TMI Filler

Once again, from TMI. A lot of the questions there are so general that it's hard for me to come up with anything specific, but they sometimes spark stories. As always, feel free to ask questions in comments or email.

1. Have you used put anything edible on (or in) your partner's body and then eaten it?

Who hasn't done this? I mean, seriously, if you've been in a relationship that's gone beyond one-night-stand and you haven't done a little food play, you're missing out. I've eaten whipped cream and chocolate sauce off of cocks and breasts and out of pussies. I won't eat things out of people's asses, but anywhere else is fair game.

I once ate cheez wizz off of Mike's cock at the ballpark. Talk about plump hot dogs. It wasn't major league, it was minor league, and neither of us were really that interested in the game, so we went behind the bleachers, found a good spot unlikely to be seen, and he fed me nacho cheese with his cock. It wasn't spicy nacho cheese, thank god, but still, we wound up fucking and I got a little red in the cuntal area, if you know what I'm saying. If you're going to try it, I'd recommend trying it with the stuff from a can and then washing before fucking, ladies (or gentlemen, since I bet it would still hurt in the ass).

2. Have you ever had an AIDS test due to reasonable suspicion or hyperactive imagination?

It's not about reasonable suspicion or paranoia, but when you're as unsafe as I often am, it's better safe than sorry. They're not on my regular list or anything.

3. Have you ever fantasized about someone else other than your partner while you were engaged in sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation?

All the time. As horrible as it is to say, it's usually about a girl if I'm fucking a guy and a guy if I'm fucking a girl. I like the best of both worlds. But not because I want to block out my actual partner, but because I wish there were more partners there. I don't do this every single time, but I find myself fantasizing about wild stuff regularly when I get fucked. Dad knows and doesn't mind. Other partners, I don't tend to let on, particularly if they don't know about my family and I happen to be fantasizing about a member of my family. Sveta, for instance, had no idea that often, I thought about my Dad fucking her while I'm eating her out. It's not that I don't love eating her out, it's added zest. I'll probably have to admit it now.

4. Have you ever engaged in sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation while in a moving car? A car being driven by someone not engaged in the sex, oral sex, or mutual masturbation?

I've fooled around with drivers a few times, or while I was driving, but it's not safe so I try to keep myself in check. But in moving vehicles where neither of us is driving, hell yes. As I said in a previous post, the family car has plenty of stains on the upholstery.

5. Have you ever had sex so many times or for so long that one or both people involved runs dry?

Well, it depends on your definition of "runs dry." My Dad "runs dry" after once, sometimes, but that's not taking into account the length of one time with him. My sisters and I did once try to run Mike dry, and I believe our record was seven, but we couldn't be fucking constantly. If you mean "fuck a guy so many times that he cums without any semen," that's legendary skill that I would love to possess, because supposedly if you can do that, the orgasm is incredibly intense. But no, never happened, probably just an urban legend. I've fucked until parties were worn out, but "runs dry?" I don't know.

Bonus (as in optional): Name 5 things an unplanned (or planned) visitor would find in your bedroom?

Sheets, pillows, blankets, mattress, books.

Oh, you wanted something sexy, didn't you? Okay, likely there'll be a few small stains on the sheets because they'll have gotten damp and I won't have gotten the chance to change them yet (I can't be changing sheets every five minutes). You'll definitely find lube sitting by my bed; we have lube in nearly every room of the house, although it's not necessary anywhere near as often as it used to be when all of the family was there. A toy or two, definitely. Today, my standby vibe is sitting next to the lube. One of these days the motor on that thing is going to give out and I'll be heartbroken. 2 more? Um... my guitar, which I keep in my room for noodling purposes. And really, books. I read anywhere from 2 to 5 books at a time, so most of them while I'm reading them will be sitting by my bed, awaiting my pleasure. And I don't mean porn books. Right now, I'm reading War and Peace, a book about aviation in World War II, a Russian primer, and one of my go-to-sleep books, which I use to read until I fall asleep (I believe it's a collection of Robert Benchley). Not all at once, understand, but in succession, depending on my mood. Yeah, I'm a nerd.