed.

We got our clothes on again, put away the toys, and headed back to the real world.

I had to wake up early the next day so there were no after-show shenanigans, but I promised that we'd have some more fun at the earliest opportunity. And then I invited her over to my place. Because oh my god, getting her and Sveta together is my new mission. She asked if Sveta would be there and I said, "If that's okay."

"Oh, it's okay," she laughed. "I've seen pictures. She's sexy.  I just hope I don't get in the way."

I assured her she wouldn't. And I held out the promise of way more toys and butt things and lube, and rather than turning her away, that seemed to excite her.

So the show is coming to a close, but believe me, I'm not letting this particular show fling slip away.

Fuck it, for luck I'm making her a tag. That hasn't always guaranteed anything, but it can't hurt.